any fellow mothers here who have done a mile run without kids?
Dec 2, 2012, 11:47 am
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2000
Location: IAH
Programs: UA 1K 2.7MM, Marriott Titanium/LT Plat, IHG Spire
Posts: 3,317
any fellow mothers here who have done a mile run without kids?
Hi ladies,
I've dropped in on this board before but I can really use your thoughts and perspectives. I have a 20 month-old daughter. My husband and I both work part-time from home, so we are constantly with her. I've only left her overnight one night because I had to travel for a board meeting.
The three of us have taken many trips together and were were supposed to go to Asia last week in part because I'm dying to return and in part to keep up my 1K status on United. My husband got a bad cold and we couldn't go. So now I'm in the situation of either losing 1K status, paying a ton to purchase elite qualifying miles, or doing a mile run myself. I chose Hong Kong and decided to give myself one day there, so I'll be gone for three nights. Her dad will be taking care of her the entire time.
I'm supposed to leave on Wednesday but I'm just consumed with guilt. What if she misses me terribly over the three days and she is traumatized? God forbid, what if the plane goes down and she has to grow up without me? I'm just worried and nervous.
I realize that I sound kind of crazy but I'm hoping that others will have faced these issues and can provide advice. People in real life (non frequent fliers) are not going to get this, so here I am.
Thank you!
I've dropped in on this board before but I can really use your thoughts and perspectives. I have a 20 month-old daughter. My husband and I both work part-time from home, so we are constantly with her. I've only left her overnight one night because I had to travel for a board meeting.
The three of us have taken many trips together and were were supposed to go to Asia last week in part because I'm dying to return and in part to keep up my 1K status on United. My husband got a bad cold and we couldn't go. So now I'm in the situation of either losing 1K status, paying a ton to purchase elite qualifying miles, or doing a mile run myself. I chose Hong Kong and decided to give myself one day there, so I'll be gone for three nights. Her dad will be taking care of her the entire time.
I'm supposed to leave on Wednesday but I'm just consumed with guilt. What if she misses me terribly over the three days and she is traumatized? God forbid, what if the plane goes down and she has to grow up without me? I'm just worried and nervous.
I realize that I sound kind of crazy but I'm hoping that others will have faced these issues and can provide advice. People in real life (non frequent fliers) are not going to get this, so here I am.
Thank you!
Dec 2, 2012, 8:13 pm
#2
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,735
Would I obsess about leaving my child motherless if I flew?
No, you're more likely to die driving to the grocery store.
Will 3 days of only Dad traumatize the kid for life?
Absolutely not. This is home with a loving parent, not an orphanage, that we're talking about.
Would I do a mileage run to HK to maintain status?
Now we're hitting the obsession point...
No, I couldn't be bothered to waste three days out of my life doing that. I love to travel, but status and upgrades aren't the reason I leave home.
(O.k. now preparing to duck down behind my flameproof suitcase
)
No, you're more likely to die driving to the grocery store.
Will 3 days of only Dad traumatize the kid for life?
Absolutely not. This is home with a loving parent, not an orphanage, that we're talking about.
Would I do a mileage run to HK to maintain status?
Now we're hitting the obsession point...
No, I couldn't be bothered to waste three days out of my life doing that. I love to travel, but status and upgrades aren't the reason I leave home.
(O.k. now preparing to duck down behind my flameproof suitcase
)
Dec 2, 2012, 8:36 pm
#3
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2000
Location: IAH
Programs: UA 1K 2.7MM, Marriott Titanium/LT Plat, IHG Spire
Posts: 3,317
Would I obsess about leaving my child motherless if I flew?
No, you're more likely to die driving to the grocery store.
Will 3 days of only Dad traumatize the kid for life?
Absolutely not. This is home with a loving parent, not an orphanage, that we're talking about.
Would I do a mileage run to HK to maintain status?
Now we're hitting the obsession point...
No, I couldn't be bothered to waste three days out of my life doing that. I love to travel, but status and upgrades aren't the reason I leave home.
(O.k. now preparing to duck down behind my flameproof suitcase)
No, you're more likely to die driving to the grocery store.
Will 3 days of only Dad traumatize the kid for life?
Absolutely not. This is home with a loving parent, not an orphanage, that we're talking about.
Would I do a mileage run to HK to maintain status?
Now we're hitting the obsession point...
No, I couldn't be bothered to waste three days out of my life doing that. I love to travel, but status and upgrades aren't the reason I leave home.
(O.k. now preparing to duck down behind my flameproof suitcase
)
Dec 3, 2012, 2:35 am
#4
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Programs: AS MVPG, BAEC, SPG, Global Entry
Posts: 119
Ah, to sip a pineapple juice while soaking in the plunge pool watching the boat traffic in the harbor . . .
Seriously, if travel is a big part of your family's lifestyle and maintaining 1K status is important to you, I'd go for it and wouldn't feel guilty. (Okay, *try* not to feel guilty!) I don't know specifics of United's program, but I assume your family will benefit from it, even if it just makes travel a bit easier on mommy and daddy.
You'll want to stay to close home when she's a teenager. That is the time for purchasing elite qualifying miles!
Dec 3, 2012, 6:14 pm
#5
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2000
Location: IAH
Programs: UA 1K 2.7MM, Marriott Titanium/LT Plat, IHG Spire
Posts: 3,317
Okay, now *I'm* thinking about doing a mileage run, and I don't do them!
Seriously, if travel is a big part of your family's lifestyle and maintaining 1K status is important to you, I'd go for it and wouldn't feel guilty. (Okay, *try* not to feel guilty!) I don't know specifics of United's program, but I assume your family will benefit from it, even if it just makes travel a bit easier on mommy and daddy.
You'll want to stay to close home when she's a teenager. That is the time for purchasing elite qualifying miles!
Seriously, if travel is a big part of your family's lifestyle and maintaining 1K status is important to you, I'd go for it and wouldn't feel guilty. (Okay, *try* not to feel guilty!) I don't know specifics of United's program, but I assume your family will benefit from it, even if it just makes travel a bit easier on mommy and daddy.
You'll want to stay to close home when she's a teenager. That is the time for purchasing elite qualifying miles!
Thanks so much! Yeah, the 1K benefits are sizable compared to what I'd have if I quit right now. I appreciate the guilt alleviation! :-)
Dec 3, 2012, 11:09 pm
#6
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,735
Stay home with a teen? Why?Teen years are when they'll want to have spare FF miles to send the teen places. I had relatives who lived an hour's flight away and was very active in various student organizations; I started flying solo at 12 (1 hour, within state) and solo transcon at 14, and I can guarantee you my parents never paid a UM fee.
Plus, teens are easier to travel with than toddlers!
Dec 4, 2012, 2:59 am
#7
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Programs: AS MVPG, BAEC, SPG, Global Entry
Posts: 119
CDTraveler: Oh, I didn't mean a teen shouldn't travel. Goodness no! Ours has been on everything from a 4 seater taking off from an unpaved runway in Alaska to the upper deck of a 747 and everything in between, and is probably the best traveler in the family. It sounds like JNelson113 Junior is being raised the same way. 
Let me clarify: Because of the endless socializing during the teenage years, there are periods of time when I actively minimize being away from home. I just feel the need to keep my ear to the ground to make sure I know what they're up to (or ha ha, *think* they're going to be up to!) This is when I'd think twice about making a mileage run, not when they are sweet, innocent little toddlers.
Let me clarify: Because of the endless socializing during the teenage years, there are periods of time when I actively minimize being away from home. I just feel the need to keep my ear to the ground to make sure I know what they're up to (or ha ha, *think* they're going to be up to!) This is when I'd think twice about making a mileage run, not when they are sweet, innocent little toddlers.
Dec 4, 2012, 8:21 am
#8
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: VA base, Midatlantic travel
Programs: HH Diamond, Marr Plat, Natl Elite, AMEX Plat, AA PP
Posts: 126
Hi ladies,
I'm supposed to leave on Wednesday but I'm just consumed with guilt.
Let it go, a 3 day trip without your child will make you a better mom in the long run.
What if she misses me terribly over the three days and she is traumatized?
Um really? Is her dad that awful and incompetent? Reframe: You are giving your daughter and her father the gift of time alone to develop their own relationship while you relax and come home refreshed.
God forbid, what if the plane goes down and she has to grow up without me?
More likely to die on the way to the grocery store.
I'm supposed to leave on Wednesday but I'm just consumed with guilt.
Let it go, a 3 day trip without your child will make you a better mom in the long run.
What if she misses me terribly over the three days and she is traumatized?
Um really? Is her dad that awful and incompetent? Reframe: You are giving your daughter and her father the gift of time alone to develop their own relationship while you relax and come home refreshed.
God forbid, what if the plane goes down and she has to grow up without me?
More likely to die on the way to the grocery store.
I travel quite a bit for work now, my kids love to travel and we all love to travel together. I miss them, but I don't feel guilty. Best wishes.
Dec 4, 2012, 2:42 pm
#9
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: IAD
Programs: No Loyalty to any airline
Posts: 2,378
Go. From one who did a MR to Osaka overnight to make 1K, I totally understand this. If you travel a lot, it's worth the benefits.
Throw away the "what ifs" and enjoy your three days for yourself. You will come back and probably find your daughter will forget you were even gone. I have found my children actually enjoy it many times when I'm gone!
Throw away the "what ifs" and enjoy your three days for yourself. You will come back and probably find your daughter will forget you were even gone. I have found my children actually enjoy it many times when I'm gone!
Dec 5, 2012, 2:16 pm
#10
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2000
Location: IAH
Programs: UA 1K 2.7MM, Marriott Titanium/LT Plat, IHG Spire
Posts: 3,317
Thank you SO much, everyone! Your support definitely helped me make the decision to go. Unfortunately my plane from ORD-HKG has gone out of service and we're waiting for a new one, but at least I'll have one full day in Hong Kong (assuming all goes smoothly from here on out). I'll update once more when I get back. :-) Happy travels, all!
Dec 9, 2012, 8:07 am
#12
Original Poster
Join Date: May 2000
Location: IAH
Programs: UA 1K 2.7MM, Marriott Titanium/LT Plat, IHG Spire
Posts: 3,317
Everyone,
Thank you so much for your support and encouragement! It was one thing for my husband to support my going; it was another to have fellow mothers support this and tell me that I was not selfish. This turned out to be a win/win for all. My daughter had a great time hanging with her dad and playing with the neighbor kids, and as a bonus my husband even taught her to sleep through the night! Yeah! He said that she missed me and asked for me occasionally but when he told her that I would be back soon she accepted this and was fine. She never cried. On my end, I had a simply marvelous time in Hong Kong . . . just being there and looking at that magnificent view was just heavenly, as well as enjoying the wonderful experience of staying at the Intercontinental. In short, this was such a success that we've decided to make this an annual trip for me.
Thank you again, everyone!
Thank you so much for your support and encouragement! It was one thing for my husband to support my going; it was another to have fellow mothers support this and tell me that I was not selfish. This turned out to be a win/win for all. My daughter had a great time hanging with her dad and playing with the neighbor kids, and as a bonus my husband even taught her to sleep through the night! Yeah! He said that she missed me and asked for me occasionally but when he told her that I would be back soon she accepted this and was fine. She never cried. On my end, I had a simply marvelous time in Hong Kong . . . just being there and looking at that magnificent view was just heavenly, as well as enjoying the wonderful experience of staying at the Intercontinental. In short, this was such a success that we've decided to make this an annual trip for me.
Thank you again, everyone!
Dec 12, 2012, 8:54 pm
#14
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: DTW
Programs: DL DM
Posts: 123
Glad you did it
I'm late to the party, I know, but I've done MR's back in the day before I had an extremely large amount of travel. Plus, I wanted to chime in and say that I've had a very travel intensive job for my children's entire lives. They're now 8 and 10 and I've been a single mom with 100% custody for 4 years traveling around 150-200k a year (a lot of international, so it's not like I'm at 95% travel, I'm gone 1-2 days a week on average). They're just fine, very well adjusted, and in fact they themselves have asked to go on a MR to reach a higher status (they do fly quite a bit). Anyhow the point is, sometimes it's hard to remember to take care of yourself when you're a mom, and you should definitely take whatever you need to be refreshed - a happy mom is always a good thing for kids. I know if I *didn't* have a job that required travel, working from home I would go completely insane without a change of scenery and adult contact. Good for you!
I'm late to the party, I know, but I've done MR's back in the day before I had an extremely large amount of travel. Plus, I wanted to chime in and say that I've had a very travel intensive job for my children's entire lives. They're now 8 and 10 and I've been a single mom with 100% custody for 4 years traveling around 150-200k a year (a lot of international, so it's not like I'm at 95% travel, I'm gone 1-2 days a week on average). They're just fine, very well adjusted, and in fact they themselves have asked to go on a MR to reach a higher status (they do fly quite a bit). Anyhow the point is, sometimes it's hard to remember to take care of yourself when you're a mom, and you should definitely take whatever you need to be refreshed - a happy mom is always a good thing for kids. I know if I *didn't* have a job that required travel, working from home I would go completely insane without a change of scenery and adult contact. Good for you!