On a recent SFO-JFK flight on AA, the purser made these announcements (and I'm not exaggerating, either!):

"Please direct your attention to the monitors in your cabin for a brief but important video about safety on this Boeing 767-300 aircraft. All passengers are required to watch these instructions and this will necessitate putting away newspapers and magazines for the duration of the video."

and

"Ladies and gentlemen, the captain has turned on the Fasten Seat Belt sign. All passengers must return to their seats at once and remain there until the Fasten Seat Belt sign is no longer illuminated. I'd like to remind everyone that disregarding the instructions of or interfering with a member of a flight crew is a federal offense punishable by a fine and/or imprisonment."

Now there's a guy who takes his job seriously!

Heard on a holiday-season flight on Alaska Airlines:

The usual safety announcement was read and then "oh, and folks, we'd also like to remind you that upon landing in Seattle you may notice tons and tons of mistletoe hanging at the gates of our competitors. The reason it's there is just to remind you that when you fly our competition, you can just plan on kissing your luggage goodbye..."

On Southwest, once my plane was in the command of "Captain Steubing" ... another time it was under the command of "Captain Fantastic"

I have heard the announcement "primarily for your safety and will consider reasonable requests etc.) many a time on AA on my 100+ http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/frown.gif segments this year. I have also heard the pilots mention the "F/A's are here primarily for your safety" spiel during their greeting from the cockpit.

They say "FAs are here primarily for your safety" all the time, but I've definitely never heard "consider any reasonable request". That just sounds mean.

"Cross-check and verify the strap"

Quote:

---

...but will consider any reasonable requests for service.

---

That makes me wonder what they consider unreasonable? Probably anything that makes them pay attention to the passengers instead of continuing their gabfest with the other FA's. http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/frown.gif

And jAAck posts Or a guy on a power trip! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif