All Tied up at the Moment: This Week’s Worst Flyers

Every Friday, FlyerTalk looks back at the week’s most charming individuals. While there are always plenty of contenders for our Worst Passenger of the Week award, only one lucky flyer can take home the glory. Here are this week’s winners.

Third Place – Dangerous Lip Service

A couple of weeks ago, when TSA screeners discovered a knife hidden in a lipstick tube at Albany International Airport (ALB), the femme fatale responsible barely missed the cut for Worst Passenger of the Week. When the latest TSA blog reported the discovery of a “lipstick stun gun” in a passenger’s carry-on bag at Burbank Bob Hope Airport (BUR), however, it started to look like a dangerous new fashion trend may be afoot.

The ingenious lipstick-tube-concealed weapon might go unnoticed during a cursory inspection in most situations. Unfortunately for the passengers involved in these most recent instances, the hidden makeup-case devices had very little chance of defeating TSA checkpoint X-ray machines. Unfortunately for everyone else, the time screeners are spending to search for and confiscate concealed weapons worthy of the Black Widow isn’t helping to reduce the already ludicrously long lines at the airport.

Of course, other passengers also attempted to smuggle a strange assortment of less clever camouflaged weapons through U.S. airports as well. This week, the TSA reported finding replica grenades at checkpoints at Ted Stevens Anchorage International Airport (ANC), Hartsfield–Jackson Atlanta International Airport (ATL), Baltimore/Washington International Thurgood Marshall Airport (BWI) and Fort Lauderdale–Hollywood International Airport (FLL). The agency also found the usual assortment of throwing knives, fighting stars and even a sharpened battle axe as well as 67 firearms, 55 of which were loaded with ammunition.

Runner-up – You’re Making it Worse

In a move that could eventually spell an end to The Worst Passenger of the Week award, Glasgow Airport (GLA) and Jet2 airlines have declared zero tolerance when it comes to disruptive passengers. The no-nonsense policy proved its merit this week when two unruly travelers at the airport allegedly injured a police officer after they became enraged due to being denied boarding on their flight to Alicante–Elche Airport (ALC).

“This type of behavior will not be tolerated under any circumstances at Glasgow Airport,” GLA spokesperson Mark Johnston explained. “Through our campus watch initiative, we work closely with our airline partners, retailers, caterers and Police Scotland to identify anyone who may cause disruption, as was the case with these two individuals.”

In this circumstance, the hypervigilance paid off. The pair reportedly attempted to make the case that they were not disruptive passengers by assaulting a police officer at the airport — thereby removing any doubt about whether they should have been allowed to board the plane.

The travel companions not only missed a planned resort getaway in Spain but were also arrested and charged with assaulting a police officer. Jet2 piled on by giving both passengers a lifetime ban from the airline.

The Winner – “I Want to Go into the Sky, I Opened the Sky Eye”

This week’s Worst Passenger of the Week was not only guilty of the usual combination of violence and absurdity with just a soupçon of childish defiance, but he also added an eerie dose of creepiness to the mix for good measure. The unnamed passenger on a China Southern Airlines flight from Wuhan Tianhe International Airport (WUH) to Harbin Taiping International Airport (HRB) was reportedly so out-of-control that crew members and fellow passengers were forced to tape the unruly flyer to his seat until the plane could make an unscheduled landing at Zhengzhou Xinzheng International Airport (CGO).

Prior to being restrained, the passenger reportedly started to yell and throw money in the aisle of the plane before he attempted to rush the flight deck without warning. According to eyewitnesses, the crew attempted unsuccessfully to calm the distressed flyer before he suddenly attempted to gain access to the cockpit. Passengers on the flight say that as the man was attempting to reach the front of the plane, he also repeatedly shouted, “Someone is trying to get me, I want to go into the sky, I opened the sky eye.”

Media outlets in China report that the passenger’s behavior was due to a “temporary mental breakdown.” Authorities are said to have allowed the man to be taken home by family members.

[Screengrab: Daily Mail]