I'd like to add a 9th criterion:

9) Male


While that might seem very politically incorrect, absolutely none of the terrorist attacks has been planned or executed by women according to all media and governmental sources.

I have no issue with the hand checking of any carry-on or checked-in luggage. But there is no logical national security excuse for groping female passengers.

I've seen way too many females getting the search. The whole system seems misguided.

Many of my flights are short haul on Southwest and my solution is to drive.

Lots of screeners are reveling in the ability to engage in a little class warfare, taking special joy in beating up on anyone who looks like a business traveler. I love how they yell at the lines of passengers drill-sergeant style. I openly laugh at them as they walk by yelling. Also highly recommended is taking names and writing letters -- especially for the patting-down offenses mentioned here. I find that "excuse me, can I see the name on your badge please?" said while holding a pad and pen does wonders.

To end on a positive note, however, has anyone noticed that the parking lot car screeners at SJC are extremely professional, thorough, and polite? Wish those same folks worked at the gates.

Agreed -- the SJC parking lot screeners are quite polite and professional. But I would be more enthusiastic about them if they hadn't left my trunk in such a mess after they went through it.

well, since i started this, i should give you all an update.

mrs. duxfan and i flew NW from CLE-MSP-PDX this weekend. had some interesting observations:

1. i was taken aside at the security screening for a secondary check at CLE. however, the guard was trying to get me to leave my briefcase, suitcase, and tray with cell phone on the belt while he did it. he kept asking me to step away from the x-ray machine while the other "guard" was running something back and forth, preventing me from retrieving my items. after the 3rd time he tried to get me to step away, i told him that "under no terms will i step away from my bags." he then picked my bags up off the belt, took them to the table nearby, and gave me the frisking of a lifetime, including the belt! didn't open my bags tho.

NW at CLE was the most efficient by far. they called everyone who was "randomly selected for a further screening" before boarding had started, took them out of the way of the boarding process, and violated their privacy there.

3. At MSP, it was different. no one called in advance. when FC boarding was called, mrs. duxfan started heading for the gate. i saw what was going to happen and grabbed her. i then saw the security guard tag the person who got to be the first to board. we walked by.

3. at PDX on the return, i got tagged for the first time. some had been called in advance, i got tagged as we were boarding. and since the NW agent never bothered to offer preboarding for FC, i was just a face in the throng. myself and two people behind me. of course, i was the only one with full carry on luggage. (briefcase and suitcase) full wand and pat down treatment. followed by a search (i wouldn't call it thorough) of my briefcase. this is where i had a problem. i was told that i could not help the agent open the compartments on my bag. nor could i help her as she fumbled around with the small camera bag i had inside my briefcase, which had my $800 digital camera. i just had to "stand right there sir". then watch the same thing as they pawed thru my suitcase.

then, to make matters more interesting, they let the people on line for a search behind me board the airplane because my search was taking too long. we must have be too clse to the newly scheduled departure time. to quote the agent directly, "its not necessary". if it's not necessary, why did we start it to begin with!?!?!?!!?

one thing i noticed in MSP. i noticed that it was not necessarily a "security guard" doing the searches at the gate. in many cases, it was a NW ramper in their grey and red uniform. are we deputizing rampers to works as guards now?

the whole experience left a bitter taste in my mouth. a screener can by anybody, and they can be looking for anything. or nothing, because they don't know what to look for? there appear to be no standards in place, and i did not feel any more or less safe.

IMHO, the searches at the gate are intrusive, and serve no other use than to make people FEEL more secure. it does nothing to actually improve security. there is no IDENTIFIED THREAT! either announce an identified threat, and look for it, or quit the "random" searches of people who meet no criteria for further searches.

this will make me stop flying when i can drive. i had less difficulty flying internationally last month than i have flying domestic this month. and my passport has stamps from both khazakstan and uzbekistan from earlier this year. you'd think i'd have more trouble getting on an international flight!

i'll get off my soapbox now.... thanks for listening...

i agree, it's totally out of control. the other day at ORD, i was "randomly" chosen for an additional search prior to boarding, along with three other people. the "security" guard was this big fat guy, and he was pretty gruff. he wanded me, then went through my briefcase. i had just been to macdonalds, and he searched my macdonalds bag!! it doesnt stop there - he ate about five fries, and TOOK A BITE OF MY BIG MAC SANDWICH telling me that it's all routine, and he has to make sure there is nothing hidden in between the all-beef patties or the sesame-seed bun. then, after taking a huge draught on my coke, he said, "you're all set!" and i could board. as i was collecting myself, i noticed that everyone chosen for the extra screening had a fast food bag as well!!! IT'S INSANE! i talked to the others, and it turns out that he ate a little bit of everyone's food except the guy that had been to cinnabon.

http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif

He should have punched you in the mouth and told you to "Have a nice day" too.

Two questions for the legal eagles reading:
at what point does some of the conduct described here become simple assault, and,
regarding the last absurdity, at what point does such conduct become petty theft?

Perhaps we, the abused and offended, should
delay our departure and call for the law.

Incidents like this one surely will be few and far between but it is up to us, the customers, to insist on a reasonable standard
of profesionalism and this incident certainly is not that. There must be supervisory people somewhere near and to ask for their intervention is quite reasonable.


[This message has been edited by nathan detroit (edited 12-04-2001).]

homey, thanks for the report. I don't know whether to laugh or cry!

What should one do? Call over the national guard and make a complaint? What's the best measure here? I personally would be very irratated if they take a bite out of my child's pizza.

I don't mind reasonable searches but where is the professionalism? The attitude of some of these people is so hostile and aggressive, others seem to be on a power trip looking to have a good time at a passengers expense. If they are going to use these $7 an hour bozos then at least have one highly paid supervisor at each station so that there will be someone there with some common sense to keep things in line. While I was into flying allot after 9/11 to support American Airlines, my experiences with security in the US (I fly to Europe allot, mostly the UK, and there they seem to have no problem getting people who can act with a professional attitude) have been unpleasant to say the least only because of the attitude of the security personel and not the searches which I welcome as I think most of us do if they are done in a reasonable and professional manner.

I think Homey is kidding. I sure hope so.

I dunno what I'd do if it were me. It wouldn't be good though. I honestly think I'd get violent at that point. Actually trying to steal from me while I'm standing there? Whoo boy.

Regards,
-Bouncer-

Maybe this is the wrong forum, but....

I just heard from a friend who travels world-wide, that you should not have batteries in your cameras, etc., as they will be confiscated?

All the electronics of my camera are linked to the battery. Do I really need to remove it and reprogram the camera when I get to my final destination?

Tom

Aside from the cocky smiley face, I know you're kidding because the FIRST thing anyone would eat is the Cinnabon! A little too sugary, but those things are irresistible.

I flew out of Manchester NH a week ago. I did not set off the detector, but I was subjected to a wanding and a full body pat by a female security guard. I averted my eyes because I was embarrassed, and she ordered me to keep looking straight at her. I am 5 feet tall, petite, and in my late thirties. I was also wanded and patted (less thoroughly) by a male guard on the return flight out of Orlando. He was very polite, but I'm beginning to think the "petite woman" theory mentioned above might just be true!

homey, you win the prize. Good one!!!