regrets for the trip not taken?
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,735
regrets for the trip not taken?
This question is for those who have lost mobility progressively, rather than suddenly.
If you could go back in time, is there a trip that you would have taken even if it meant accelerating the rate at which your health issues increased?
Right now I am trying to decide on a trip I've wanted to do for 15+ years; it involves serious hiking and is not easy. Pushing myself that hard likely will accelerate some of my health problems, which include steadily decreasing mobility. I know if I don't do the trip this year, I never will.
Thoughts?
If you could go back in time, is there a trip that you would have taken even if it meant accelerating the rate at which your health issues increased?
Right now I am trying to decide on a trip I've wanted to do for 15+ years; it involves serious hiking and is not easy. Pushing myself that hard likely will accelerate some of my health problems, which include steadily decreasing mobility. I know if I don't do the trip this year, I never will.
Thoughts?
#2
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Florida, USA
Programs: AA PPRO (OW Emerarld), BA Silver, DL PM
Posts: 491
After having been in a wheelchair for nearly 20 years now (having a sudden loss of mobility) and not having traveled for the first 15 years, I now find myself asking myself the very same question. Although I travel extensively I know I will not be able to keep up this pace for long as I am those around me notice the accelerating weakness in my body.
Perhaps seeing the writing on the wall that my body will deteriorate at a much faster pace than those "able-bodied" I've made the semi-subconscious decision to accelerate my travel now rather than wait until I become much more physically burdensome on my travel companion and truly become unable to see what I'd like to see while I still can. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I do not want to get to your point of having to ask myself about the "trip not taken" while I'm still in the position to actually take that trip, because I know that day is fast approaching when I will truly not be able to take that trip!
Hope this makes some sense. I suggest you take your trip, push yourself now so that you don't have to look yourself in the mirror and wonder about the trip not taken later on.
Perhaps seeing the writing on the wall that my body will deteriorate at a much faster pace than those "able-bodied" I've made the semi-subconscious decision to accelerate my travel now rather than wait until I become much more physically burdensome on my travel companion and truly become unable to see what I'd like to see while I still can. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I do not want to get to your point of having to ask myself about the "trip not taken" while I'm still in the position to actually take that trip, because I know that day is fast approaching when I will truly not be able to take that trip!
Hope this makes some sense. I suggest you take your trip, push yourself now so that you don't have to look yourself in the mirror and wonder about the trip not taken later on.
#4
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Borrego Springs, CA
Programs: UA 1P, Marriott Gold
Posts: 181
Push? Or, rethink...
Yes, I look back at trips I made when I was more mobile and am glad I did them.
However, part of living with decreased mobility is learning that "stop and smell the roses" can apply to "slow down" and "travel differently".
There is certainly an endless list of trips still to be done - even with reduced mobility. Think 1,000 places to go in a wheelchair. Or, "river rafting trips I've never got around to".
My wife and I agree that one of our top regrets was not seeing "nudes on ice" in Las Vegas - and that was wheelchair accessible. Pushing yourself always has an attraction, but my orthopedic surgeon's admonition to be "extra, extra careful" is just as valid.
cheers...
#5
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 147
This question is for those who have lost mobility progressively, rather than suddenly.
If you could go back in time, is there a trip that you would have taken even if it meant accelerating the rate at which your health issues increased?
Right now I am trying to decide on a trip I've wanted to do for 15+ years; it involves serious hiking and is not easy. Pushing myself that hard likely will accelerate some of my health problems, which include steadily decreasing mobility. I know if I don't do the trip this year, I never will.
Thoughts?
If you could go back in time, is there a trip that you would have taken even if it meant accelerating the rate at which your health issues increased?
Right now I am trying to decide on a trip I've wanted to do for 15+ years; it involves serious hiking and is not easy. Pushing myself that hard likely will accelerate some of my health problems, which include steadily decreasing mobility. I know if I don't do the trip this year, I never will.
Thoughts?
My outlook on travelling? For me it's a huge part of what we call my emotional wonder a.k.a. one moment a year not "being sick/disabled" (never mind me dealing with it 24/7 and ending up needing medical help most of the times). Travelling gives me such a huge intake of life-energy, my travels really are major highpoints in my life. As such I couldn't imagine me not travelling. Not an option. It simply gives me too much. But; it does cost and can cost dearly. For each trip I sit down and look at myself in the "mirror". What could I end up loosing this trip? What is it worth? What things are "non-negotional" and which could perhaps be done differently? These answers chance over time, depending on the trip, my health and what not. As I only travel in what is on my "want to desperately do-list", the trips never are those "oh, don't bother, who cares?".
For me, it's worth the decreases health. However, that is coming from a position of knowing how high the risk is and could be/become I'm taking by travel. Knowing myself and knowing I'ld rather literally die trying than regret doing and living longer for however long. I know I can deal with the backlash any trip will result in, because of the good it brings me. Many can't, at least as many will find it not worth the costs healthwise. In those cases; don't do it, it's just not your personality and will not be worth it.
I do look into each part of a trip. I aim high, knowing I'm on more limited time and playing the "I can easily do Europe in a bed if I have to, but other continents will become very difficult by then, so let's do those first"-game. I will travel on a more costly way if my health benefits from it. By now amongst others that means I only fly business class. Eco simply does to much havock. My most recent trip to the US made me realise even a business class flight knocks me out. To such an extend, I've found myself looking at alternatives. So this time round, I'll be cruising from Europe to the States instead, enjoy my time down there and then fly back. Cruising both ways would take up too much time (can't do that healthwise) but doing it one way it allows me enough time to rest during the travel, having fun while doing it and getting to the US a bit less worn down.
Some things I no longer do, others I do in a different style. For instance not use up daily energy on "normal" stuff but rather get myself some help/use an aid or whatever and invest the saved energy into the trip or an excursion on said day. I'll spend more time at one destination now so I don't constantly feel the pressure of "want to do so much, so little time, ok let's not rest". Nop, if I invest an hour of energy a day, that's good enough. Took some time learning that, but rather this way than not going on the trip or paying too dearly.
My travels over the years certainly have cost dearly. Or better said; it has very clearly progressed my situation. To such an extend many don't understand. I wouldn't if I didn't know what I was getting myself into and making darn sure it fits me as a person. By now my docs no longer do the "are you sure you'ld do......"-talk on this subject. They realise it's part of what makes me "tick". They will be critical but are very supportive with me doing what I need to do and finding ways in balancing the scale between that and physical health. For me it comes down to quality of life, really.
For me travel is important to such an extend it benefits that quality more than the consequences of it hurt said quality. Just MHO obviously, but I believe all individuals should try to always aim for (improvement of) their personal quality of life. For each that'll come in a different form and shape but it's such a shame to see so many people totally oblivious to the whole subject. Which makes it full cirkel, as I think in the long run we'll only really, really regret something if it's directly linked to quality of life.
A lot of talking, doubtfull if it'll be of any real help.
#6
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,735
I keyed on that part of your query.
However, part of living with decreased mobility is learning that "stop and smell the roses" can apply to "slow down" and "travel differently".
[snip]
Pushing yourself always has an attraction, but my orthopedic surgeon's admonition to be "extra, extra careful" is just as valid.
However, part of living with decreased mobility is learning that "stop and smell the roses" can apply to "slow down" and "travel differently".
[snip]
Pushing yourself always has an attraction, but my orthopedic surgeon's admonition to be "extra, extra careful" is just as valid.
I thank you all for the thoughtful comments. I booked the tickets w/ miles, so am out only a limited amount of $$ if the trip falls through. However the morning after I booked them, I took a bad fall on the ice (love the weather this winter - NOT) and am currently in ankle brace, so we'll see how fast this heals. My doctor, whom I saw today, thinks I'm crazy for considering the trip, but that's nothing new.
#7
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: AVL
Programs: AA/BA/DL/US Air
Posts: 426
"Push" is of course a relative term - I'm thinking of doing a hike (pilgrimage) in 8 days that takes most folks 3 days, and using alternative means of transporting our belongings so we're not carrying all our stuff.
I thank you all for the thoughtful comments. I booked the tickets w/ miles, so am out only a limited amount of $$ if the trip falls through. However the morning after I booked them, I took a bad fall on the ice (love the weather this winter - NOT) and am currently in ankle brace, so we'll see how fast this heals. My doctor, whom I saw today, thinks I'm crazy for considering the trip, but that's nothing new.
I thank you all for the thoughtful comments. I booked the tickets w/ miles, so am out only a limited amount of $$ if the trip falls through. However the morning after I booked them, I took a bad fall on the ice (love the weather this winter - NOT) and am currently in ankle brace, so we'll see how fast this heals. My doctor, whom I saw today, thinks I'm crazy for considering the trip, but that's nothing new.
#8
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: SEA
Posts: 48
If your doctor approves, a medication change or addition could help. I usually carry a few stronger painkillers in case I have a 'stupid moment' and fall on my face. It's always good to know you can fall back on stronger meds if you need to, and your doctor may agree if this is a one-off prescription just for the trip.
If this trip is out of your home country, be aware many medical plans do not cover travelers out of their own country. Make very sure you have a list of doctors in the location you will be traveling in, carry a copy of your latest lab tests, prescription lists, and contact information. Also, I wouldn't go on this type of strenuous trip without supplemental emergency medical coverage. If you overextend your body past your body's limits, you may need specialized care and/or transport your own insurance may not cover. That can run upwards of $50,000 in certain cases. The extra insurance doesn't cost a fraction of that and is well worth it!
Still, all things considered, I'd go while I could, if our positions were switched. There are things I can't do now that I always put off because 'Oh, I can do that next year' was what I thought when I was young and able. Now I'm not so young, nor so able. I wish I hadn't put some things off!
Go for it!
If this trip is out of your home country, be aware many medical plans do not cover travelers out of their own country. Make very sure you have a list of doctors in the location you will be traveling in, carry a copy of your latest lab tests, prescription lists, and contact information. Also, I wouldn't go on this type of strenuous trip without supplemental emergency medical coverage. If you overextend your body past your body's limits, you may need specialized care and/or transport your own insurance may not cover. That can run upwards of $50,000 in certain cases. The extra insurance doesn't cost a fraction of that and is well worth it!
Still, all things considered, I'd go while I could, if our positions were switched. There are things I can't do now that I always put off because 'Oh, I can do that next year' was what I thought when I was young and able. Now I'm not so young, nor so able. I wish I hadn't put some things off!
Go for it!
#9
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: IAD
Programs: United MP
Posts: 7,822
If you think you can handle it then go. I've accepted that there are certain trips that I will never get the chance to take. I would have done them earlier if I knew in advance. That doesn't mean I'm not happy. I enjoy other things instead and just live with the reality.
#10
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Florida
Programs: Delta frequent flyer Gold Medallion Status
Posts: 876
When I had my fourth joint replacement my doctor told me I should think of my artificial joints just like I think of the tires on my car. They will only last for a certain number of miles. He advised that I take no step that was not a step I needed or wanted to take.
Traveling is our first passion, so I do not want there to be a trip I did not take. We are traveling now to those places that are less easy for disabled people and saving more easy experiences for the time when my illness makes it more difficult to over come difficulties.
We make adjustments. We do less aimless wandering of neighborhoods than we used to do. We use taxis more frequently. We do things much more slowly. We stop to rest. We plan adventures so that high activity days are sandwiches between less active days.
In the meantime, I make every step count. I budget them even more carefully than I do my money. I use my disabled parking placard. I use my mobility cart. When shopping I take advantage of mobility carts offered in stores. I only walk to those places where I really want to go. I use maps and ask directions. The worst thing in the world is to waste steps walking in the wrong direction.
Many years ago, when I could walk 18 hours a day we were vacationing in the Smoky Mountains. It was near the end of the day when we came to a large hill with the promise of a good view from the top. My friends debated about climbing the hill. One announced she was climbing. I said I thought I would save it for my next trip, and she responded that she was climbing it now because she did not know if she would be able to climb it when or if she ever returned. From that day in 1982, that has been my travel philosophy. Do it now because you do not know if you will be able to do it later.
Unless my proposed activity would endanger my life, or was guaranteed to have a significant impact on my future mobility, thus making all future travel difficult or impossible, I would do what I could now.
So, I will not attempt to climb Mt. Everest, but I am going to take my grandchildren to Disney World.
Traveling is our first passion, so I do not want there to be a trip I did not take. We are traveling now to those places that are less easy for disabled people and saving more easy experiences for the time when my illness makes it more difficult to over come difficulties.
We make adjustments. We do less aimless wandering of neighborhoods than we used to do. We use taxis more frequently. We do things much more slowly. We stop to rest. We plan adventures so that high activity days are sandwiches between less active days.
In the meantime, I make every step count. I budget them even more carefully than I do my money. I use my disabled parking placard. I use my mobility cart. When shopping I take advantage of mobility carts offered in stores. I only walk to those places where I really want to go. I use maps and ask directions. The worst thing in the world is to waste steps walking in the wrong direction.
Many years ago, when I could walk 18 hours a day we were vacationing in the Smoky Mountains. It was near the end of the day when we came to a large hill with the promise of a good view from the top. My friends debated about climbing the hill. One announced she was climbing. I said I thought I would save it for my next trip, and she responded that she was climbing it now because she did not know if she would be able to climb it when or if she ever returned. From that day in 1982, that has been my travel philosophy. Do it now because you do not know if you will be able to do it later.
Unless my proposed activity would endanger my life, or was guaranteed to have a significant impact on my future mobility, thus making all future travel difficult or impossible, I would do what I could now.
So, I will not attempt to climb Mt. Everest, but I am going to take my grandchildren to Disney World.
#11
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 8,142
Almost 11 years ago it came as a total surprise knocking on my door; my syndrome really started to become apparent and I suddenly lost my mobility. Ever since it has been progressive, will continue to be so and acts in such a way it does not recoup from from overdoing it but will mean permanent new base level. This is not just influencing my mobility, but it's a general health thing. Mobility, practicle usage of limbs, organs, if it's in the body, it's going downhill either slowly or rapidly.
My outlook on travelling? For me it's a huge part of what we call my emotional wonder a.k.a. one moment a year not "being sick/disabled" (never mind me dealing with it 24/7 and ending up needing medical help most of the times). Travelling gives me such a huge intake of life-energy, my travels really are major highpoints in my life. As such I couldn't imagine me not travelling. Not an option. It simply gives me too much. But; it does cost and can cost dearly. For each trip I sit down and look at myself in the "mirror". What could I end up loosing this trip? What is it worth? What things are "non-negotional" and which could perhaps be done differently? These answers chance over time, depending on the trip, my health and what not. As I only travel in what is on my "want to desperately do-list", the trips never are those "oh, don't bother, who cares?".
For me, it's worth the decreases health. However, that is coming from a position of knowing how high the risk is and could be/become I'm taking by travel. Knowing myself and knowing I'ld rather literally die trying than regret doing and living longer for however long. I know I can deal with the backlash any trip will result in, because of the good it brings me. Many can't, at least as many will find it not worth the costs healthwise. In those cases; don't do it, it's just not your personality and will not be worth it.
I do look into each part of a trip. I aim high, knowing I'm on more limited time and playing the "I can easily do Europe in a bed if I have to, but other continents will become very difficult by then, so let's do those first"-game. I will travel on a more costly way if my health benefits from it. By now amongst others that means I only fly business class. Eco simply does to much havock. My most recent trip to the US made me realise even a business class flight knocks me out. To such an extend, I've found myself looking at alternatives. So this time round, I'll be cruising from Europe to the States instead, enjoy my time down there and then fly back. Cruising both ways would take up too much time (can't do that healthwise) but doing it one way it allows me enough time to rest during the travel, having fun while doing it and getting to the US a bit less worn down.
Some things I no longer do, others I do in a different style. For instance not use up daily energy on "normal" stuff but rather get myself some help/use an aid or whatever and invest the saved energy into the trip or an excursion on said day. I'll spend more time at one destination now so I don't constantly feel the pressure of "want to do so much, so little time, ok let's not rest". Nop, if I invest an hour of energy a day, that's good enough. Took some time learning that, but rather this way than not going on the trip or paying too dearly.
My travels over the years certainly have cost dearly. Or better said; it has very clearly progressed my situation. To such an extend many don't understand. I wouldn't if I didn't know what I was getting myself into and making darn sure it fits me as a person. By now my docs no longer do the "are you sure you'ld do......"-talk on this subject. They realise it's part of what makes me "tick". They will be critical but are very supportive with me doing what I need to do and finding ways in balancing the scale between that and physical health. For me it comes down to quality of life, really.
For me travel is important to such an extend it benefits that quality more than the consequences of it hurt said quality. Just MHO obviously, but I believe all individuals should try to always aim for (improvement of) their personal quality of life. For each that'll come in a different form and shape but it's such a shame to see so many people totally oblivious to the whole subject. Which makes it full cirkel, as I think in the long run we'll only really, really regret something if it's directly linked to quality of life.
A lot of talking, doubtfull if it'll be of any real help.
My outlook on travelling? For me it's a huge part of what we call my emotional wonder a.k.a. one moment a year not "being sick/disabled" (never mind me dealing with it 24/7 and ending up needing medical help most of the times). Travelling gives me such a huge intake of life-energy, my travels really are major highpoints in my life. As such I couldn't imagine me not travelling. Not an option. It simply gives me too much. But; it does cost and can cost dearly. For each trip I sit down and look at myself in the "mirror". What could I end up loosing this trip? What is it worth? What things are "non-negotional" and which could perhaps be done differently? These answers chance over time, depending on the trip, my health and what not. As I only travel in what is on my "want to desperately do-list", the trips never are those "oh, don't bother, who cares?".
For me, it's worth the decreases health. However, that is coming from a position of knowing how high the risk is and could be/become I'm taking by travel. Knowing myself and knowing I'ld rather literally die trying than regret doing and living longer for however long. I know I can deal with the backlash any trip will result in, because of the good it brings me. Many can't, at least as many will find it not worth the costs healthwise. In those cases; don't do it, it's just not your personality and will not be worth it.
I do look into each part of a trip. I aim high, knowing I'm on more limited time and playing the "I can easily do Europe in a bed if I have to, but other continents will become very difficult by then, so let's do those first"-game. I will travel on a more costly way if my health benefits from it. By now amongst others that means I only fly business class. Eco simply does to much havock. My most recent trip to the US made me realise even a business class flight knocks me out. To such an extend, I've found myself looking at alternatives. So this time round, I'll be cruising from Europe to the States instead, enjoy my time down there and then fly back. Cruising both ways would take up too much time (can't do that healthwise) but doing it one way it allows me enough time to rest during the travel, having fun while doing it and getting to the US a bit less worn down.
Some things I no longer do, others I do in a different style. For instance not use up daily energy on "normal" stuff but rather get myself some help/use an aid or whatever and invest the saved energy into the trip or an excursion on said day. I'll spend more time at one destination now so I don't constantly feel the pressure of "want to do so much, so little time, ok let's not rest". Nop, if I invest an hour of energy a day, that's good enough. Took some time learning that, but rather this way than not going on the trip or paying too dearly.
My travels over the years certainly have cost dearly. Or better said; it has very clearly progressed my situation. To such an extend many don't understand. I wouldn't if I didn't know what I was getting myself into and making darn sure it fits me as a person. By now my docs no longer do the "are you sure you'ld do......"-talk on this subject. They realise it's part of what makes me "tick". They will be critical but are very supportive with me doing what I need to do and finding ways in balancing the scale between that and physical health. For me it comes down to quality of life, really.
For me travel is important to such an extend it benefits that quality more than the consequences of it hurt said quality. Just MHO obviously, but I believe all individuals should try to always aim for (improvement of) their personal quality of life. For each that'll come in a different form and shape but it's such a shame to see so many people totally oblivious to the whole subject. Which makes it full cirkel, as I think in the long run we'll only really, really regret something if it's directly linked to quality of life.
A lot of talking, doubtfull if it'll be of any real help.
Bobette
#12
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 12
My health usually suffers after a trip and my condition is slowly progressive. I am of the opinion that I will do whatever I am still able to do while I can, even if that means I am risking my well-being. Of course, I have to pick my battles- and choose to go where I really want to go only. I can only afford economy class travel so flights are especially hard. But I want a chance to have a holiday, forget about my day-day troubles, be somewhere breathtaking, and recharge emotionally and my travels offer me that. It sort of comes down to emotional recharge vs. physical toll. But I don't want to have any regrets when I am older, so I choose to travel.
#13
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,735
trip indefinitely postponed
Just when you think you have one problem under control, something else happens...
Let's just describe the current issue as "bleeding feet" and leave it at that.
Had the baseline health issues stable, was recovering from the ankle injury, and then ran into other unexpected health problems. So for now our much anticipated trip is off, with a chance to reschedule for fall. The good news is DL isn't charging me a rebooking fee - they had made 2 minor schedule changes to our itinerary, and because of that, they're letting me change the dates entirely without the nasty charges I was expecting.
Thank you all for the comments above.
Let's just describe the current issue as "bleeding feet" and leave it at that.
Had the baseline health issues stable, was recovering from the ankle injury, and then ran into other unexpected health problems. So for now our much anticipated trip is off, with a chance to reschedule for fall. The good news is DL isn't charging me a rebooking fee - they had made 2 minor schedule changes to our itinerary, and because of that, they're letting me change the dates entirely without the nasty charges I was expecting.
Thank you all for the comments above.
#14
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: DEN
Posts: 1,962
My big trip to France is coming up soon (beginning of June) - just the logistics have been very tiring, and now my husband is looking at every minor symptom that comes up as a possible trip-breaker (in an "I told you so" sort of way) - it takes a lot of mental energy to sustain the belief that even if I'm unable to do the trip the way I had hoped to, I'm still going to enjoy it.
But I'm still going to enjoy it.
#15
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 8,142
Oh, I am sorry to hear that you're having problems! "Bleeding feet" doesn't sound good. I hope you feel better soon, that you can reschedule for the fall, and I'm glad that you were able to avoid big change fees.
My big trip to France is coming up soon (beginning of June) - just the logistics have been very tiring, and now my husband is looking at every minor symptom that comes up as a possible trip-breaker (in an "I told you so" sort of way) - it takes a lot of mental energy to sustain the belief that even if I'm unable to do the trip the way I had hoped to, I'm still going to enjoy it.
But I'm still going to enjoy it.
My big trip to France is coming up soon (beginning of June) - just the logistics have been very tiring, and now my husband is looking at every minor symptom that comes up as a possible trip-breaker (in an "I told you so" sort of way) - it takes a lot of mental energy to sustain the belief that even if I'm unable to do the trip the way I had hoped to, I'm still going to enjoy it.
But I'm still going to enjoy it.
Bobette