The logistics of doing this "(quietly, calmly, and out of earshot of the customer of size)" after the passenger of size has been seated is a little baffling.


I disagree.

"Excuse me sir/Madame, I need to use the washroom. Thank you."

Walk over to FA, discuss. Seems pretty straightforward.

Haha, people use the seat back for leverage all the time and it's probably my biggest onboard pet peeve. I sometimes wish they were like the walls surrounding people's houses in Mexico....embedded with broken beer bottles. Why people can't use the base of their arm rests to get up I'll never understand.

Seriously though, I would try the "hey man, you're a big guy, let's ask the FA if there's an empty middle seat somewhere." I can assure you that he's aware of the discomfort he's causing and I find that polite honesty is the best way to go with a stranger. Airports in general need more of it.

Oh my god.. I'm dying Tom.

For some reason, I always feel like the person next to me is entering my space in Economy. Call me a snob. I'm 6' 6" and I'm pretty slim, but always sit next to someone that gets all up in my grill.

Tom, you have shown me the way. I will use this strategy from now on.

1. Yes, this is actually a Contract of Carriage issue so it's relatively easy to get compliance if there's a dispute:

RULE 21 REFUSAL TO TRANSPORT
UA shall have the right to refuse to transport or shall have the right to remove from the aircraft at any point, any Passenger for the following reasons:
H) Safety – Whenever refusal or removal of a Passenger may be necessary for the safety of such Passenger or other Passengers or members of the crew including, but not limited to:
9) Passengers who are unable to sit in a single seat with the seat belt properly secured, or are unable to put the seat’s armrests down when seated, unless they comply with Rule 6 I);

Rule 6 I) is passengers who buy tickets for two seats:

RULE 6 TICKETS
I) Passengers Occupying Two Seats – Upon request, or if determined necessary by UA, and given availability, a Passenger will be permitted to the exclusive use of two seats subject to the payment of two applicable fares for the points between which the two seats will be used. A Ticket will be issued for each seat and the normal Checked Baggage Allowances will apply in connection with each such Ticket presented to UA. The carry-on allowance islimited to the allowance for one individual.

2. They'd more likely reseat or deboard the POS than a group of 2.

3. I think so.

4. Refuse to raise the seat rest. If the POS doesn't fit in the seat (like this), the FAs will notice and take action.

EWR-MIA is the maximum to allow such a thing.

I would ask the guy to put down the armrest. I guess FA wasn't aware you folks weren't traveling together which is why she/he didn't deal with it.
No offense to the POS but you didn't make him that way nor responsible for his comfort. We are too kind of a society sometimes as we talk/yap on Internet but face to face too concern to appear insensitive. I have had no problems stating I don't wish to sit next to dogs, refuse to change seats for families (no i will not give up my bulk head aisle seat for 24B adjacent to restroom, and obese and/or smelly people. I am not entitled but i thought ahead to buy my ticket and if I were last minute okay but i'm not so accommodate the other person.

i also have no problems putting on a surgical face mask if passengers nearby have persistent cough ailments. I'd rather offend them for 3-4 hrs vs. suffer illness from Amazon for 3-4 months.

I would just quietly accept it the same way I quietly accept the baby one row over, the lady with about 500% the allowed carry-on luggage, the drunk guy reeking of booze, the guy with smelly feet etc. etc. It's the luck of the draw. Though I go out of my way to avoid sitting next to anyone precisely because I know I will quietly accept every misfortune coming my way.

This is a very reasonable, mature way to handle the situation. It can be more embarrassing if you pretend to use the restroom so you can run to the FA instead.

A few years back I had to book a last minute (literally) flight as Houston was evacuated for the hurricane. The CO flight was completely full that night as the hurricane was about to hit the next day. I was lucky to get a middle seat, and as a very large man slid into the aisle seat, he apologized and said to let him know if I was uncomfortable. He told me he usually books F because of his size but this was the only seat he could get that night...he was also a last minute evacuee.

So your observation that people are aware of the discomfort they cause is often accurate, and I'm guessing they don't like pressing up against me for 2 hours any more than I do. Be an adult and suggest you both talk to the FA about a more comfortable situation.

A tip for all...

Many UA aircraft allow the outside aisle armrest to be lifted via a "secret" button or latch, usually on the underside of the arm rest towards the back. Better that the POS spill out into the aisle then into your seat. And then if this intrusion into the aisle presents a problem, the FA will readily handle it.

May not work every time, but it may save some...

Good attitude, and sort of the way I look at things. Play the cards you're dealt.

On my last 10+ hour flight in PMCO BF (777), I was seated in the center pair, row 8, and a young couple with a baby in the port pair changed the diaper of the kid twice on the flat bassinet area during the flight. I was sound asleep on the first go, and the stench shocked me awake. What happened to doing the decent thing and changing the kid in the amply large BF lavs with changing tables?

In addition, the mother didn't move the soiled diaper from the top of the seat for a few hours, and never went to the lav to wash her hands for the hour or so that it took me to doze off again. No wonder things like Ebola are spreading like wildfire, with even Yuppie, soccer-mom, poseurs exhibiting such poor hygiene.

Here is an oldie but a goodie

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-if55Agv1xF...an+airline.jpg

Are you a fan of the Ace Man? Because you used his "hey man" appeal for reasonable behavior in the exact same way he does.^

Did you think about raising the armrest between your seat and your girlfriend and sliding over some? Or swapping with her, and she sliding over towards you?

As a POS I know most of the tricks. I always book aisle seats, and always raise the aisle armrest. I can fit in a 17" seat, although my shoulders are definitely not built for it. If the aisle armrest doesn't come up, I'll tend to raise the center armrest a few inches or so, depending on the plane.

My experience with trying to offer advice in Economy is that it rarely goes well. I was flying to Vegas a few months ago, and there were two empty E+ seats. The middle next to me, and the aisle seat behind me. Some non-English speaking guy, easily 6'3 and and 250, comes up and grabs the middle seat. There was a girl and a mom in the row behind, so that aisle seat was the great one. I tried to tell the guy to grab the aisle seat as soon as the door closed, but he didn't understand, then said something along the lines of 'woman say I sit here". I was going to get up to move back, but the girl moved over the aisle (smart girl). It was on a slimline A320, so the armrest on the aisle goes up and I sat semi side saddle the whole way.

A lot of large people, like me, are aware of the situation, and we do all we can to mitigate the problem. Sometimes though, the big guy gets the middle seat next to you, and sometimes the hot blond chick who weighs 120 pounds gets the seat. If you're really lucky you get an empty seat next to you, though that is rare these days.

I used to never think about this stuff, when I was flying multiple times per week. Of course, you used to sometimes have a whole row to yourself, and I fondly remember getting ticked off on the rare occasion that someone actually took the middle seat next to you. Those days are gone and won't be coming back, and the airlines keep squeezing more passengers into a plane. It's only going to get worse.

You are suggesting, the OP and his girlfriend occupy 1.5-1.8 seats, and give the oversized pax 1.2-1.5 seats??? Seriously?

What other options are there? You can argue what should have been done, but with the plane in the air, options are limited. Either snuggle up with the oversized stranger or with the girlfriend. Your choice of two, pick one.