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I have noticed that, in general, whenever anyone asks whether it's ethically acceptable to do something, the answer is always no. If you have to ask, it's probably not OK.
And no, I wouldn't even think of doing it. |
The metaphors with "money in bank" or a "non-working car" are not applicable to this case because the miles expire. If you wake up tomorrow the car will remain in the garage, money will be in the bank, but the airlines will take the miles away. So by not acting in this case, you are only helping the airline reduce their liability.
That said, what somebody does with his miles is his business. You can reason with the friend to give it to you for something in exchange,or give it to charity or buy magazine subscriptions to your local school or library. Taking his miles without his consent is pure and simple thievery. |
while i tend lean to the abnormally moral side when it comes to ethics,i think my only question on this one would be...was the owner of the points in question a bin hog? if so, then yes'd I'd take his friggin' points ;)
just kidding...i think....let me get back to you on that...i need to have a chat with my moral compass.... |
come on people, think out of the box!
Ahh, easy to figure out right away!
This one makes me think of ONE thing where it can be considered less than just plain wrong, and almost way right!: An ugly divorce! I ain’t saying that's what it is, but come on people, if the X was a real jerk and you had a horrid break up, then this could be a good thing! Here is the example: Someone dear to me, let's call him George, did have such a problem. His X wife, let's call her Elaine, was a real loser. She didn't even ever know what miles were when they were together, and certainly never appreciated all the tickets he got the family when scrambling around to do business or leisure travel. This Elaine character was snobby, unforgiving, unhappy, unloving, and just plain stupid about a lot of other things that would obviously make decent reasons for the break up. But George is a good man who simply made the wrong choices in his life for those few years these two were together. He tried and tried to make it work and when they had a child, well, he did all the work to bring that kid along (and of course, set him up with a little FF account or three as well!) Anyway, when he finally figured out he should end it all (and found her doing the nasty with his x-best friend from school anyway) he realized that he had been the one to set up all the family airline miles accounts! And he had the PINs and all the other info too. Now they weren’t some wealthy or well-to-do Hollywood tabloid couple that some hot shot lawyer from Hollywood knew enough or cared enough to include some 1,500,000 Delta miles into their divorce, no, instead it was merely about alimony or some other possessions, and George gladly dealt with this. He is done with Elaine, but man, was the woman a piece of work! To this day the whole thing haunts him and yet he does everything right when it comes to paying the bill and taking care of the kid... But he has access to those miles. She doesn’t even care to know what they are or how to use a PC! So he uses them. Who will ever really know in their case? Does the airline need to know? Does the X need to know? I sure would if it happened to me! ...and so should any of you divorcees out there feeling a bit burned once and a while. As long as they don’t know about it, it certainly IS right, in terms of the highest rule on earth: The ones set forth by the HEART! I seriously doubt Elaine is reading this now. She was a Russian bride who just wanted the green card anyway! You gonna tell on me? No, you are not. |
Sounds like a divorce to me, as well.
But here's a new wrinkle ... if the couple married in a community property jurisdiction, such as in Californnia or South Africa the miles would be deemed to be held in community. I believe it's incumbent upon each party not to waste the community assets ... However, this is a large issue to any FT'er and it is hard to believe it would slip the mind of an FT'er going through a divorce. Certainly my property settlement dealt with this very same scenario and I enjoyed free first class travel during TWA's last years. But I certainly did not rub my ex's nose it it ... The only approach I would counsel is wait for the other party to make a request you are able to grant and ask for the quid pro quo. |
Part of ownership of property is being able to do what you wish with the property. No one should infringe on that right just because the property will be "wasted".
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if the x was a jerk and knows nothing about miles, and you set him or her up with all of them anyway and he or she really screwed up your life and you hate her and you feel she or he owes you and you have a chance to do this, I still say do it!
If it is a friend who has no time or inclination to work on a soon to expire account and you have been pushing him to do it but he still wont, and then you go in and use all the miles that are about to expire tomorrow and then send him a check for say, $500, then can he be mad at you? Gee, I hope not! There are morals, ethics and rules, but man, there's also discretion and human reality! Take the miles. |
I still say not to do it.
I understand the divorce situation, having been divorced myself (but fortunately without the acrimony I've seen in other situations). One is tempted to do unethical things for revenge. Understanding the motivation for an unethical act, perhaps even sympathizing with it, does not make the act ethical. Getting at the miles also involves claiming to be someone you're not. That's unethical any way you look at it, especially when it's done only for personal gain and/or revenge. In another recent thread, which some people reading this may have also seen, I posted a minority opinion that it's OK to take opened (not still sealed, therefore heading for the trash as soon as the cabin cleaning crew arrives) amenity kits that have been left behind by others who deplaned previously if one plans to use or donate their contents. Why is this case, IMHO, different? Because that one involves a physical resource, of which our dear planet has a finite quantity. Using something that would otherwise go into a landfill is a positive contribution. Airline miles are not a physical object, did not use resources, and will not create more trash if wasted. And taking an unsealed amenity kit doesn't involve impersonating anyone. |
Ethics aside, don't you think this person will realize what you did, especially as you've expressed an interest in them, and set you up for a whole 'nother world of problems? They will get a statement, you know, showing those miles as having been used ...
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Originally Posted by letiole
Ethics aside, don't you think this person will realize what you did, especially as you've expressed an interest in them, and set you up for a whole 'nother world of problems? They will get a statement, you know, showing those miles as having been used ...
Statements are often electronic anyway. I know that right now, my wife, who knows of miles and has many of them, has no clue of exactly how many she has. It is me who manages the accounts of these things in my family. I do 90% of this online and the occassional mailing goes to me as well. In fact, I manage them for my own mother and when she wants to fly, I help her pick the airline. Our family basically shares them all too. When dad died, I managed those accounts and had the airlines transfer to people in the family based on what they had. Mom provided the executor statement to me and told me to take it all over for the family. One brother was a DL flyer so he got all those points, the other a CO flyer, and I was AA so I got all those, and so forth... Mom got the starwood points and there had been many. She would get the mail on airline or hotel stuff from dad's accounts and give it to me. She now has the Amex too and gets more. She has no idea how many and still likes to write them checks to pay the bill. I tell her how many points she has when we meet and she sometimes passes it off as trivial. Yet, when it comes time to stay somewhere she likes this info! I know my mother has no idea, nor does she really concern herself with who has what because she knows my brothers and I will share awards when needed. My wife and my mother just let me do all this stuff and my brothers love to hear about the easy promos they can do with less effort than an average FT addict may be used to. I do know this: If my wife and I ever got divorced, she'd probably let me have all the miles or use of her accounts (in fact, our arguements would be about miles and that would be why she left me--hee hee hee) But I know this because she cares less about them than I do. She would go back and live on the farm where people dont fly that much anyway. ha ha ha I'd just be out of luck all across the board because she is a great girl and I would not want to ever lose her! Well, it wont happen, but each couple has their own thang... |
Marathon Man: Assuming this is a divorce and knowing that the ex has already expressed a deep interest in the miles and that the break up appears to not be a real harmonious one, I would think the ex would be very vigilant about checking on these miles in the future. What is it they say about a woman scorned? :p
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Originally Posted by letiole
Marathon Man: Assuming this is a divorce and knowing that the ex has already expressed a deep interest in the miles and that the break up appears to not be a real harmonious one, I would think the ex would be very vigilant about checking on these miles in the future. What is it they say about a woman scorned? :p
But this aint about me... the X in question is in fact someone who really shouldn’t even exist. She is evil incarnate and she even knows it. She married the "George" in my initial divorce scenario because, at that time in his life, he had just come back from a war zone, was depressed, and living in a former soviet block country working there all off hours. She was, as he claims, the only person who understood him and he let things go further than they should have. They had a kid, decided to get married, and then, when George started to come back to the smiley old self he always had been in life, she still was the dark, Goth, depressed and cynical THING of a woman that later deteriorated into something evil incarnate. She would do what she could to try to wreck his life and all he did was try to work things out. The kid suffered thru much of this but eventually they went to court to get divorced. Russian law is archaic but they did come to an agreement to share visits, etc. She used her green card status to get to this country and now travels with the likes of a diplomat who abuses his power and certainly wrecked his friendship with George by screwing the then wife, now X! Now the kid lives here with George but eh still has to pay her $$$ and rolls his eyes whenever the subject of THE THING comes up! You know that Russian theater hostage thing a couple years ago in Moscow? There are some who know George who constantly say thing like, I really wish if anyone we knew had to die in there, it would be her. But she lives on, appearing once and a while mocking life and using her almost well crafted position to exploit the system more than you and I could ever find any cool loophole in some miles gig! She got the green card, got the alimony, got someone to take care of the kid, travels the world, and has no job or responsibilities! She knows not of miles, trust me. But oh, in the dying years of their relationship, he did fly with her to family or islands in hopes to do what normal men might do to attempt to fix, rebuild, help and just plain love her. They got miles and all, but man, does he still feel the pain of this or what! He is a good man. You know, some of them are! I say he deserves ever last mile he can scam from those old accounts he set up and if that's the only technically wrong thing he ever does, then who the heck cares! Based on the above, I bet the karma people would even agree! nuf said. Ya'll know my stance on this one. ;)MM |
Well, in that case perhaps he should go to immigration and explain that she never loved him, only used him to get into this country to commit dastardly deeds that would put our nation at risk and needs to be deported immediately. In fact, he should tell the whole sordid story about how the Russian mafia blackmailed him into marrying her - the security of the U.S. was at stake. Clearly this guy was a hero who saved us all and now all he wants is some measly miles. To hell with miles, no doubt in exchange for the information the U.S. will give him his own plane and a new identity in case she comes back looking for revenge. :eek:
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Originally Posted by letiole
Well, in that case perhaps he should go to immigration and explain that she never loved him, only used him to get into this country to commit dastardly deeds that would put our nation at risk and needs to be deported immediately. In fact, he should tell the whole sordid story about how the Russian mafia blackmailed him into marrying her - the security of the U.S. was at stake. Clearly this guy was a hero who saved us all and now all he wants is some measly miles. To hell with miles, no doubt in exchange for the information the U.S. will give him his own plane and a new identity in case she comes back looking for revenge. :eek:
In the meantime, she will end up like this bloke: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...bin_laden_mask :)MM |
Originally Posted by Marathon Man
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So he uses them. Who will ever really know in their case? Does the airline need to know? Does the X need to know? I sure would if it happened to me! ...and so should any of you divorcees out there feeling a bit burned once and a while. As long as they don’t know about it, it certainly IS right, in terms of the highest rule on earth: The ones set forth by the HEART! Your arguement is so wrong from so many ethics standpoints. Even OP started with "I know this is wrong". |
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