Time to Escalate My Level of Protest
 

As part of my job, I have to fly around 100K per year. Like any frequent flyer with a pulse, I detest all aspects of security theater. I always opt out of the WBI screening and choose the pat down. I have been subject to a wide range of pat downs, and they all suck.

My protests thus far have consisted of 1) letters to TSA, my representatives, and airline management and 2) direct, minor verbal disparagement of individual TSOs (e.g., "This is all a big joke." "Are you enjoying this as much as I am?" "Are you proud to tell people what you do all day?").

I have to fly out of BOS next week, and I am wondering what I can do to escalate my level of protest while still making my flights. I always arrive fairly early, so a 20-30 minute 'penalty box' delay is not a problem, but I don't want to get arrested.

Idea One: Dress in sweat pants, a t-shirt, and a Speedo. If selected for WBI, ditch the pants and shirt, and get my pat down in a Speedo and socks.

Idea Two: From the moment the pat down starts, sing. I'm saying sing in a conversational+ level voice that is not exactly disruptive, but is loud enough to be clearly seen as a protest. I'm thinking Journey's "Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin'" or John Mellencamp's "Hurt So Good."

Questions:
Can I get into trouble for either of these actions (i.e., is it legal)?

Does anyone have better ideas for appropriate songs?

Does anyone have any other ideas for escalated protest methods?

Wear sweat pants, go comando.

Wear a kilt.

Why not wait until they start to "go down there" and start singing one of the following:

Chorus from Men at Work's "Down Under"
Chorus from Michael Jackson's "Beat It"

You might also want to consider singing "Back in the USSR" as well.

Get their names. Write them down. Tell the LEO on site that you want to file a criminal complaint.

All good suggestions... here's my personal favorite

Waitresses - I Know What Boys Like
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5UX2afsTqFI

"I know what boys like
I know what guys want
I know what boys like, boys like, boys like me
But you, you're special
I might let you
You're so much different
I might let you
Mmmmm would you like that
I might let you "

This is not really a protest but I'm considering printing out a copy of the sexual offender registry and taking it with me to the airport. If I'm selected for a pat-down, I'll ask in a clear voice if I can first check to make sure the screener is not a registered sexual offender. In order to be sure I'd have to have the screener's full name and address to check against the list.

I too have considered stripping down to a pair of button-fly boxers and walking through security (basically walk up, take everything off and put it in a bin).

As long as your intimate parts are covered (Speedos would suffice) I'm not sure how much legal trouble you would get into. Check state statues about indecent exposure, particularly surrounding the intent (in this case, it could be argued you're removing clothing as a protest).

Remember, with anything you do at the CP, you need to make sure you're not doing anything that can be even loosely construed as interfering with screening operations -- that could really get you in trouble.

I'm thinking a long wrap skirt over a leotard and bike shorts....

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49 C.F.R. § 1540.109 Prohibition against interference with screening personnel.
Title 49 - Transportation

PART 1540—CIVIL AVIATION SECURITY: GENERAL RULES
Subpart B—Responsibilities of Passengers and Other Individuals and Persons

§ 1540.109 Prohibition against interference with screening personnel.

No person may interfere with, assault, threaten, or intimidate screening personnel in the performance of their screening duties under this subchapter.

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Ok, does the Speedo or singing qualify under "interfere with, assault, threaten, or intimidate"?

If ya got a big package that might intimidate the TSO.

Here is my suggestion: http://www.abcunderwear.com/elephant-thong.html


I think saying "touch my junk and I will have you arrested" would be considered to be intimidation. But I think "touch my junk and I will have an organism" would be considered free speech.

Rendon Case - Depressing
 

http://www.fedcrimlaw.com/visitors/p...05.html#Rendon

"The Rendon case is a depressing reminder of the officious, don’t-mess-with-the-Government world in which we live. In this case, the Sixth Circuit affirmed a $700 civil penalty that was imposed on a passenger who mouthed off to a Transportation Security Administration (TSA) screener at an airport. The decision seems to gloss over - if not totally ignore - the fact that our First Amendment rights are becoming more and more diminished by layers and layers of overly broad, vague and highly subjective administrative regulations that do little more than feed the already puffed-up self-importance of the legions of badge-wielding bureaucrats who now regulate so much of our lives."

This case is not entirely relevant. Mostly, the conclusion here is that a it's a bad idea to challenge opposing lawyers pro per. Something about a man representing himself has a fool for a client...

Also, this case is not about fourth amendment violations...

Or do both at the same time. :D The Journey song is perfect. ^



I seen guys wearing, uh, skimpy outfits at various airports around the country, even CLT.

Devo's "Whip It!": now whip it/into shape/shape it up/get straight/go forward/move ahead/try to detect it/it's not too late/to whip it/
whip it good

:eek:

Good choices! I'll know another FTer is around when I hear these songs at the C/P! :)