Son of BEHEMOTH
 

Son of BEHEMOTH

So it begins – the Son Of BEHEMOTH. This is a different sort of journey for me. Obviously the mechanism is the same – a giant metal tube full of wires, champagne and the little people but this is for me a dramatically different journey. BEHEMOTH was the end of the beginning – on that journey I achieved top tier status with AA and HHonors so on SOB I will be travelling as a passenger with status already – rose petals will be strewn before me as I walk and I will be upgraded to suites in every hotel with free flowing champagne at every stage of the journey.

But it keeps coming back to that word – journey. What exactly is a journey? It has many names and some of my favourites are below

Arabic: سَفْرَه، رِحْلَه
Chinese (Simplified): 旅程
Chinese (Traditional): 旅程
Dutch: reis
Estonian: teekond
Finnish: matka
Greek: ταξίδι, διαδρομή
Hungarian: út; utazás
Icelandic: ferðalag
Indonesian: perjalanan
Italian: viaggio
Japanese: 旅行
Korean: 여행
Latvian: brauciens; ceļojums
Lithuanian: kelionė
Polish: podróż
Romanian: călă¬torie
Russian: поездка; путешествие
Slovak: cesta
Slovenian: potovanje
Spanish: viaje

So many name really reflect the complexity of what a journey is. It is however easily defined in the dictionary:

For me though the key definition above is passage or progress from one stage to another. My travels since I changed jobs in May 2006 have been “lumpy” a smallish number of big trips around the world or around Asia. A lot of flights and a lot of miles but not a sequence of recurrent events. As such much of the travel has been about an exploration of the experience of the journey rather than just a distance travelled.

But now on some levels I had moved beyond that. At the conclusion of BEHEMOTH I was “an experienced traveller” so the wonder had left me – not to bring me to a state of being jaded with travel – but there was not as much to experience as new. That in a way disappointed me in planning SOB. If the wonder and excitement was gone then was there a point to the journey and in that sense I do mean the traverse form point A to point B – was it simply going to become that to me. What journey can I make from this travel? What is there new that I can experience aside from simply a different place to eat and sleep? After having moved from journeyer to traveller what can I bring new to this trip?

To my joy there were two answers to this question. Firstly the journey to the journey itself was more complex than a cryptex wrapped in an enigma hidden in a room you can only find when you really need it (you all now my love of the Potter books so you will excuse me that). The second answer was the most obvious one and to my discredit I really should have spotted this first. I am embarking on this journey as a statused traveller – so this time I actually get the benefits that I “worked so hard” to achieve.

So the journey begins but the starting point is not the journey – but the journey to the journey itself…

Apologies for the delay in updating - I lost my laptop and have not been able o write up more of the report - hope to get laptop today so will start writing then...

I am curious to read your report next year "Back to Reality - My First Year as AA EXP"... Even if you had achieved your status on a premium carrier you would have been disappointed. I just finished my *A CRTW and I have listed the *G benefits that I have received - it was something next to nothing. And *G on Lufthansa requires up to 130,000 miles flown...

Updates coming - I now have my laptop and have some elements posted on AFF - just need to make some edits to the underlying text before posting here - I updated them during posting to AFF so need to remember them...

Tip, simply reply to your posts on AFF with [QUOTE USER] button, then lop the tags off the front and tail of the text in the editor. Copy all, then past into a new post here. ;)

The journey to the journey

You may know by now that I don’t like to make things easy on myself :) The story of the Next DONE4 Planning thread can be found here . On a day to day basis almost the routing changed as things intersected and shaped the journey. I had initially envisioned SOB as in fact a longer journey than BEHEMOTH. The initial routing was:

syd-nrt-hkg-sin-nrt-dfw-lax-jfk-bgi-lgw-pfo,lca-lhr-hkg-syd-mel-syd

And before the naysayers jump in and critique the routing for being dim and unnecessary – I know. There is an element of extravagance and mileage running and just doing it because I could. If you don’t like it – go and close down the Mileage Running forum (sorry for being a bit tetchy but during the BEHEMOTH Trip Report a few people jumped in and criticised the routing – thanks to all who stepped in a defended me on that :)).

Anyway after the debacle in BGI last time I decided to cut BGI from the trip and also try to get the trip to 16 segments so it could be an Eticket. A few refinements later and then the bigger spanner is thrown into the works as I am asked at relatively short notice to go to PVG for “some days”. At the same time I am leaning against routing to HKG via NRT but unfortunately that first flight can’t be changed without reworking the whole thing. At the same time mrssimongr suggests that we go to DRW for a weekend after I get back from the trip so I add that to the ticket instead of BNE (although due to SWP restrictions I still actually have to fly via BNE). So a final routing is decided

syd-nrt-hkg-pvg-hkg-nrt-dfw-lga,jfk-lhr-lca-lhr-hkg-syd-bne-drw-syd

What stuns me most is that I now class this as a simple trip – but when I look at it – how on earth can one consider this simple?????

For personal reasons as well it becomes more important than ever for me to take my diversion to Cyprus. I am not a person to regret my prior actions. When I left the UK in 2000 I turned to go through security knowing that part of my life was over but have never regretted it – regrets serve no person other than to make you question the decisions that you make – you make the decisions and you have to live with the outcomes – I choose not to use the word consequences as that would imply only bad comes from the decisions you make. As such I have not regretted being so far from my family in the UK as I have made a positive decision with my wife that Oz is the place that we will live. However this is one time that I am very grateful that I can be there with my family.

Anyhoo – a little less melancholy – I haven’t even mentioned a G&T yet – you must be wondering if this is truly me writing this! In parallel to my journey (I will try and not to overuse that – I sort of promise) planning, as a result of the baggage trauma of BEHEMOTH I have started “The Great Hand Luggage Challenge” and intend to travel this entire 3½ week trip with just hand luggage – a garment bag and a rollaboard! Now to give you some context to this on the BEHEMOTH I travelled (theoretically only of course given the luggage delays ;)) with a large Samsonite case (weighted in at 31.9KG at LGW), large leather garment bag (with 4 suits after purchases in LON), laptop bag and 20in rollaboard. Now one might consider this unnecessary on a normal trip and perhaps I might accept some criticism in that regard – perhaps I didn’t need the 4 plug multi bar adapater, corkscrew, two pairs of black oxfords, casual shoes, second casual shoes, running shoes, speaker system for the iPod, 5 kg of lead soldiers that I brought back from the UK that belonged to me when I was young and a 6 casual shirts, four pairs of casual trousers, three oompa loompas and a Xenoperdix obscuratus in a Pyrus amygdaliformis – my mother was an Akela and I have been indoctrinated that one should always be prepared – perhaps being prepared for The Day After Tomorrow is a trifle excessive.

As I prepare for this trip we really cut to the bone – imagine if you will this great episode of the Simpsons with Homer as the football coach slowly cutting garments and accessories from the trip – I look longingly at the pile of other Polo Ralph Lauren polo shirts that I am leaving behind and wonder if I will be able to cope with just three… The hardest part of the preparation and planning for the trip is knowing that I wont be buying some of the gifts that I would normally purchase. I know that hard core travellers don’t buy gifts for people (well perhaps other than Jonnie Walker as bribes for Chinese government officials and the Horn Rimmed Glasses Guy in Heroes who used to buy a teddy bear every time he “went overseas” which was in fact a euphemism for disappearing on some job for the Company… I am digressing again aren’t I?)

So finally after a hint of traverse within the route to the journey (see not overusing the [ b ] tags on journey this time we are set SOB can begin and with it a new chapter in the Journeyer’s travels.

Journey – SYD-NRT
Flight no. – QF21
Class – Business
Seat – 3K

I am flying out on APEC weekend – whatever that means. What it does mean is a public holiday on the Friday before my Saturday night flight to Tokyo. I spend some time preparing my packing for the trip given the luggage constraints but actually have a relaxing day with mrssimongr – working on a few last things for the house and planning for our trip when I get home. There is more than a few minutes of panic at home as my Moleskine notebook that I use for trip reports has vanished :eek: so we troop off to the store to get a replacement (it doesn’t feel the same though as it just doesn’t seem right to be taking SOB notes in a book without the BEHEMOTH).

[aside-ramble]

I guess at this point I can take a minute to better elucidate what travel means to me (here he goes again) and why certain things make the experience more than just a journey. When writing my first trip report I just grabbed a $5 notebook – the same as I used for my normal work notes. But at the commencement of the BEHEMOTHI bought myself a Moleskine notebook. Obviously a notebook is just a sheaf of paper tied together. But as you can see from how I write and how I travel the feel of what I do is almost as important as the actions themselves. I can feel the warmth of the notebook as I write and the feeling of putting the band back on the book makes the experience of writing seem more than just an accountant exploring his ego and more like a writer.

[/aside-ramble]

Fortunately as I pack the last few things and tidy the bedroom before I leave I find my old Moleskine on the floor next to the bed. This is a relief and a nice lift before I take my bags downstairs to begin the journey. The car arrives on schedule and I take my two small bags and drop them in the boot/trunk of the car and finally (for you and for me) it begins!

With it being APEC weekend I am expecting terrible traffic on the way to the Airport so have booked a slightly earlier than normal car but it is only 45 minutes from my house to the F lounge! The somewhat belligerent check in staff is happy to check me in and gives me my SYD-NRT and NRT-HKG boarding passes and after some prompting gives me the Epass for express immigration and security. I know it sounds petty having only had two outbounds from SYD as a either an F Pax or an OWE – but I am little disappointed about this new higher level of service – no documents have been pre-prepared for me as F (obviously not a benefit as OWE) and the little chaps in the check in area seem to just ignore me – all it seems is that it is just a walled off area. I know I joked about rose petals and champagne but something more than a grunt might be nice.

Anyway, as there is no-one in the main immigration queue I pocket the epass for a rainy day and go to a regular counter. I am quizzed on my less than direct routing to HKG but am waved through after some muttering about how I like to fly and am advised not to say that it is nicer up the front…

The first test of my hand luggage challenge is security and not a word is said and no bags are weighed – all good so far. Security is painless thankfully and I am quickly into the F lounge with no issues at all. I am quickly able to confirm that the AFL is being shown in the lounge although in retrospect I wish it wasn’t given the Swan’s performance :(

I enjoy the Tapas plate of some salt cod fitters (super yum), [non]-spicy meatballs (yum), interesting octopus (not normally a choice for me but given a punt and surprisingly nice) and some prosciuttio (which I pass on at this point). This shortly followed by some very spicy calamari which is being brought round a la the SIN F lounge I experienced. Obviously this all being washed down with some Veuve initially and subsequently with some Cape Mentelle (I am really enjoying this visit to the lounge).

I am enjoying a somewhat topsy turvy game with it fairly balanced but with still almost a full half to go when sadly the F lounge needs to give way to a J seat and I am off to board my first QF A330 flight. I am struck on boarding by the lack of two door boarding that we would get at HKG – it really does devalue the J experience when you have to board with the hoipolloi

As I take my window seat (preferred option on night flights) I look around at the options of seat buddy that I could have had and roll my eyes at the 50+ dumpy woman that I will actually be sat next to. Now I know I will take some heat for that – it’s just it would be nice just once to be sat next to a chatty attractive woman given I dont get to travel much with mrssimongr

As I take a look around the cabin I notice some subtle differences to other airbuses that I have been on. Obviously this is a newer aircraft and the flow of curves around the cabin is definitely different to other aircraft. The Skybed also feels different. There seems to be a large lump in my lower back and the plastic of the seat in front looks lighter. They also seem noisier – and as people are spending much time adjusting them BEFORE take off it makes the whole thing just seem loud on board.

The option of “dining later” seems to be causing trouble for some pax – but I revert to a normal mode of asking for a nice cold beer shortly after take off (rather than a G&T as it is a little outside of the G&T window (on reflection this entire trip seems a little light on G&Ts :eek: ).

We are a little delayed taking off due to the departure of the Evil Overlord (George Bush) on Air Force 1 and 2. Disappointingly we get slightly divergent messages from the cabin crew and the flight deck – a little thing but also a little unnecessary.

I am again asleep on take off and for the first 45 mins of the flight – but strangely I find that drinks are still not being served and a pre-dinner drink is not forthcoming! I foolishly try the AVOiD only to be disappointed again :( The system is dead for the cabin for the first two hours (remember this is a 9:50PM flight out of SYD). I determine that the problem with the system is that it takes time to get going and progressively becomes stable with the cabin row by row and then seat by seat – sadly my seat is the last cab off the rank – and I just don’t have the patience to wait for it to catch up so revert to laptop TV…

Dinner is a fairly unappetising affair starting with an artichoke salad and a veal pie. The veal pie is a nice concept – a traditional footy pie with ketchup/tomato sauce on top - but have you ever tried eating a pie that is in a small ramekin on a plane with airline cutlery? Obviously some of you will have but for the purposes of this story let’s just assume that my eating failings are an enlightening experience for you

A couple of glasses of nice shiraz and I am off to Bedfordshire. Now here is the kicker – the Skybed actually feels a little longer. It might be totally psychological but I do manage to crash out quite well :) I think I get maybe 5 – 6 hours sleep so I view that as a net win.

I wake and immediately given a scorching hot towel and asked if I want breakfast – but am at least given the chance to go to the bathroom before I have to commit to breakfast. I am not normally great a having breakfast straight after waking – I am more of a brunch person. I only manage to pick at breakfast and realise that if I was more in the mood it would be quite nice – soft scrambled egg, smoked salmon and leaf tea.

As we begin our descent the CSM brings me a A$50 voucher for onboard duty free – a darn sight more useful to me than the A$300 voucher I got previously for failed AVOiD – but that was only redeemable against other flights…

I repack my bag and begin my focus on NRT and the JL F lounge, deciding whether to lounge hop and switching my seat on the next flight – I mean c’mon 17A??? DYKWIA???? ;)

The Conrad Hong Kong

This is my first stay at a hotel when I have some real hotel status and we are certainly talking Chalk and Cheese (mmmmm….. cheese…) in my check in experience.

At the main check in desk I am whisked up to the 59th Floor Executive Lounge for check in. I am not handed off to some other flunky but dealt with by the same person from entry to room. This may not seem a big deal to some people but I do sometimes get frustrated with being overserviced being passed around to more senior people. I just wan t a quick smooth check in service.

No questions are raised or changes to rates as a result of my change in stay due to the impending Shanghai side trip. I had expected at least a rate change due to the pair of shorter stays. The HHonors Diamond benefits are great, spelled out at check in and include:

- Executive lounge access and evening cocktails
- Harbour view with larger room
- Free wireless internet in the Exec lounge
- 4 shirts pressed for free

The in-room experience is also quite enhanced by having a massive room, chocolates and jasmine tea brought up to me a few mins after I get to the room. Overall very nice.

Not long after check-in and freshening up I head to the Exec Lounge to catch up with family on msn whilst sipping champagne. OK – I admit it – this isn’t the hardest part of the job.

I have a quick day in the office on Monday and my jacket is relegated to a cupboard in the office whilst I go to Shanghai due to the very, very warm temperatures here in HKG. The next few days are planned and we actually realise that I only need to be in PVG until Monday at the latest. What this does mean is another trip with lots of moving around again – something I am getting a little bored of.

Having not spent any time in PVG before and knowing that I will be back in HKG in November I decide to fly back to HKG on the Monday and spend a full weekend in PVG. It is a little bit of a luxury as it will wipe out half a day’s work but I don’t fancy spending three weeks travelling every weekend.

Monday evening I am back in lounge for further excellent service – they already know my drink!!!! As I get back to the room I intercept the turn down service (something I really don’t need as a business traveller who leaves at 8AM and gets back at 7PM and whose room doesn’t change after the first clean in the morning) and am handed a Conrad Bear :) At least I have a gift for Dog2 now ;)

I am pretty exhausted so I am in bed by 9:30PM and set my alarm for 5AM – forgetting that the alarm is set to Sydney time so after my 3AM wake up I go back to bed for a little longer.

On check out I make a further change to my booking and grab a cab to the train station intending to get the train to the airport. In the past I have averaged HK$380 for the ride to/from the airport. In the cab the driver asked if I already had a ticket to the airport which I said no to. He then offered 25 mins and HK$260 to the airport – which sounded fine. I was taken through the “back streets” of Hong Kong and past many places I had never seen but on schedule and on the money I made it to the airport. It would have been great if one of my pens had not escaped into the cab :(

Great trip report so far.^ Waiting for the rest...

Journey – HKG-PVG
Flight no. – CX367
Class – Business
Seat – 17A 16D

The F check in at HKG is a joy as ever. I ask them to change the dates of my flights next week and they advise that they will get the lounge to let me know if it has been arranged. In addition I am advised to use the Pier lounge as that is closer to the gate. A nice touch and a step up from the QF F check in approach (admittedly they couldn’t give me a choice but I walk away from this check in feeling special rather than disappointed).

At exit immigration I use the HKIA FV card again for a speedy exit. One strange thing is that they have to record my details manually but interestingly the immigration staff make the other pax wait until my details have been taken so that I am not slowed down at all :)

It is still quite early – well very early – so it is onto the serftymobile and into the lounge. I am informed at entry to the lounge that they are happy to make the change to my flights but as they are not the ticket issuer they will have to charge me HK$300 for the benefit… I decide it might be better to call the EXP desk and get them to make the change ;)

After a mere 10 seconds seated in the lounge the shopkeeper arrives and offers me my choice of drinks. Now I hope you are both seated and not holding anything fragile such as expensive crockery, a small child or perhaps the still beating heart of your latest victim (just watched an episode of [url=http://www.tvrage.com/dexter]Dexter[/url)) but, phew this is actually hard to type, I actually ordered an English Breakfast Tea… no champagne, no G&T, not even a crisp cold refreshing draft Asahi (mmmm Asahi. Admittedly it IS 7AM and I am planning to work on the flight (more on that later) but still – I am as shocked as you are at this despicable behaviour – I can sense a need to compensate with either a hair shirt or a large G&T when I get to PVG.

But with my EBT in hand I hook up Skype and call mrssimongr who is sadly not well but is at least taking a couple of days off. After that call it is onto the EXP desk to change flights and ticket my AAward for next year.

[aside]

This has been a mammoth task trying to get two RTW tickets in J on the following routing syd-jfk-lhr-lca-syd – not easy by any stretch of the imagination but I have at least managed to get syd-jfk-lhr-lca-hkg in J on exactly the dates I wanted. I think that is best I can hope for. Now just to bleat on another pet topic – the wonderful world of the AAdvantage program. This AAward cost me 300K AAdvantage miles and US$440 in taxes. A similar award if I had booked through QFF would have been over 500K points and probably in excess of $1500 in taxes. As much as I bemoan that few months without F lounge access and not being second from the top of the queue for points upgrades – you just can not argue with those economics, but I know there are those that will ;)

[/aside]

The CS staff makes the change but then has to “check with tariff” to see if any fee applies – I sigh and wait for the confirmation of no fee that takes 5 mins. The CS staff is good though – he apologises for not knowing specifically the rules and being able to answer that immediately and thanks me for all the miles I am putting to the AA program. Again a small but subtle level of quality in the service. Good work.

Just before boarding is called I duck into the Tumi store to grab a Tumi passport holder (I think it is the underwear next ;)).

Boarding is painless and the aircraft is the regional config which is ok but not great. Certainly better than Club Europe but this aint no Skybed (hmm think I might need a review of the various J class configurations that I have been flying in recently. Although we board on time we are left waiting for the resolution of a “small mechanical problem”. I am reminded of my last HKG-China flight when we flew around HKG for a couple of hours before landing back at HKG for an aircraft change…

I decide to skip the breakfast having eaten in the lounge and I just grab some tea and get on with some work. I am then (almost literally) struck by the worst recliner on record. Now this only a 2 hour flight and is flying at a reasonable time out of HKG and this person obviously has not just gotten off a connecting flight so I just can not see the need for sleep. It actually turns out that the seat is a little faulty and it allows him to recline even further than standard – so far in fact that I can’t even open my laptop fully – and this is only a small 12.1” laptop.

I do however manage to get an hour or so of work done and am amazed that the recliner doesn’t move for the entire flight. I am pretty fed up as we start the commencement of the descent into PVG and the first indications of landing are announced. I then get pretty bloody annoyed when the recliner gets up and leaves his seat fully reclined whilst he goes off to the bathroom – knowing that they have announced the descent. I ask the cabin crew to raise the seat and even they are amazed at how far it has reclined. Then he comes back and slams the seat back into a full recline!!!!! It is only 30 seconds later that the Captain requests for all seats to be put upright and it takes a couple of prods from the cabin crew to get sleeping beauty to actually sit up. Altogether this was a pretty uncomfortable flight :(

I normally quite enjoy my CX and to be getting off thoroughly depressed is a real shame. At least on my way back I wont be going into the office and can actually enjoy the flight – even if it is regional configuration.

The Shanghai Hilton

The joy of hand luggage only strikes again as I breeze through PVG airport and straight into the waiting hotel car (mind you it is only a Toyota this time rather than the Lexus I had last time) and am pretty much in the hotel within an hour of landing.

At the Hilton I am met at the door and escorted to the Exec Lounge check in which is actually in the lobby as the Exec floor is being refurbished. I am welcomed by the Manager and there is a lot of fuss about how I am on the 8th floor away from the renovation noise. I keep mentioning the great room I had last time that had been refurbished but they just nod and smile without commenting on that. I realise why when I get to the dingy small dismal unrefurbished room that has been allocated to me. Quite frankly after the flight and the thought of being in Shanghai by myself for a week in this room I am not feeling overly generous when I get back to the lobby to find out what they can do to improve this.

I am told they can not do anything tonight but will move me the next day. It is ok – just not a particularly good way to start my PVG visit. After a sandwich in the hotel my day is made worse by a shocking cab ride to the office which I survive twice as I realise I have left my Chinese cash in the hotel! Mind you although I have to drive twice to the office the cab ride is still only A$9!!!

My evening is pretty quiet as I am quite tired but I have a horrendous night’s sleep – maybe one or two too many glasses of red from the complementary bottle of wine… I did make it to the Exec Lounge bar which takes over the rooftop bar from 6pm to 8pm which is ok. It is however lessened as a large Dutch man is lecturing the staff on how to pour some Vodka and lime drink in quite a demeaning way. It is also a little annoying (but obviously culturally acceptable) that they allow smoking in the lounge.

The next morning I am a little tired from the restless sleep but thankfully I have no problems with the cab this time. I have an excellent banquet style lunch with the Shanghai finance team – some not-Tofu which is surprisingly lovely.

When I get back to the hotel my new room is ok – not refurbished but very large and with some great views of Shanghai. The rooms have overall been a real downer here – hopefully they will be back up to standard when I come back in 2008.

Dinner is at the Bund that evening with the Finance Team. It is amusing that they take me to a western restaurant for dinner (I paid mind you) called Luna. I guess for the Chinese staff this quite an exotic venue :)

The next morning is a little less smooth as the cab gets lost on the way to the office and I then realise I have been mis-reading the map quite badly as well – altogether a lot more shaky.

I am finding PVG quiet difficult as a non-Chinese speaking single traveller. Coupled with the tiredness that is following this trip I have a quiet night in the hotel again – not the most fun way to spent a Friday night :(

Saturday morning is spent relaxing in the hotel as again I have a restless night. I spend a good while using Skype to speak to mrssimongr about the granite selection for our new kitchen – something I am actually a little sad to be missing. I am just about to set off for the Bund to actually do some sightseeing when the heavens open – I have a feeling that PVG really doesn’t like!

The rains do clear so it’s straight into a cab and down to the Bund. I finally feel like I am getting to experience something on an Asia trip for once. There have been just too many trips that have been spent transiting to other parts of Asia that I feel like I haven’t really visited Asia yet – and that was a driver for taking this job!

As I am al little later getting down to the Bund I just stroll and soak in the atmosphere and the buildings. There are some truly stunning late 19th Century colonial buildings along the river. I also have a chance to reflect on China as a concept (bear with me for a few minutes on this). We have known through school and the news that China is a big country with a big population but I don’t think I have really understood the meaning of that. I look around Shanghai – a city of 20 million people – that is as much as the whole population of Australia and this is just one city of many. The scale is unimaginable but here I am trying to imagine it. Even looking around this small speck of a part of a city there is a massive range of wealth, circumstances and structure. The lives of the ordinary people are just so different. Just watching the store and restaurant owners how they go about their lives is really as alien as you expect it to be. It is almost disconcerting to be here – I really realise how far outside of my traditional experience as I have ever been. The more I think about it (you have a lot of time to think about things when travelling alone – perhaps too much time given I am up to page 14 of notes on this trip report and am only up to flight three…) the more you think about the traditional way we view the world is going to be thrown off balance – western cultures are just overwhelmed by the volume of people in the second world. Who would have thought 40 years ago that the world would be seized not in battle but simply through weight of numbers?

I stroll back up the bund away from my reverie and actually hail a cab. Now this may not sound like a big deal but this is officially the first cab that I have hailed for myself in China! As I ride back to the hotel I am quite proud of myself. Although I have flown a lot I would not say that I have travelled a great deal – my experiences over the past year are very much hotels and cabs and offices rather than places (with the little exception of my four glorious trips to NYC). With the trip this afternoon I really feel like I have moved a little closer to actually experiencing China rather than just being there.

A quiet evening in again (I should really try and get out more to restaurants by myself next time) and a relatively early start. A smooth check out process is interrupted as I am called back by housekeeping to retrieve my phone and charger that I left in the room – good customer service there :) The journey to the airport is much enhanced by the Audi A6 this time – overall a delightful experience. There is a lot of cloud/smog around so I am relieved that the airport is all clear when I get there.

At check in I am asked if I want to move to the earlier flight – which when they indicate is KA, I politely decline. I am allocated seat 1K which I find a little unusual given the regional configuration. After a rather slow exit immigration process I make my way down to the lounge level and try to get in the JL lounge that is closest to the gate only to be refused entry as I am not on CX metal – or so I am told! There doesn’t seem to be much point arguing this with the lounge staff and stroll up to the KA lounge – which is not great but has the distinction of being at the absolute other end of the airport.

Journey – PVG-HKG
Flight no. – CX367
Class – Business
Seat – 1K

I hook up the free wi-fi in the KA lounge (an improvement over the prior visit), grab a cold beer and some neat little sandwiches. It is not long before we are approaching boarding and given the massive walk to the gate I leave a little early – which is a good move as it takes at least 20 mins to walk – this is the point at which I somewhat regret the hand luggage only rules…

Finally I am on board and I almost collapse with shock. This is not a regional config CX aircraft – it is a three class A330 – so my 1K is in fact a First class seat!!!! Fully flat beds on a 2 hour flight :) I am so looking forward to this flight that I wish it was a little longer in fact.

I opt for the asian meal which is beef in black bean with rice and accompanied by a very good Australian Shiraz. Although this is a long haul aircraft they only play the regional IFE which is a little disappointing as it is just TV shows without any movies of note. I grab a bit of Laptop TV and then watch an episode of Top Gear which has me almost in tears of laughter – Jeremy Clarkson is really just the greatest!

The staff are great and attentive but they do disappear quite early in the flight along with the shiraz ;) The Haggen Daas is again as hard as rock but does eventually melt enough to be eaten.

The flight is over almost before it has begun and we have another cloudy/polluted descent into HKG – I am really looking forward to the day I can see blue sky and the sun in HKG. After landing I have another huge walk to immigration (I estimate 6 moving walkways) but at immigration the HKIA FV card proves to be invaluable. I am planning to grab the train to Central again but have buried my HK$ in my bag somewhere and am not having luck finding it so it is off to the ATM again – I am a little reticent about that as I don’t have many days left in HKG and I don’t want to be left with too much currency for once. The train I is a breeze again and this time I take a cab to the hotel which is much easier. I do note though that another Cross pen has bitten the dust on the aircraft – that’s two for the trip so I think I really need a pen holder!

The Conrad Hong Kong - Redux

At the Conrad I am again whisked up to the 59th Floor for check in – but this time not quite as many Exec benefits – no free pressing for a start. The room is ok but considerably smaller than my last room and no jasmine tea on arrival :(

Feeling more adventurous and being on a bit of a mission I take my first trip to the Wan Chai Computer centre – an absolute geek Mecca :) Due to my onward journeys and the hand luggage only constraints I actually buy nothing – on this trip. Next time when I am not constrained by so many factors I might be in a little bit of trouble ;)

Due to the movement of work around to accommodate the work in Shanghai I have a productive few days in the HKG office – although it is nothing I couldn’t have done in Sydney (and perhaps more easily as well) but the option of going back to Oz was not an option – one of the drivers for SOB was to combine a trip to Asia and the US on one flight cost. Over the next few days I have some terrible night’s sleep so I am actually completely exhausted by the end of the trip.

Being more familiar with the stores around the office I decide to grab a pair of Tag Heuer sunglasses that I have had my eye on in Sydney for a while and splurge to put in prescription lenses. The amazing thing is that I had Googled for these glasses a couple of times and could not find any stockists – except for the opticians in our building :)

The lounge in the Conrad is a great improvement over the PVG Hilton but the timing is a little off. The lounge opens 5pm – 7pm. Given my average day finishes at about 5:15 – 5:30 (it starts at 6AM with the overnight emails from the US) and with some travel time back to the hotel and dumping my gear I almost miss the lounge a couple of times – almost that is ;)

The three days in HKG both fly and drag at the same time. I really want to be in NYC at this point so that I am in theory on my way home and also able to buy a new iPod Touch

As I have a early PM flight to NRT I work in the hotel until about midday as I have a heap of stuff that just needs to be emailed out. Checking out is a smooth process and in fact the room service bills looks a little light. I decide on the train to the airport and the train to Central from the hotel. Again due to the massive walks between the hotel and Admiralty and at Central – I should really have gone with the cab to Central option – you live and learn.

This is my first Central to Airport routing and am very pleased when the train brings you out level with the concourse – although not entirely level with the JL check in area. I do however manage to find the JL check in desk and am quickly checked in. I haven’t pre-selected my seat for the JL flight and I am little further back than I would expect as a OWE. I am directed to the Sakura lounge which I thank them for knowing that I am off to the Wing ;) I still have no checked luggage and wander to security – where I am in fact turned back for having two bags???? ...??? This didn’t happen last week… I am told to go back to the check in desk and arrange for two bags with the check in staff – all very strange compared to what happened last week. I then realise that a little chap put some little tag on one of my bags last week and this must be what is meant by pre-arranging it with the airline. JL’s process is a little more labour intensive and I am escorted back to security by a member of staff.

Second time lucky I am through to immigration where my favourite new card – the HKIAFV – glides me through immigration, in fact I am sent to the HKG Nationals queue. The only annoyance is that the JL check in is at the opposite end of the terminal from the Wing (very close to the QF/BA Lounge actually) so it is a long walk to get my glass of Moet – but I survived. Over lunch I catch up on emails and get a further update on Tscharke’s quest for EXP. Sadly I think all hope is lost for him now :( although it’s not over until the Rubenesque lady sings.

After a relaxing couple of Moets it is time to find gate 11. As I head down to the departures area and check the boards I am furious to see that Gate 11 has been changed to Gate 40!!! Furious that is until I actually recheck my BP and see that I am in seat 11 rather than gate 11. I think this is an indication of things to come for the rest of the journey – now that I have crossed the threshold of two weeks (almost) I think I am focussed too much on the next 2 – 3 flights rather than the flights I am taking. Not a good thing to not have “your head in the game”…

So it is off to the serftymobile (underground people mover) and Gate 40. I actually have a few minutes before is called so I duck up to the Sakura lounge which is 2 minutes from Gate 40. It is not very inspiring – like a more open version of the BA/QF lounge. There is no separate F lounge – just a screened off F area which has no different food or drink that I can see – just a lot less people. I am not sure as a OWE whether I am entitled to use this section but as I am only going to be here 10 minutes there is not much point in even trying. I have just enough time for a quick call home and then it is off to my first JL flight!!!

Journey – HKG-NRT
Flight no. – JL732
Class – Business
Seat – 11A

On board the hard product is a little disappointing – I recognise this is a semi regional product so it should compare to the Dreamtime seats I have on the BNE-DRW flight. This is however a three class 747 and it just looks old and tired. The seats are cradle seats and the pitch is less than I would get on a US Transcon on AA.

I fall asleep on take off (completely not connected to the Moet in the Wing) and wake 20 minutes into the flight. It is interesting to note that no pre-take off drinks were offered (well before I fell asleep at least) and no drinks had been served, offered or even any sight of the cabin crew. However the IFE is AVOD and it works – which is step up from QF on this trip…

There is an amusing moment during dinner as I realise that I have ordered the Japanese meal and the old Japanese gentleman next to me has in fact ordered the western meal :) The meal is very nice and not too exotic – I know I should be more open to experimentation but I do have to have the fall back position that I must have some food to wash down the wine ;)

I settle down to watch the Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver and the start of Ocean’s 13 (I will watch the end on another flight). I do note a complete absence of cabin crew from the point at which the meal service is over until the end of the flight.

Although the flight is ok, I think I was expecting a little more uniqueness from JL – something to really distinguish it from the other airlines. CX has a very Asian feel but JL just felt bland. Perhaps I was expecting geishas for cabin crew and a teppanyaki grill being rolled through the cabin – I guess it doesn’t matter what the “true” quality of the product is – if it doesn’t match your expectations then you are going to be disappointed.

The arrival into NRT is very smooth and due to my comparatively long legs I am through immigration before any queues have formed – and talking about forms the immigration staff actually point out a mistake I made on the form and correct it for me (slightly different to our friends in LOTFAP).

As I wait for my bus to the Hilton (only a 5 minute wait) I realise that with my JL flight I have reached something of a plateau where the flight itself is no longer a driver for the journey and that does make me a little sad :(

Hilton Narita Airport

This is very much a flying visit and thus in theory a very short element of the trip report to write (we shall see how that pans out). To say this is “at” the airport is a little misleading – it is roughly a fifteen minute bus ride – which I know is better than the train to the city but it still isn’t that close. It is pitch black as we approach the hotel but do have an overwhelming feeling of size and space as we walk in.

Check in is very, very slow and there is no obvious signs of recognition of status other than a breakfast voucher. I am given a 10th floor room but nothing much else. The room is again surprisingly large but very simple. I certainly don’t mind simple in hotels. I jump online immediately and try to call home but I think it is a little late for mrssimongr to be awake. The broadband speed in the hotel is great so I grab a couple of beers and catch up with AFF and some more laptop TV. By about 11Pm I am starting to crash so I set the alarm and hit the hay. Remembering just as I fall asleep that 4 beers and a bag of potato chips does not a dinner make.

I am awake before the alarm and open the curtains on to a truly fantastic view of Japanese forests. Quite breathtaking and I can even imagine Ninjas from Tenchu Stealth Assassins crawling through those forests…

I have a nice but slightly strange shower – sort of like a tripod alien from War of the Worlds. Knowing I will be fed at the lounge or on board or both I skip breakfast and head straight down to the bus. It is again a slow process checking out – I seem to be behind a heap of Swissair cabin/air crew. It is a reasonable ride to the airport on the bus – although there is a slightly weird passport control security checkpoint that I have not experienced before. The passport check is almost cursory so I am unsure what purpose this check point serves other than “busy work”

At the airport itself F check in is very slow but I can certainly tell that this is an AA flight with the number of people talking about “upgrades clearing”…

Journey – NRT-DFW
Flight no. – AA176
Class – First
Seat – 1J

I am quickly through immigration and this time it is straight to the F lounge. I know the AC here is great but it just isn’t an F lounge. I jump online, grab a glass of Moet and relax. Take off is 11:50 so at about 11:15 I start sauntering towards the gate knowing I have plenty of time.

As I cross the Terminal I can here my name being called “mr simongr – please make yourself known to the ground staff as you are the last person to board and we are about to leave without you – thankfully you don’t have any luggage so you are easy to leave behind”. I am in a little shock as it is only 11:20 so I still have 30 minutes???

I start to rush to the gate and am pretty much grabbed by a member of staff and thrown to the gate. It is only as I board that I recheck my boarding passes and note that my DFW-LGW flight departs at 11:50 whereas my NRT-DFW flight departs at 11:30 – oops… See what I mean about my head not being in the game…

I actually walk onboard at 11:25 and everyone is stunned that I actually made it. I sheepishly go to my suite and am pleased that not only am I on board but I am also in a Flagship Suite – my first experience of these.

The staff are fantastic – no surly or negative comments and no admonishments – just an offer of a glass of champagne – which I gladly accept ;) I do however feel like a total rookie :(

As I said this is my first experience of Flagship suite and I am very impressed. I like the little bit of movement you can – it feels a gimmick but it does give you that little bit of freedom of movement. I am slim (well not as slim as I used to be) 6’ 2” so the narrowness of the seat is not an issue for me. I would rate these seats over the current 744 QF F seats by quite a margin.

As I did board a little late I miss out on the fish option (noting again a lack of menus in F) so settle for steak which looks ok. My initial drink is a Kirin beer with my mozzarella balls canapés- I elect to skip the “fruit of the devil”*

Appetiser is a prawn salad and smoked salmon. The prawn is an incredibly dense meat which is a little surprising. Given I am having steak for main I skip the steak Caesar salad. As I have said on many occasions this is just something that I don’t understand – a salad course between courses. The steak is surprisingly nice** and is joined by more Australian Koonunga Hill Shiraz.

I am pleasantly surprised that there is AVOD on board and no DVD player. It is not clear from the AA website that there is AVOD on the suites. This is “confused” further as F class pax get a “video selection” card of available movies. But it was AVOD so I was able to watch the end of O13 and the whole of “Next” which was a great Nicholas Cage movie. I make further in-roads into Season 2 of Numb3rs which I am starting to really like as a show – brings me back to my days when I used to be a maths whiz – my how times change … I sleep for a couple of hours after lunch but not much more than that. I either needed to fall asleep for the full flight – kind of tough with a late morning flight or at least get 4 – 5 hours…

Shortly after the beer service stops :oops: , about 3 hours out from DFW breakfast is served – there is some confusion as I end up with both omelette and cereal – which to me amounts to a single breakfast rather than some form of extra breakfast…

Towards the end of the flight I utilise the “working position” of the seat which is really good – obviously not much work is done but it is nice to sit directly looking out of the window as I read a book – it helps to break the journey.

[excessively long aside]

A quick comparison of F

Ok I now have experience of three four five versions of F on a decent long haul flight – Old CX (Airbus and 747), Current QF, Old AA and new AA so it might be time for a bit of a league table based on the key components of what makes a good F class for me: seat, booze, segregation from the hoipolloi, service, food and the soft stuff :)

Seat

AA new
QF
CX 747
CX Airbus
AA old

The new AA seat is the obvious winner for me. I like the movement (if that wasn’t clear above), there seems more available space than QF and CX (unless you have the bassinet positions). The CX seat feels smaller and on the airbus I felt very close to the pax next to me – so have a window seat (I have had all window seats on QF) was a big step up for AA. The AVOD worked and the screen was a decent size.

Booze

QF
CX 747/Airbus
AA/AA

AA is the clear loser here due to starting off by serving Champagne in a plastic cup. Also the G&T is a little overly strong. QF makes a good stand with good simple wines and beer rather than stellar and risky wines (I only drink ANZ wines if I have the chance with the exception of Champagne of course. The CX G&T is the best but QF gives it a run for it’s money.

Now although there is a ranking in this section the graduations between carriers is minimal – the plastic cup is a bit downer for AA though.

Segregation from the Hoipolloi

QF
CX 747
CX Airbus
AA New
AA Old

Now this will be a slightly obvious order here as the 747 has you turning left always so you don’t ever get battered as the herd as they troop off to weigh down the back of the aircraft.

AA new almost sneaked in here as I did turn left on boarding due to using the 2L door being used.

Service

CX Airbus
CX 747
AA new
AA Old
QF

Now this might be a little controversial. CX takes this out comfortably with the Airbus edging out the 747 simply virtue of the cabin crew being able to serve quenelles of sour cream with the smoked salmon and caviar during turbulence so bad that I held onto the trolley for them to stop it taking off. Generally attentive staff with nice little touches that make a difference.

I guess the controversy will be QF. Now I have to admit that my last two QF F flights have been fantastic – perhaps even better than CX. The problem is that I have had one flight where the service was average and one where the service was poor. Now I don’t get aggrieved at that in J but in F I want a consistent standard especially when they set the benchmarks so high. That is why AA edges out QF. On AA I know I am going to get a fairly friendly but casual service standard but on QF I either feel like a rock star or interference to their busy schedule.

Food

Now this is a tough one and one that I am overall most disappointed with. By the reports from SQ and things like “book the cook” with plates of lobster being splashed everywhere I was really expecting something special when I flew in F but in general I am not blown away.

There have been nice touches – the caviar service on CX, the steak sandwich on QF (although I think now the relish is referred to as a “spicy relish” so that is off the menu), the Thai beef rolls on QF and the hot (well not always hot) fudge sundae on AA - these were all great. But the main courses in general have been a let down – over cooked beef and lamb (QF and CX), tasteless pasta (QF), random vegetables (CX), repetition of appetisers (AA) – frankly a litany of mains that I look back without fondness. Now I know all of my F seats have been points/certificate upgrades so I can’t complain that I didn’t get what I paid for – but it has made me think that when I can pay for F (on an AONEx for our Anniversary one year) I know I wont be paying for the food – just for the seat.

The Soft Stuff

This is the things around the flight – the pyjamas (or lack thereof), amenity kits, greetings on boarding – and frankly AA is left for dead in this regard. Amazing that on my last flight they didn’t even have an amenity kit and when they do it is the same as the J kit. Overall in F on AA you are not paying for the soft stuff. CX and QF would be for me on a par – neither are a quantum leap above J (except for the PJs) but I would be interested to benchmark CX/QF against EK or SQ – mind you that would need a quantum shift in my travel patterns ;)

Conclusion



But seriously for me I am lucky in a way that there isn’t a choice in a way. Into and out of Oz I will try and fly QF on a 744 so that I can points upgrade. TATL and TransPac I will try to get on an AA flight and eVIP. At any other time if I have the opportunity I will fly F on any OW carrier that I can.

Now if only I could get that elusive Op-Up to F on BA….

[/excessively long aside]

[narrator]

If our readers will recall simongr was just regaling us with his journey from NRT to DFW on AA in a Flagship Suite. When we last left him he was sat looking out the window using the “working” position of the flagship suite – obviously not working but we have made our judgements regarding his work ethic. As we rejoin him I sense that we may be about to land

[/narrator]

We begin our descent into DFW and I slide my suite into the landing mode and keep reading as we have a slowish descent. I only have an hour and a half or so of layover here so it will be a dash to the AC and then boarding almost. As we are in F I employ the usual NM style of airport travel and am quiet surprised that I am not outpacing everyone else – I guess I was really on a road warriors’ flight. Thankfully they are mostly Americans so they don’t beat me to the immigration queue. I am the very first non-US national from our flight to get to the immigration queue and the ponderous understaffed US immigration process strikes again. I am in the queue for over thirty minutes – behind the previous flight. The staff are incredibly slow to get set up when they start to open more booths and for the love of god people – can you please organise your visas BEFORE you arrive. The number of people who seem to have to be taken off for further processing is staggering and it means that we are frequently down to 1- 2 immigration staff :(

Finally I am through immigration into customs where I am selected for random screening :( Perhaps because I was honest and said I was on my way to Cyprus after the US? The customs staffer who rifles through my bags is actually pretty good and friendly. He takes great interest in my travel notebook and comments on my opinions of the last F flight :oops: After 10 minutes of this (heaven help anyone who was travelling with anything but hand luggage only) I am finally on my way to the AC.

Obviously nothing is that simple as I have to negotiate a painfully slow (even with the express lane) security process to get into the Terminal. I then take the long way round on the skytrain the correct terminal (might have been quicker to walk almost…)

At the AC I am given a drinks voucher – I assume due to the international itinerary – and then book the shower. I just have time to grab a cold beer and check AFF before I am called for the most pathetic shower of the journey :( But I am refreshed as I check my BP about 10 times to ensure I have the correct boarding time ;)…

*also known as olives

** Remember guys we are discussing food on an American carrier – the benchmark is set pretty low

Ah good some more updates. Next chance I get to print this out I will for reading matter on yet another longhaul flight.

how can QF be better thant CX in these 2 cetegories?

The seat (even the old F) is much wider and softer than QF, and have retractable arm rest.

Also QF's F Class is so tight in space no matter which seat you are in you feel cramp compare to CX. They pack 14 vs 12.

I would suggest a SIN-EWR flight - I got a little carried away ;)

It felt like the CX seat was shorter than the QF seat and when flying on CX on the airbus I had the centre seats and have always had the window seat on QF - so I have felt close to the other F pax.

In terms of the first category of being separated from the hoipolloi - that refers to the people behind the curtain rather than the people of substance up the front ;)

Not a problem. I have a lot of flights coming up.

Looking forward to your next instalments ;)

Next installments probably Monday as I will be home in the afternoon waiting for the kitchen guys to deliver stuff...

Journey – DFW-LGA
Flight no. – AA728
Class – First
Seat – 3A

I head to the gate a little early as I need to grab some cash for the taxi ride to the city when I get to NYC. This is probably the hardest part of the journey – some terminal maps indicate that the ATM is at Gate 28 and others at gate 25, the “helpful” chap at the info desk says that the ATM is at gate 30 and I finally find it at gate 26!

Boarding actually starts a little early (but I am here on time so no issues there) and as I board I realise this is an S80 and I have booked the left side of the cabin so my carry on take up a good chunk of the overhead. Thankfully my seat buddy who normally travels with hand luggage this time due to various circumstances is travelling with checked luggage.

As ever there is only water and orange juice offered as a pre-flight drink and the joys of US domestic travel come rushing back to me. Boarding early does mean however a slow and lengthy boarding process so I have plenty of time to write up some notes getting me up to date pretty much. I even stopped writing the notes on this flight as I had gotten to the point where I was writing about the notes I was writing about this flight.

For once I make a bold move after take off – I start a conversation with my seat buddy. I guess 18 hours without human interaction other than cabin crew and ground staff makes even the lone gunman twitchy. We actually had a decent chat about flying and travel – he was an extensive Hiltonian as well (ok so I am not an extensive Hiltonian – just a recently frequent Hiltonian). Thankfully and finally he asks for a beer after take off so I don’t feel too bad to be the only one drinking again… most of my seat buddies seem to have “taken the pledge” and often look at me with disdain when I sip a glass of wine :(

Lunch is served and I foolishly gamble on the Turkey sandwich and a glass of white “wine” – let us never mention the “wine” again. The service is however great – at least on a par with the international first I just left. We are asked how many beers we think we might like to have on the flight as they only have a small number of our choices up here and they will need to go and get more from down the back and put it on ice for us :) (hmm I really should carry those applause stickers with me). As usual the warm gooey cookie is a tasty messy treat – and I pass on the offer of a second.

This is on reflection a really bad seat choice – window seat bulkhead. Admittedly I have no recliner but it is really pretty uncomfortable. I do really need to review my approach to seat selection for future trips. I think I have over thought some of them and not actually worked out what is the important part of the seat selection…. You know I think it is time for a little exercise in seat selection.

[aside]

When I were a lad and we had to walk fifteen mile through fog and snow just to see a sign post to the airport you had to turn up 7 hours before the flight the day before yours just to avoid being stuck in row 632 between Martin Ruane and Shirley Crabtree and you took what you were given and were grateful for it. Now it’s all “forward aisle” this and “5E for FEBO” that. The pressure I am put under by the rest of the FF community to choose the official best seat in the house is quite daunting. It takes phone calls, logging into MMB on the BA website, FEBO and even then it’s a gamble. Have you checked the type of aircraft, who was it leased from, is it mid, lo [sic] or high J, are you sleeping or peeing, is it a domestic flight on an international flight number? So many potential pitfalls – and then some of the guidance can’t even agree. Seat Guru lists some seats as “this is a great seat but also a bad seat” – I mean c’mon guys throw me a bone here!

And then you have my non-OCD friends who I say “Have you requested a seat yet?” to respond with “No, but my booking says 3C – seems ok”.

Q. Am I overthinking this?
A. Yes – probably

Q. Does it matter?
A. Based on this trip – very much so. I made some horrendous mistakes – mostly around being in the front row.

Anyway – here is the logic I sort of applied to this trip:

- No matter how bad the food is it is always important to have a choice
- If food is not a question then forward is better – I don’t want to be responsible for death or injury of pax that might get trampled as I sprint for the immigration queue
- For a night flight where I want to sleep window is good
- Anywhere I really want to see the view coming into the city the window is good
- Day flights where views are not important it has to be the aisle

Now these sound like great concepts but the outcomes were horrid – too many bulkheads, window seats when I was awake, the left side of the S80 with the only saving grace being 64K on a NNCW which was great apart from the non-functioning AVOD at my seat :(

So what is the outcome – will I be less picky? I think not, looking at my upcoming trips the seat selection will be key (unless the F upgrade comes through ;)) I just need to work smarter, not harder

[/aside]

My seat buddy offers to share a cab and ordinarily I would say no but this time I am more relaxed about it. However as he has checked bags and I am free and easy the cab share doesn’t happen.

After the meal service the flights drags a little but eventually we are landing at LGA with my specially selected window seat. This is my first day time landing into New York and I am really excited about looking at …. clouds over New Jersey…

It is however a beautiful day in Manhattan – it is warm and sunny without being humid like China. I am off the aircraft like a Whippet chasing a piece of fur on a mechanical track in the misbegotten belief that there is a rabbit there, poor poor whippet how badly we mistreat you…

The queue for the cab resembles the Friday night melee in Sydney but without the neat lines of cabs – on the upside though unlike the Sydney melee this cab queue flows like mischief of rats sliding through the greased pipes of the local [name of fast food outlet redacted to avoid potential litigation].

In the can the meter goes on which always unnerves me in foreign cities. I was sure that there was a fixed fee from LGA to the city but I am proved wrong. It is a pretty speedy cab ride to the city but we hit gridlock as we hit Manhattan. Unsurprising given that it is 5 pm on a Friday night. Eventually I get out about 100 metres from the Doubletree Suites – another advantage of hand luggage only and I walk to the hotel….

The Doubletree Suites Times Square

I am not sure what I was expecting from the DTS TS. I had of course been to the DT on Lexington so the benchmark should have been set pretty low. Check in is painfully slow and I am not given many Diamond benefits other than complimentary breakfast – no exec lounge or evening cocktails…

[aside]

Just a quick one here – I am sure I have read about how the Diamond benefits are not recognised outside of the US and this is not matching my limited experience – the Conrad and Hilton Shanghai had great Diamond benefits and the DTS TS has basically nothing.

Obviously this is not an exhaustive sample but I will update as time progresses on.

[/aside]

The room itself is pretty small and drab. It does have three discrete rooms – lounge, bedroom and bathroom – but in total floor space I would estimate that it is pretty close to the DT on Lexington room that I had. My first impression is not one of awe and if I recall correctly a lot of people had rated this hotel pretty highly.

10 minutes after debagging (that means unpacking rather than the UK boarding school interpretation of the phrase :oops:) I find that there is free wi-fi in the room and I am able to check the opening times of the Apple store on 5th Avenue (24/7 365 days a year if you are interested) so it is offski to the Apple store to get my iPod Touch :)

On the relatively short walk there I stop by the Tumi store as part of my plan to get a new garment bag whilst I am here. The same chick serves me as the last time I was here enquiring about the same thing. I am informed that they will deliver the bag free of charge to my hotel if I want – very tempting.

But back to the main objective of my New York quest – the Apple store.

[aside]

Just for the record I love New York. I have always been a bit of an Americanophile. I grew up watching Dallas and Hill Street Blues (perhaps not the greatest reflection of American life) rather than Emmerdale and Z Cars (although as I grew up in Birmingham I did watch Crossroads). I lived on an American Air Force base in the UK as a teenager, visited American military recreation centres in Germany and Italy when I lived in Germany and played American Football at an English University – I think you might be seeing a theme here.

When I was looking to change jobs just before I moved to London I actually explored the possibility of moving to New York (my other grand idea was to go to work for Microsoft – kind of ironic as I am now a die hard Apple fan…) so when I took my current job with the offer of two NY trips per year I almost pulled their arm off accepting the job.

I have now been to NY five times and as soon as I get there/here I still and filled with a feeling of satisfaction and comfort. I now know my way around, know exactly how quickly I need to walk to make across streets without stopping for the lights to change and even have particular diversions that I take just so that I can my favourite store or building.

I just can’t wait to bring mrssimongr here next year!

[/aside]

Normally I love the 5th Avenue Apple (just for the record I am not on a Commission from Apple for each time I use the word Apple in this report – but just in case they are reading and are feeling generous – apple apple apple apple apple apple apple apple apple store but tonight it is a total Zoo – I guess partially because the new iPod range has just been released. Knowing that I will be paying by card and can skip some of the queues I do my usual trick of paying some random Apple staffer for the iPod and with a spring in my step it is off back to the hotel – via the Tumi store to collect the garment bag – c’mon admit you knew that I wouldn’t pass up on opportunity to get didn’t you ;) Hmm I have been in Manhattan an hour and I have already spent A$1,000 – perhaps I shouldn’t think about bringing mrssimongr here.

Now for those of you concerned that the purchase of second garment is going to derail The Great Hand Luggage Challenge – don’t be afraid, not very afraid at all. I am going to offer my existing garment bag to one of my colleagues when I meet them in NY.

I refrain from skipping back to the hotel but I certainly do have that happy shopper glow. The glow is somewhat diminished by the room service – a thick soft soggy pizza :( I thought a New York pizza was thin crust and Chicago was thick????

I catch up on a little more Numb3rs,c all mrssimongr and crash out on schedule at about 10PM. The only slight problem is the 3AM wake up – hmm that wasn’t suppose to happen. But it did so I watch more Numb3rs, call mrssimongr and prepare myself for a day in NY.

Now here is the problem I may have peaked too early in my NYC shopping. As I am travelling with just hand luggage there isn’t much I can buy. Also with mrssimongr spending like a demon in my absence in Sydney and my spending on glasses, iPod and luggage, Tiffany’s and Bloomingdales are off the menu on this trip! I do however mange to get some smarttips for my Kensignton power adapter :) and some CDs for sisterofsimongr (availability of CDs in Cyprus is poor and they are expensive).

I am intrigued that a large number of stores are closed on Saturday as it is Yom Kippur – not something that one sees in Sydney that often.

A little more relaxing and my colleague arrives a little later than planned from London so it is a late dinner but a fairly early night with not much drinking going on (given the last time we met for dinner we went to bed at about 3AM this is a very tame event).

Sunday is planned to be a very exciting day for me – my first baseball game – going to see the Yankees play the Blue Jays. After another 4AM wake up it is with some trepidation that we catch the subway up to the Bronx to watch the game. The train doesn’t seem actually to be running on our platform but eventually a train does roll up and we are on our way. It is a pretty long journey but eventually we are coming up out of the subway at Yankee Stadium!!!!!

We make our way to our seats, stopping to get mrssimongr a T-shirt and simongr a cold cold beer. Our seats have a fantastic view of the field and I am in heaven! The game is great but reaches crisis point in the fifth innings when they stop serving beer direct to your seat! Thankfully the relief team steps up to the mark and we can still buy beer at the concession stands inside the stadium. It was touch and go there for a few minutes.

I have a truly fantastic fascinating day – both watching the game and watching the fans. I get to see foul balls flying into the crowd, eat baseball hot dogs, drink beer and am amazed to see people moving seats during the game – something as an Englishman I would never contemplate. This does have its merits as a nice couple move next to us and explain some of the nuances that we might have missed and have an interesting discussion on the merits of the science behind global warming. This is a truly awesome day!

Back at the hotel we agree to meet for dinner at about 8PM and I grab a couple of hours sleep and then go to meet my colleague – only to get an email at 9:15 that he has only just woken up. Another quiet cheap night for our boss!

We have an intense and productive 3 days in the office (no bloodshed but close at one point which required me to take a walk around the block). By Wednesday morning I am feeling the effects of a cold that one of my colleagues was just shaking as he got to New York so Wednesday is not a fun day for me and I have a quite night in. Strange for me that I now no longer feel like I have to get out and see New York any more – and I know I am coming back in six months potentially and definitely in twelve months.

[aside]

Rugby in the East Village

[narrator]

For reference, these events take on the morning of 22 September, just before the lack of shopping and after the purchase of the iPod touch

[/narrator]

One of the more amusing parts of my trip was trying to find somewhere to watch the England/Samoa Rugby match. Given my travels on this trip I have not been able to see any games :(. The concierge at the hotel directs me to a bar in the East Village – somewhere I have never really explored – so I get a cab there only to find that they aren’t showing the game and I have to walk another 6 blocks to somewhere they are showing it. There is a US$20 fee just to watch the game but it is worth it.

I sit down to a couple of cold beers and decent brunch and watch a sub-par England team get through the game. Quite depressing really.

I decide then to walk from Soho to Times Square along Broadway as it is a really nice day. Sadly the weather turns as I turn onto Broadway and the heavens open – so it is a cab ride back to the DTS TS.

[/aside]

[aside]

The Un General Assembly and Visit of the Iranian President

Another interesting part of the New York visit was the impact of the UNGA and the visit of the Iranian President. Our office are on Lexington Ave, not far from the Waldorf and the security was huge! It was interesting so see the differences between APEC in Sydney and UNGA in NY. Sydney was turned into a virtual ghost town, whereas NY was exactly the same – just with road closures and a million cops and guys with ear pieces. I am stunned by the attitude of some of the Americans – they are fuming that the roads are closed and they have to route via a different block. They way they are talking you would think that they were living in a police state.

[/aside]

It is with a little sadness on the Thursday morning that I check out of the hotel – I have made the decision that for the same number of points for the trip next year I will book the Waldorf. Yes the DTS TS are in a good location for things and the room is a decent size – but I think for a special trip a little more elegance might be the go. And the Waldorf is closer to Bloomingdales and Tiffany’s ;)

I grab lunch with my Boss and Eurocolleague at Good Burger – Home of the Good Burger – a truly great lunch. The burgers are really tasty without the meal as a whole being over-filling. I grab my bags back at the office and finally commence my journey home.

A Town Car picks me up outside the office and it takes 75 minutes to get to Jfk at 3PM in the afternoon! As ever I get my wry smile as we turn onto the Van Wyck expressway when I see the towers at Flushing Meadows from the MIB movie.

In my head I am convinced that I am leaving from T9 but as we pull up at T8 I look over and see the derelict T8. I cant believe that flew form there only a couple of months ago.

You find more on the HHonors web site - Diamond benefits are listed here: Diamond VIP MembershipWhat is not clear is who choses.

The point is moot anyway as I do not believe this Hotel has an "Executive Lounge".

As far as seating goes; I pick and choose from available options depending on When, Where & What. Without going to too much detail, my decisions are made weighing a combination of aspects: I prefer bulkheads/exits (it's amazing how far back some of those AA 757 "First Class" Seats recline); window for routes/airports not flown before (or little) - otherwise aisle, West Side for morning flights - East Side for Afternoon (keeps sun out of eyes and generally better views). I tried FEBO, OK if it matches but the viewing is more of a consideration. (Of course I've had a couple of flights where the "preferences" (FEBO) rule was not followed.)

Yay he's learning! ^ :D

Journey – JFK-LHR
Flight no. – AA100
Class – First
Seat – 3J

Using on the 8 eVIPs that I claimed I would never need I am in F again on this flight. As above this is my first departure from the new T8 (in fact it isn’t as I have departed from here a couple of times – I just haven’t checked in here) and am pleasantly surprised by the F check in. It is like a bigger version of the QF F check in at SYD. It is a segregated area walled off from the other Pax. The main difference between SYD and JFK T8 is that there is no real difference between F and J pax here as opposed to the very clear distinction between F and J at SYD. I guess this reflects the nature of the two products – F is very much “upgraders choice” I believe in the US whereas for QF it is still a premier product (and getting better next year I hope).

The joy of hand luggage has me in the security queue pretty quickly but that is the start of my frustration. The premium security line is horrendously slow – so slow in fact that the main line is moving faster – a problem exacerbated as TSA staff direct non-premium pax to the WTMDs in front of the Premium pax.

Finally I am through security and I am a little disorientated. I can see sign posts to the AC but nothing to sign post the F lounge. Up and down the terminal a couple of times and I decide to head into the AC only to find that the F lounge is hidden in the AC – no signs at all. I guess the reason for my disorientation is that I thought I would be going to the AC I went to before when I did my crazy US tour on BEHEMOTH. I am quickly into the lounge and am handed a free wireless card and told that the service will be complimentary from October onwards.

After a couple of glasses of Chandon and a quick catch up with AFF and a call to mrssimongr I make my move to the gate for a very confusing boarding process. Initially we are told that the flight will be delayed (which is somewhat unnerving given I only have 2 hours transfer in LHR)

[aside]

Just picking that apart for a few minutes. It is a very sorry state of affairs that we have to think that 2 hours is not enough time to transit at an airport. Now that is for someone travelling first class inbound, no immigration delays expected, business class outbound and access to all elite speed privileges - how on earth could an economy passenger hope to get through???

[/aside]

Immediately after we are told that boarding will be delayed the doors to the Gate are opened and we are called for boarding. Confusion continues to reign supreme as I am first through the gate and on may to board about 10 metres ahead of the nearest other pax. The cabin crew are then out of the aircraft and stopping pax from boarding for some reason. So I am stood at the entrance to the aircraft by myself whilst everyone else is 10 metres back…

I am able to see as I look through the door that we do indeed have suites again and I am very pleased :) Onboard we are advised of further delays and my concerns about my connections are stating to prey on my mind. I know that there is nothing I can do about this but given the lack of connecting flights from LHR to Cyprus and the fact that my parents are meeting me at the airport which is 90 minutes drive from their house I just want everything to run smoothly.

We are advised that we will delayed for a little while I am able to catch up on some TR notes, listen to some music and finally we get menus on this flight. We however do not get an amenity kits – which to be honest given their quality compared to QF and BA in J/F is no great loss. The delay is now really starting to weigh on my mind and as the Captain tells us we are able to turn on electronic devices as we will be the ground for a further hour as the taxiway is completely full – and looking out of the window I see what he means. The Captain also turns on the IFE system! Although this is great it is not filling me with confidence…

Finally we begin take off and looking around you can see that the taxiway is almost as busy as the expressway I took to get here! In the air meal service begins pretty soon and I am served the strongest G&T in the air – and that is not necessarily a good thing ;) The meal itself is lovely – a fall apart lamb shank. However for some reason – either the bubbles or the muse – I just have to get stuck into typing up the trip report so I only pick at the meal. The service is pretty good if as ever a little casual. I ask them if I can have my sundae a little later as I am really enjoying writing up the report and don’t want to be distracted. It is a great plan until I crash out that is and then doze for the rest of the flight.

I am half asleep for the last hour of the flight so I am little rushed putting my gear away for landing. As we begin descending I note that it is 7AM and I am meant to be boarding for LCA at 08:20 and I still have two bags with no guarantee of being able to get two bags through security on a transit at LHR. We are told we have 10 minutes to landing – which I know means at least 20 mins until the gate.

Deplaing I rush to get to FCC and given the little sleep and a little alcohol I find the walk a little draining. I almost miss the bus to FCC but use the “short connection” excuse to squeeze on board.

So we finally reach the final hurdle for The Great Hand Luggage Challenge – FCC at LHR! As I round the corner to FCC I see a guy being pinged for a bag that looks smaller than my garment bag so a little nervously I keep ploughing towards the WTMD and no-one looks at me. Through pre-screening for fast track and I have no trouble. Finally the last hurdle the screening itself – again no challenge to The Challenge. Then that is it, free at last – thank the Lord I am free at last.

After the WTMD it is a little rushed as I try and get out of the way of the people behind me whose flight was boarding 10 minutes ago. All packed up I am off to see if I have time to get a bacon sandwich in the lounge as this has in fact taken less time than I had expected. There is no gate listed for my flight and as I have 15 minutes before official boarding so I head to the F lounge for my first LHR F lounge experience. I am stunned at how small the lounge actually is – but it is large enough for me to get a seat, a bacon roll and a glass of Piper! A quick call on the mobile to mrssimongr (I can be bothered to boot the laptop up and use Skype – a mistake I will expand on later). I actually think I had enough time to get a shower as our outbound flight is a little delayed as a small team of Nepalese Sherpas have to be recruited to bring the aircraft up from the south coast or it is towed to the gate – one of the two…

Sadly there is a growing list of airports where 2 hours is not enough connection time. When flying into LHR with shortish connection, I try to check status of flights out of LHR before boarding my flight to LHR. It can make a difference reducing stress if you know your onward flight has been delayed a couple of hours so it doesn't matter if your flight to LHR is a bit late.

Journey – LHR-LCA
Flight no. – BA662
Class – Club Europe
Seat – 1F 1D

I wander to the gate in advance of the call – a fear of repeating NRT is still strong with me. I am told that they are boarding small and infirm people but not J. I do note that there are a number of people who are child free and under the age of 90 who are boarding so I wander up to the gate – just slightly in advance of the call for rows 26-40. Now I am not 100% familiar with the Club Europe product but I am sure that J doesn’t start at row 26…

On board I am pointed to my seat by the cabin crew and in my daze I do not notice that I have sat in 1D rather 1F and as my seat buddy arrives I have to apologise but no seat change is requested – which is a surprise as 1D has faster access to exit than 1F. Perhaps my BA Gold seat buddy is not quite as obsessive about seating as I appear to be.

Finally we are preparing for departure and the only thing I can think is that I now only have 4 more flights until I get home!!!!!!!!! The lack of sleep kicks in and I sleep through the breakfast service – not even stirring for an initial glass of Champagne.

After they have cleared the breakfast service I decide to grab the laptop and do some more SOB writing. I have my Tumi arranged so that I don’t need to open the bag fully to get my laptop out – I can just slide my hand in through the zips. As I slide my hand in there seems to be more space in the bag than usual and I can’t feel the hard shell of the laptop!! I quickly pull down the Tumi and no matter how many times I move things around there is a horrible lack of laptop

In classic movie style a la Next I rewind my journey back in high speed trying to work out what had happened. I get back to FCC and my hurry to help the guys behind me who were rushing for their aircraft. I see myself put my laptop into a tray and my liquids and stuff in another tray. After the X-ray the liquids tray goes on top of the laptop tray….

I guess is it true that no good deed goes unpunished. Now I am normally quite pale skinned – amusing given that I live in the land of the sun but also not so surprising given I spend my life in an office, a train or a plane – but on this occasion I believe I went so white that the other passengers thought they were being visited by the ghost of William Spooner *

A quick chat with the CSM and all is ok – they have found my laptop at security. I am asked if I want it brought to LCA so I can pick it up there. Given the risk of missing it I elect to collect it when I get back to LHR on Monday as lost property is airside so I wont even have to go out and check back in. What a relief - or at least so I thought…

As I am a little stressed I succumb to accepting a glass of Champers followed quickly by a G&T (only Gordon’s). I am surprised at how long the flight takes without any personal IFE (I wouldn’t classify a 10cm screen as IFE). So I sit back and read more of my book and try to chill. The pax across the aisle from me take more than a little pleasure giving me some stick for my laptop loss which I take in surprising good humour. A brief chat to the CSM about the flights and Cyprus and the interesting revelation that they actually like this flight as there is 24 hours between the inbound and outbound flight for the crew so they can go out and get trollied** . I am informed that the temperature is 31 degrees in Cyprus so it is a quick visit to the lavs to switch into my shorts and a fresh t-shirt so I am feeling a little fresher as I ready myself to deplane.

Finally we are landing and then as light follows day we land. It is of course a bus ride to the terminal and within 5 minutes of landing I am through immigration, customs and waiting outside for my parents to arrive!!! Aside from the minor issue of losing my laptop, the hand luggage only bizzo is working a treat.

I think though I have surprised my parents by being so quick and I am left baking in the sun for a few minutes until they eventually arrive. It is great again to see the little fella (my nephew) – he has grown up so much already in the few months since I last saw him. This is such a massive ancillary benefit of my travels – being able to see my little nephew growing up through his first couple of years – something I was convinced I wouldn’t be able to do when he was first born in Cyprus 3 months premature…

I spend a very hot few days in the mountains (ok maybe foothills) of Cyprus having relaxing dinners and sipping G&T’s with my dad looking out over the vineyards. If only mrssimongr was here this would be perfect.


* OK so that is officially my most obscure reference – sorry about that. William Spooner was for the record an albino and thus his ghost might be described as whiter than white flag that has been left out in the sun for a little too long after having been bleached white more than a few times.

** Also referred to as: Ankled (Bristol) Badgered, Banjaxed, Battered, Befuggered, Bernard Langered, Bladdered, Blasted, Blathered, Bleezin, Blitzed, Blootered, Blottoed, Bluttered, Boogaloo, Brahms & Liszt, Buckled, Burlin Cabbaged, Chevy Chased, Clobbered Decimated, Dot Cottoned, Druck-steaming, Drunk as a Lord, Drunk as a skunk Etched Fecked, Fleemered (Germany), Four to the floor Gatted, Goosed, Got my beer goggles on, Guttered (Inverness) Had a couple of shickers, Hammer-blowed, Hammered, Hanging, Having the whirlygigs, Howling Inebriated, Intoxicated Jahalered, Jaiked up (West of Scotland), Jan'd - abbrev for Jan Hammered, Jaxied, Jeremied, Jolly Kaned Lagged up, Lamped, Langered (Ireland) [also langers, langerated], Laroped, or alt. larrupt, Lashed, Leathered, Legless, Liquored up (South Carolina), Locked, Locked out of your mind (Ireland), Loo la Mad wey it, Mandoo-ed, Mangled, Manky, Mashed, Meff'd, Merl Haggard, Merry, Minced, Ming-ho, Minging, Moired, Monged, Monkey-full, Mottled, Mullered Newcastled, Nicely irrigated with horizontal lubricant Off me pickle, Off me trolley, On a campaign, Out of it, Out yer tree Paggered, Palintoshed, Paraletic, Peelywally, Peevied, Pickled, Pie-eyed, Pished, Plastered, Poleaxed, Pollatic Rat-legged (Stockport), Ratted, Ravaged, Razzled, Reek-ho, Rendered, Rosy glow, Rubbered, Ruined Saying hello to Mr Armitage, Scattered, Schindlers, Screwed, Scuttered (Dublin), Shedded [as in " My shed has collapsed taking most of the fence with it"], Slaughtered, Sloshed, Smashed, Snatered (Ireland), Snobbled (Wales), Sozzled, Spangled, Spannered, Spiffed, Spongelled, Squiffy, Steamin, Steampigged, Stocious, Stonkin Tanked, Tashered, Tipsy, Trashed, Trollied, Troubled, Trousered, Twisted Warped, Wasted, Wellied, With the fairies, Wrecked Zombied

Journey – LCA-LHR
Flight no. – BA663
Class – Club Europe
Seat – 1F (no seriously this time it is 1F)

I have a relaxing but exceptionally hot day travelling to LCA from PFO (and I actually plan for this and wear a throw away t-shirt on the journey to the airport and dump it in the lounge). My mind is not 100% in the game as a couple of last minute purchases are left in the car to be forwarded on to me. I remember the last time I transited through LCA-LHR-HKG-SYD (BA-CX-CX) I had trouble with getting boarding passes all the way through. This time I am pleasantly surprised to get BPs all the way to the SYD (although the J BP on QF HKG-SYD is hopefully going to have a fairly short lifespan ;)). I wonder afterwards is the combination of BA-BA-CX is the trigger for that.

LCA has a much improved exterior over my prior visits there but that does not extend to the check in area which is as ugly as ever. I am quickly through immigration and security – I do feel a little out of place with my focussed experienced* passage through check in compared to the lobsters in shorts and flip flops . The LCA makeover doesn’t extend to the Cyprus Airways lounge which is still a stinker. Sadly the smoking section of the lounge seems to have been expanded rather than eliminated :( I jump on line using the lounge computers (of which there are 4 or 5 which is not bad) to catch up with AFF and FT and to PM Kiwiflyer regarding my experience of LHR transfers.

Boarding is scheduled for 16:30 but “starts” at 16:10 so I make my way to the gate to join the large queue to go through the gate into the holding pen before catching the bus to the Aircraft. This time my rollaboard doesn’t fit into the overhead end on over seat 1G (it fitted end on over 1A outbound) so again I feel a little guilty about my hand luggage challenge – but again thankfully there is sufficient space in the overheads for everyone**.

Again I fell asleep on take off and missed the “hot” towels but I was at least awake for drinks :) The Pomery is actually quite nice and is served with some delightful little canapés – a vol au vent, pork on bread and some brown thing. It is as I look at the canapés that I realise I have left the gift from my mother in car – a Jamie Oliver Flavour Shaker.

They are showing OOTP on the 10cm main screen which does slightly devalue the cinematic experience. Dinner is chicken with tortellini but strangely drinks are served once all meals have been served. Which basically means that I have finished my main before a glass of wine is served???? Now it is not about getting jeremied it is just that I don’t have anything to drink with dinner at all – not even water….

I continue to watch the movie which thankfully (despite the reduced cinematic experience) is over 2 hours long. I reflect that although the screen is small I am actually more comfortable than when I watched it at the Odeon Marble Arch when it was first out at the movies. I mentally prepare myself for the transit/lost property reclaim/ F lounge and then sleep for about an hour. As with other seating choices on this journey this choice leaves a little to be desired. The bulk head is not great for my 6’ 2” frame but I will concede that I am this time not subject to recliners!

After landing I am thinking of being first off but as I reach back to grab my rollaboard someone pushes past me so my careful plan of 1F getting me out first is slightly scuppered ;) As we deplane I am sublimely confident and relaxed. I know I will have two bags through FCC and will be picking up my laptop and will be in the F lounge shortly.

I see that FCC has no queues and politely enquire about the location of lost property….



I am told that lost property is landside so I will have to immigrate, find lost property and then – horror of horrors check one of my bags through to SYD! So it is off immigration behind some very large queues and after some difficulty I find lost property – or at least what I thought was lost property…



Lost property actually turns out to be the left luggage area as lost property closes at 7PM. Did I arrange for the item to be left here – umm no. Ahh then I will have to call lost property in the morning or call back the next day to collect it – a little tough to do when I live in SYD…

So with that knowledge I troop back to check in, safe in the knowledge that I just immigrated and am about to check a bag for absolutely no reason at all :( With more than the occasional curse muttered under my breath I pass through the very nice R zone (a first for me) which I see takes you directly to the lounge – a nice touch.

In the lounge I am so depressed that I almost don’t bother with a glass of champagne – but I manage to force one down (the options of white or pink are given – and looking down, noting that I am not wearing a skirt or dress I opt for the white). I jump online and update AFF and FT with my latest baggage trauma.

I duck out of the lounge for a few minutes to grab book three of the Wheel of Time as I forecast that I will finish book 2 probably about an hour outside of HKG***. Back in the lounge I check whether my QFF points balance has reduced and sadly at the moment it is still on 75K which means no sign of an upgrade yet…

There is just time to force down some shiraz before heading to the gate



* Ok based on current performance I will accept some element of debate on my interpretation of “experienced…

** That is not to say that everyone was actually in the overheads just a small Albanian family that seemed to be smuggling their uncle into the UK. I wasn’t sure it was politically correct to advise the Cabin Crew of this so in typically English style I just pretended that nothing unusual was occurring.

*** Yes I lead an incredibly sad existence that I plan my life like that but that is who I am and the forecast is unsurprisingly accurate…

Journey – LHR-HKG
Flight no. – BA27
Class – Club World
Seat – 62A

The walk through LHR T1 reminds what a toilet LHR is and what an embarrassment it is for the British people that visitors to Britain are welcomed here and this will be their last memory of the country. At least this problem might be solved by T5 – even if everything else isn’t.

Thankfully boarding is a smooth process although sadly my BP is not rejected at the gate. I am very pleased to see that we have NNCW and it nice to see a more modern interior on an aircraft after a couple of weeks of older tireder planes. It is certainly a dramatic improvement over NCW.

As I take my pre-selected exit row seats, my seat buddy vanishes which I think is either that his wife has been given an op-up from WT+ or he has taken a voluntary downgrade to be with her. Either way it is another flight with no seat buddy. This is my third in a row (if you count the flagship suites on AA).

The cabin crew serve me a nice glass of bubbles but he has the strangest accent I have ever heard – kind of Porto meets Cardiff. It is all I can do to stop myself from chortling. We take off on time and I decide to give the IFE a go – slightly nervous that it is supplied by Rockwell Collins. Three reboots later and it is another less than stellar performance by RC. I have not AVOD only AV. At least I have movies on a cycle which is better than nothing.

The food is ok but not memorable and in an effort to make myself stay awake I ask if I can defer my dessert until later. This however works against me as I crash out shortly after the main course and do not have the joy of sampling the cheese selection. I actually think I slept as much as six to eight hours which although restful for me – does not bode well for my HKG-SYD flight and the potential for sleep there which is my target to assist with resetting my body clock.

About 2 hours out of HKG a third baggage trauma hits as I realise I have four(ish) hours at HKG and could have collected my luggage and gone through security with two bags – thus avoiding delays at SYD. Really simongr you need to make a better effort at being in control of your flying destiny!

I decide to skip breakfast as I know I can eat in the lounge or on board my next flight. Finally we are landing into HKG and the flight has been surprisingly smooth (except for the IFE of course). As we begin the process to deplane my mind is pretty focussed on getting in contact with the UK to get my laptop shipped to Oz. IU am very quickly through security and find myself at about gate 30. It is at that point that I realise I have left Book 3 on the aircraft – my mind really is not in the game today :(

I head to the BA/QF lounge to see if they can contact the aircraft to see if my book has been found. I then head over to the Wing managing to stop for a little shopping on the way but I am not in the mood for full enjoyment of the Wing today after the calamities that have befallen me.

I manage to get through to Lost Property at LHR and co-ordinate the couriering of my laptop so that is one less worry for me (although there is no indication of price during my discussions with the courier company and as I don’t have many options I will have to wait and see what happens). I clear a few emails via Webmail and check on AFF using the iPod Touch :). I then grab a shower and decide to skip food as I am pleased to find that my F upgrade has come through – finally some good news on this trip. Also checking my emails I have come up with a solution for an issue at work which alleviate some of the trauma of not having had the laptop for a few days and checking Facebook I find that one of my friends is now engaged!

I leave the Wing and wander through the shopping plaza, picking up a replacement for the Cross pencil that was misplaced JFK-LHR and head to the QF lounge as that is closer to the gate and I would like to see if I can get my new BP…

Journey – HKG-SYD
Flight no. – Qf128
Class – First
Seat – 3A

It’s the final countdown!!! Well at least I am officially on the way home. I ask at the lounge if I can get my new BP but am informed that can only be done at the gate so I grab a glass of Piper and catch up on more AFF on the computers in the F section of the lounge. It is amazes me how much of a broadband addict I have become. I was lost in Cyprus without broadband and now without my little lappie! I really need to wean myself off this techno dependency.

Talking of which I was quite surprised/annoyed that the iPOd Touch could happily connect to PCCW (free wifi at HKG Airport) in the CX lounge but I am semi-forced to try and used BTOpenzone in the QF/BA lounge…

A minute before the flight is called I start to wander to the gate knowing that I need to sort out BPs etc. The whY queue is horrendous – I am so glad that I choose to travel in J or choose not to travel at all. Getting my new BP does not seem to be the simple process that I was expecting and I become a little nervous as multiple calls are made to sort it out.

Finally my F BP is handed over and I wander to the gate itself. I see a heap of BPs on the gate so I assume (rightly or wrongly) that there are a heap of Op-Ups or points upgrades coming through. My 3A seat is finally a great seat I think. Sure not as much space as 4A but still a decent window seat and not too close to 3E.

On board I am greeted with a glass of Charles Heidseck 1996 which is very nice and some dip that could be tuna or hommous or eggplant – but no almonds it seems. I get half a feeling that the Cabin Crew are not that interested in me as after asking what size PJs I want they then forget to get them. The couple in front of me seem to be taking up quite a lot of the crew’s time. After a second request for PJs (with no apology for missing me) I am the second person to get changed and in fact for once I note that pretty much the whole full cabin gets changed before take off.

We are soon airborne and shortly after take off they come round to take the meal orders. I am asked what wine I would like with my meal but put in a G&T request for before dinner first. I note that I am the only person to receive a pre-dinner drink! This is what I mean about the variable service in F on QF.

I decide to take a punt on the IFE which to my surprise seems to work acceptably after a little prodding. Dinner is very nice – possibly one of my best choices on this trip. The soup is very nice pumpkin and coconut with a sprinkle of fried shallots – 100% yum! I forget what the main course was (and given the state of my house at the moment the likelihood of finding the purloined menu is slim) but do recall being adequately satisfied. I watch a couple of movies and finally manage to grab about 3 hours of sleep waking just in time for breakfast.

Breakfast is a little disappointing – just a continental option :( There is quite a queue for the change out of PJs but I manage to relax for the last 20 minutes of the flight. I have some great views of Manly as we land and note that the city side views are for the K pax.

We land and finally I am nearing home. I do my usual shimmy through duty free to pick up the Bombay Sapphire and Champers but am relatively slow going through immigration as although the queue is only 2 people they seem to be the slowest two people on earth. The bag wait is frustrating after such speed through arrivals on my other flights but in retrospect it isn’t as long as it seemed.

Quarantine though is the usual schmozzle and it takes at least 25 minutes to get through but eventually I am through and meeting my driver and then the car ride home.

This is only a brief visit home as we are off to Darwin this weekend…

Journey – SYD-BNE
Flight no. – QF500
Class – Business
Seat – 2A

After a crazy couple of days in the office without a laptop, it arrives at about 2PM on the Friday just before I am heading home after a lunch with my colleague who is returning to the US – a very frustrating turn of events him being in Oz when I was overseas :(

The evening before the flight is again hectic as we prepare our house to be taken over by my in-laws as they look after the dogs whilst we are away. We can’t leave much until the morning as the car is arriving at god awful o’clock. At about 10:30PM a very tired simongr heads to bed only to wake at 1AM and 2AM in advance of the 3AM alarm given our 4:15AM departure for the airport. It is all systems go and our little hand luggage only trip to DRW begins.

If you hadn’t realised I am not using the royal “we” on this trip as mrssimongr is the driving force behind the trip to DRW as one of her friends has moved there recently and also just had a little baby. I booked her an AAward flight and added my flights to my DONE4. The problem was that I booked her a straight SYD-DRW-SYD return and I was on SYD-BNE-DRW-SYD. We were on the same flights DRW-SYD (with a quick stop in ADL) but my flight was about 4 hours earlier to BNE and I arrived in DRW about 90 mins before her. She decided she wanted to come with me to the airport so she wouldn’t have to deal with that alone. I realised on the way to the airport that I probably could have arranged for her to be on the flight with me as the points on AA would have been the same as there is no stopover. This is where my inexperience with being a FFer really shows. I had done OLCI so we walked straight through security and up into the lounge.

Mrssimongr snacked on some toast and muesli whilst I sorted out the iPod touch and checked the overnight rugby results. Just before boarding I saw some good friends of mine who were also flying up to BNE that day – I was about to offer to use points to upgrade them but they were already in J :) I make my friend quite jealous with a flourish of the iPod (he is another Mac aficionado) but I made a little nervous when his wife borrows it and it looks like I might not get it back! This is a good distraction for mrssimongr so that she doesn’t have to think about me boarding without her and she is not as upset when I walk off to board (she is nervous flyer who gets terrible ear pain whilst flying so doesn’t really enjoy it).

On boarding I think I might have a free seat next to me as it empty up until the last minute when a family of five arrive and take every last seat in J. What a performance though getting them boarded – debating which seats and where hand luggage goes – it takes them about 10 minutes to get seated!

We push back on schedule and we are quickly in the air with the seat belt sign off so I boot up the laptop and get on with some work. I decide to skip breakfast knowing I have another breakfast flight coming up later. I am quite surprised when the Captain turns on the seat belt sign – where on earth did that flight go? I am just not used to these short flights now!

We seem to have a very slow landing followed by a hand brake turn into the gate. Thankfully there is no security screening so I am in the QP within 2 mins of landing :) It is a sad thing to be in a QP when there is no booze being served – I am again just too used to travelling internationally now.

There is a last minute chance of meeting an AFFer at the QP but that is scuppered so I get on with a bit more work and wait for boarding which happens relatively soon and thankfully the gate is pretty close to the QP :)

Journey – BNE-DRW
Flight no. – QF824
Class – Business
Seat – 1A

As I board I am thankful that there are Dreamtime seats so it will be a quite comfortable flight to DRW. In my mind I compare the Club Europe product on a much longer flight to this product and QF win hands down!

I am amused that even though it is a different aircraft I have the same crew to DRW that I had to BNE! The flight is uneventful so I do a little work and watch a little laptop TV and do indulge in just a little glass of bubbles (after the second request for a top up they leave the mini-bottle behind).

The remainder of the flight is uneventful but I know that I have a fairly unpleasant 90 minutes ahead of me in the airport without lounge access. As I deplane I am quick not to go out into arrivals and actually turn back into the departure area and wonder if it is worth trying my luck with the lounge. I walk in and with my most deferential voice admit I know that I am not allowed in but ask if it is possible to chill here as I am waiting for my wife – and I am allowed in :)

I set myself up at one of the laptop stations and continue watching some laptop TV. I wonder why there is a throng of people around the bar area and realise that it is 2 minutes to 1PM and the booze bus will be leaving soon. After about 10 mins I decide to grab a cold Crown and am quite comfortable waiting for mrssimongr. I keep checking the arrivals board and mrssimongr finally lands.

I meet her in the departure area and she had a great flight – no ear pain at all thanks to the “earplanes”. We have a great few days in DRW and she is very keen to come back again next year!

We stay with her friend for a couple of days and in the Holiday Inn Esplanade for a couple of days – a very relaxing time is had by all – although the 3AM wake up for our 3:45 cab is less than welcome.

Journey – DRW-ADL-SYD
Flight no. – QF82
Class – Business
Seat – 4DF

It is hot and humid even at 4AM in DRW and finally we get to check in. As this is an internationally numbered flight we weren’t able to do OLCI. There is thankfully no queue for check in and we begin the process. I had pre-selected 3AB knowing that there were three seats in the middle section and mrssimongr wouldn’t want to sit next to a stranger and I wouldn’t want to be in the middle. This was done on two PNRs though as mine was my DONE4 and hers was the AAward. I was a little perturbed then when I was asked if they wanted to move us so that we could sit together???? For some reason I was still in 3B and mrssimongr was in 4F… We were offered 4DF which I wasn’t happy about as I did want to avoid the middle section.

Through security and for some reason my standard flight outfit sets off the WTMD and it is quite a palaver getting all my stuff back together – I wasn’t as prepared as normal.

Up to the departure lounge and the QP is not yet open. It finally opens but we have very little time there as we have to go through secondary screening for the international flight which itself is a nightmare. In the lounge I see if I can get moved up a couple of rows and get a window – at least from ADL to SYD but there is no help forthcoming as the flight is “full”

Two guys had examine every pax’s hand luggage – it is a painfully slow process only to be followed by the second transit lounge which is packed with transit pax and JQ pax – and then the flight is delayed by about 15 mins. Mrssimongr is actually feeling a little faint by the time that we finally we board and I see that the centre section of the airbus is in fact only two seats so one small crisis averted. Mrssimongr is blown away by the Skybed as she has never flown one before and now refuses to fly in any other seat again…

I skip breakfast knowing that I will be eating ADL-SYD and potentially in the ADL QP. It is a fairly short hop to ADL and we are soon on the ground and through security looking for the QP. It is a fruitless search as there is no lounge on the international side of the terminal at ADL :confused:

Thankfully boarding starts almost on time and we are back on board. I am little surprised that the “full” flight is only about 1/3 full in J so we could have moved and in fact one pax has moved up to row 1 from row 3. Breakfast is served and by the time they get to us they have run out of the hot breakfast – something I would have avoided if we had been in the seats I had requested. I was further perturbed as in row 2 there were Qantas staff family flying – so a paying pax missed out on a further forward seat and breakfast in favour of staff…

The remainder of the flight is fairly uneventful and finally we landing into SYD. Mrsismongr avoids the pain on descent again through the use of the “earplanes” and we are quickly through immigration with our D stickers, quickly through quarantine’ collected by my driver and for the final time I am on my way home properly!!

Epilogue

Wow – that was some trip. The report alone runs to 42 pages of A4 text in size 12 font. I don’t think I have written that much since University! This journey started with a lot of reflection on what it meant to travel and I guess now that the travel has been completed – does this mean that the journey is complete?

This has probably been one of the hardest trips I have made. Admittedly the 5 weeks away last July was a long time but it was just in two places and the work was so hard that I didn’t do much else. This trip was complicated, unstable and a little lonely as I did the whole trip by myself. It is not one that I would like to repeat really – I think I might have more flying on my next DONE4 as I might endeavour to really max out those miles and see if I can almost qualify for EXP on one trip ;) But I will try and do that in about 16 days rather than 25.

So what lessons have I learned on this journey. The obvious one is that hand luggage only is not a method of travel it is more than even a lifestyle – it is a religion and I will praying in that Church as much as I possibly can. It gave me so much more freedom but at the same did make for some recurrent wardrobe choices :)

So what was it like to travel as an experienced traveller? Well to be honest based on the rookie mistakes that I made, the items I lost and found, the poor seat choices and a general lack of focus – what this trip has shown me is that my journeys in reality have only just begun. I may know the best F lounge in HKG airport but I doubt that Kiwiflyer, NM, serfty or Dave Noble are the last person called to the flight because they are sipping beer in the lounge…

Although this trip was hard and too long what it has done is give me a chance to make more of the journeys I will be taking. It gave me a kick up the backside to shake my arrogance and complacency. I did more for myself and more outside of my office and room service than I have done before – forced I guess because I was travelling by myself. More importantly it gave me the chance to travel with mrssimongr and not just to BNE again – but somewhere different where she was in a top of the range J seat.

Where to now then? Well next is a couple of simple CircleAsias in November and February and then potentially we may be seeing The Grand BEHEMOTH in March but between now and then I have to wait for my kitchen to be installed, have my first Christmas with my newish Australian Nephew, buy a car and grind mrssimongr down into accepting that we need a new TV ;)

So for a short while, this Chocka Bloke Checking out :)

simongr

You are an incredibly gifted and talented writer. I enjoy your posts and reading them instills in me a desire to get out there and take a "behemoth" of my own.

Enjoy your time back home and good luck with the kitchen

(CC FT/AFF)

Simon, B & SOB have been both fascinating and illuminating, reflecting situations and circumstances that I have come across over the years.

It's been great to grasp the sense through your writings of your experience and knowledge broadening. This comes not only through your questions and information/advice thus gained via FT/AFF, but as your exposure to situations accumulated, your analysis of them and publication herein of these indicate as such.

I'm sure your TR's here should a great source of information for travellers for years to come.

:o Not always, I have been guilty of that in years gone by. I do try to minimize my gate time, but also to be present when boarding commences. So it's a sort of balance between knowing when your inbound has arrived, how long does experience suggest before boarding commences and one's contemporary needs.

"Hand luggage only" is good if possible, it's not always, esp. on return from long trips. Nothing to pray for but good if you can do. As for "recurrent wardrobe choices", most business associates wouldn't raise an eyebrow knowing one is travelling (just avoid those Laksas and saucy Pasta dishes :p).

As for trip reports, I have dabbled in them; I try to keep to standard, but I still have not got back from Dubai yet. :( One day I will! :rolleyes: