Stupid questions you've heard from rookie flyers
 

The best I ever heard was on a SouthWest flight when the person on the windo in the row behind me asked the flight attendant how to roll the window down.

Granted, we were still at the gate and the plane was a bit warm, but puh-lease! :rolleyes:

I don't think this is an entirely fair question - not all americans have the means or the desire to fly and travel like we do.

up until a few years ago, it's been said that there's always a rookie on a flight. With the uptick in travel, I don't think that's always the case but nonetheless, not everyone knows what to do with oxygen masks, where to find emergency info etc.

Because we're frequent flyers questions that may seem dumb to us are serious to the person asking as they're inexperienced.

But it's still fun...most of us aren't being mean , but in all fields (including non-aviation) rookies get made fun of behind their backs a lot of times :)
My favorite is when people get American, America West, ATA, and AirTran Airways confused with each other (in some combination, most common ATA/Airtran and American/America West).

Heard at LHR about to board a Virgin flight to the US...

"how do they get two aircraft on the same stand"?...

This was in reference to the two flight numbers the aircraft had, VS and CO numbers :D

Not stupid, just cute, and actually quite refreshing at times. Oh to be so green again! My favorite (of which there are many) , is the sweet old couple in the DTW airport (where the whole facility is nothing but NWA) that grabbed my jacket, squinted at me and said "Missy, where is Northwestern Oriental?" I still laugh out loud at that one!

In the 70's, they were called Northwest Orient Airlines.

ummm.. thanks, that's why it's funny!

There is no stupid question, just stupid people who do not ask questions ;)

I heard once a funny story, but never found out if it was true... anybody knows?

A first flyer, leaving from some Midwestern airport alledgedly opened or tried to open the emergency door in order to wave at family seeing him off just before take off. Is it a true story or just a legend?

that's funny... like askin where the PanAm desk is.

We were all rookie flyers once, so I give newbies the benefit of the doubt.

About 3 hours into a transatlantic flight, my four year old started asking repeatedly, "Why can't I go outside and play??!! Why??!!"

NOT SO Funny!
 

Suggest that civicmon look at Pan Am Clipper Connection web site for the cities that will have a Pan Am desk.

They include:

Bedford, MA
Boston/Portsmouth (PSM), NH
Columbus, OH
Fort Lauderdale, FL
Newburgh/Poughkeepsie, NY
Orlando/Sanford (SFB), FL
Punta Cana, Dominican Republic
San Juan (SJU), Puerto Rico
Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic
St. Kitts, St. Kitts/Nevis
St.Petersburg/Tampa Bay, FL
Trenton, NJ

While I will be the first to agree that it would be funny to ask about PanAm in LAX, for example, someone in FLL looking for PanAm has no right to be laughed at.

This airline exists and is called Pan Am Clipper Connection.

Now as I recall the NWA radio commercials with (cannot think of the famous Minneapolis WCCO radio comentators name) it was called NORTHWEST Orient (gong/BONG sound) AIR.....Lines. Can remember riding in my Dad's 53 DeSoto (in the mid-60's) at 6am when he went to work listening to the commerical and thinking how wonder flying to the (gong) Orient sounded!

yes, I heard of it :rolleyes: but lets be realistic here, it would be funny if someone showed up at JFK or something looking for PanAm.

That's not the real PanAm... just another asset sold off in bankruptcy court.

Had you chosen Eastern, National, NorthCentral, Piedmont, Braniff, ValueJet, Ozark (was going to say Frontier but they have come back too!) or even T'Dub... I could not have caught ya!

Wonder if someone will buy the bankrupt name of US Airways??

I do agree .. people say stupid things!

Sometimes the stupid question isn't stupid at all-- we've just conditioned ourselves to the stupidity. There's a story, which may be apocryphal, that Steve Ballmer used his mother to demo a new version of Windows. She figured out how to do everything except shut down-- "You go to the start button to stop?"

So in that light, "'tampering with, disabling, or destroying a smoke detector'-- aren't disabling and destroying just different kinds of tampering?"

<sigh> if only there was a Pan Am desk.

At SFO, I once overheard a couple ask how to get to OAK as fast as possible, as they hadn't bothered to check which airport was listed on their ticket. I thought this was riotously funny. My partner, who has less travel experience, was more sympathetic.

Paul Marcelin-Sampson
Santa Cruz, California, USA

I don't think that's a rookie flyer mistake.. i think that's a stupid one period.

A young woman that worked for me had two humorous events happen to her while she was flying.

The first occurred when she was in line to check in at the gate. An elderly woman in front of her was asked if she wanted an aisle or window seat. After a few seconds of reflection, she answered. "I'll have an aisle seat, please. I don't want my hair to get messed up."

The second occurred in the early 90's when the airlines were having wars to get people on the planes. The prices were so low that there were many first time flyers. A gentleman in front of her was pushing a "call flight attendant" button over his head and saying in a loud voice "I'll have a Coca Cola, please." The flight attendant came running down to help him and explained that he did not have to scream at the button, etc. She decided to get him the Coke, even though it was not at the scheduled time to do so. It seemed like it would be a lot easier. When she returned with the Coke, he asked, "how much is that?" She said it was complimentary. He answered, "can I have a six-pack, then?"

My brother is not a rookie flyer, but he did make a funny comment that I think you'll enjoy.

I took him on a trip to San Francisco once and we had a layover in Atlanta. While there, we visited the Crown Room which he had no idea existed. He ordered a couple of beers and asked how much it costs. The reply of course, was that they were complimentary.

Upon arrival to San Fran, he said let's stop in the Crown Room before we get our bags, and once again he ordered a couple of beers.

When we were getting our luggage, he said, "I think we need to spend some serious time in that Crown Room every night. My god, what a great deal." Here he was in San Francisco, and his idea of fun was to spend each night at the Crown Room.

Ah, free beer. Does it really get any better than that? OT, but reminds me of my first tour of the Coors facility in Golden, CO in 1976. As we were led to the tasting room at the conclusion of the brief tour, the hostess invited us to return for a couple free cold ones anytime. She refered to the hospitality room as the Colorado School of Mines campus lounge. :D

My first time in first class was in 1971, shortly after graduating college with no assets and $6,000 in student loans. After landing the two others traveling with me, who were more experienced and knew I was a drinker, asked me why I didn't order a drink. I answered, because there is no way I was going to pay those prices.

stupid question
 

I didnt over hear this, i said this. it was a couple years ago and my first international flight. i was bumped and was told i was going to fly out msp-lgw on nwa in world business class. now i know there is a first class, but didnt know there was a different name when flying international. i asked the ga, what is WBC, he replied first. oh, i felt about two feet tall. but it all turned out good, i got 700.00 in ticket vouchers and a ug to wbc. it is the ONLY way to fly.

I did this once in New York (and gotta feel like I'm not the only FTer who has). I had flown into JFK and never looked at my ticket when departing and just had the cab take me back to JFK. When I got to the ticket counter, the agent was like "ummmmm... you're not leaving from this airport, you've gotta go to LaGuardia".

But... I've always shown up on the right day for my flights! :D

A flight attendant once told me that she was asking people if they were comfortable sitting in the exit row in case of an emergency and if they could assist if needed. She asked the passangers to read the safety card and then one of the guys sitting in the exit row actually tried to open the emergency door to see if it would actually open.

Was on a shuttle bus on Sun. going to the Joint Service Open House air show at Andrews AFB, and the women behind me were talking about the big merger between "United Airways" and "American Western" for a couple minutes.

Not long ago, was traveling for work with a colleague who was describing flying out of National out of terminal A, and how it was on someone like jetBlue. If only jetBlue flew from DCA...

Goes to show that most people have no clue what airline or type of plane they are on...

Did it once with LGA and EWR. The gate agent told me I was the 3rd person that day she'd dealt with who showed up at the wrong airport. Happens all the time I'm sure in So. Cal, NYC, SF Bay, Miami and anywhere else where there is more than 1 major airport within a metro area.

My frequent travel partner never has any idea what type of plane he's on. Once I tried at least to get him to see the difference between a 747 and other planes by pointing out the hump in the fuselage. He said, "I never noticed that before. They have an upstairs???" He then said something like, "I thought there were only two types of planes--some with one aisle and others with two aisles." And he flies all the time!

:rolleyes:

Not a stupid question, but the ultimate wrong airport mistake.

http://www.bdb.co.za/shackle/articles/wrong_sydney.htm

'What does an e-ticket look like?'

Before we were married, my wife lived in DC. The first time she was flying home, she told me that she was going to drop off her car at the airport and I needed to pick her up at LAX.

Me: What airport are you flying out of?
Her: Duels.
Me: Where's that?
Her: Here in DC.
Me: That's not in DC. Are you driving to some small airport in the area?!?
Her: No. I flew out there last time. Duels
Me: What's the airport code?
Her. IAD
Me: Oh... Dulles (pronounced correctly)

I still chuckle when we fly back. And I make sure that we fly into "Duels."

deleted...sorry

Don't see anything to be embarrassed about or "two feet tall" about for a question like this. It seems like a perfectly legitimate question for even a seasoned flyer to ask what WBC is -- after all, most flyers have never been on a plane with WBC, and even fewer have sat there.

So stand tall.

I was on a Southwest flight recently when a passenger came upon seat 24C and announced to the gentleman already seated there that 24C was his assigned seat. As it turns out, the agent who checked him in wrote down the gate (C 24) on the BP and the passenger assumed that was the seat he had been assigned.

They said they were enjoying looking at the pick-up trucks, and eating the local lobster.

Love it.

I was on the rental car bus, going back to LAX. The driver asked a guy which airline. His answer? Jet Blue. :eek: Doh!!

I don't think there are a lot of truely stupid questions (Although I might count on a early morning 45 minute flight seriously asking what's for breakfast.) But some people can be very stuborn about what they think is right. For example:

Woman: "Excuse me, could you dirct me to ATA's gate?"
Me: "Sorry ma'am, this isn't my usual airport, I don't know where ATA is, perhaps you could ask a gate agent."
Woman: "Don't you work here?!"
Me: "I'm a flight attendent for AirTran, I don't know the other parts of this airport."
Woman: ::showing me her ticket:: "I'm flying AirTran to (I forget where)."
Me: "I'm sorry ma'am, we don't fly there, you are flying ATA."
Woman: ::upset:: "Yes you do! It says so on my ticket!"
Me: "But you are flying ATA, not AirTran."
Woman: ::exasperated:: "They are the same thing!!!!"

We had a new consultant start a few years ago who lives in Portland Maine. She booked her very first trip with the company TA and when she got to the airport she found out that she was booked from Portland Oregon instead of Portland Maine. :D

Another one my TA told me.... she had a customer call up to make reservations to fly PHL-BOS. The TA said he had to go thru Dallas. He said "I have to fly thru Dallas to get to Boston?" She said "Oh, I thought you said "Austin". :o

Along similar lines: My uncle and a number of colleagues were waiting for a shuttle bus at a conference hotel to go to the airport to fly back to Austin, TX. The shuttle bus arrived, and the driver asked, "So where are you all going today?" My uncle dutifully replied "Austin." Yet, they ended up at the Westin Hotel! They did make their flight though, despite the hotel run-around...