Fun with Nude-o-Scope
 

so, wouldn't it be fun to stuff a large kielbasa in your pants then resist the metal detector and be forced to go through the nude-o-scope? There's no law saying you can't travel with kielbasa, you know..

Well, if you're insecure about your 'goods' you could always look at this:

http://xkcd.com/779/

Perhaps this scene could be updated. :D

Dude that would be bringing un-necessary attention to an area of your body that you dont want.

Or necessary attention that TSA has a thing for people's crotches now.. @:-)

I'm thinking wearing some Depends and crapping them would make for a very nice uncomfortable experience for the screeners.

i think i'll find a material that the WBI can't penetrate (a thicker rubber, or possibly metal bedazzler stuff) with the words "Fark You TSA" or "if you can read this you owe me dinner".
Also a large brass "male enhancer ring" would be in order, it is a medical device.

The TSA's attention to crotches must be brought to the flying public's attention - only when they fully understand will there be hope of ending this farce.

Well, people usually obsess about what they don't have... Maybe TSA has more than one Rolando Negrin? :D

I haven't heard otherwise yet, but leather underwear will certainly annoy the perv working the booth.

so leather pants and a leather shirt should do just fine then?

Leather wont work.

There I fixed it for you.^ Both the Rapiscan and the L3 cannot see through leather, being much more dense than skin. They WILL see the leather, but nothing beyond. Check it out yourself.

However, foil and conductive fabrics will completely foil the L3 (but not the Rapiscan), as the microwave cannot penetrate and will reflect back 100%. This would make more comfortable anti-ait clothes, as soon as they outlaw the "Walls of Cancerous Death" machines for their cancer-causing qualities.

Either way, you're gonna get the frank and bean massage, but probably not for long.

In other words, lamé. So that's it, leather and lamé. We need to look like we just stepped out of a disco.

A coworker of mine recently took a trip through a strip search scanner. He is NOT a FT type of guy and probably hasn't been on a plane for 6-8 years. A divorcée and non-custodial parent of an 8 year old son he had an opportunity to take his young son on a week long vacation somewhere. The 8 year old boy chose Washington DC over Disney World as a destination. The coworker of course talked extensively with me as the resident "travel guy" at the office before his trip and I mentioned the new strip search scanners and made sure he knew about his right to opt-out. Well, after an awesome week in Washington DC with his son, they encountered a strip search scanner at DCA (I think, could have been some other DC area airport). They were directed to be strip searched. He said he opted his young son out and when they tried to pitch how innocuous the machine was he told them he would go through it but not his son. The boy was sent off to be fondled. (not sure what is worse for a young boy, being strip searched or being fondled) and the father went in the strip search scanner. When he was instructed to assume the submissive posture, he said he first adjusted his junk Michale Jackson style, then looked strait at the TSA guy, smiled, and told him "Don't worry guys, I've got a bigger d**k than any one of you" and completed his scan. He said the TSA guy tasked with fondling his son did it as professionally as anyone possibly could, marching with orders from above to fondle young children attempting to board a plane so no horror stories about how his kid was treated beyond the procedure itself. So in the end, after a week in DC the child got a comprehensive civics lesson about the highest ideals America purports to espouse as well as the current actual state of affairs and dad got in a classic one liner.

For the rest of you miscreants..... http://shop.ebay.com/i.html?_nkw=scrap+metal+letters;):D

At least no one has ever accused you of being opinionated :rolleyes:

But it's factual. Just Google Rolando Negrin. :)

The short story, I'm sure, is that the more "respect mah autoritay" a TSA screener is, the smaller his "endowment". ;)