Treated Poorly -- what should i do
 

Ok, this is late and im so furious right now... so please excuse me if this post is a bit all over the place..

a lil segway into the story..

i stay at the rochester airport marriott.. in rochester ny, ive been here for about a month and tomorrow is my last day on the project... my team of 7 or 8 are here with their last day being tomorrow as well... while the whole project spans about 70 people and theyre booked for the next year... the girls at the front desk are young, my age, and flirty.. naturally .. im easily amused so i return the flirtiness...

as i stated before..tomorrow is my last day.. i checked in on tuesday and asked the girls if they wanted to come out with my colleagues and i since it was our last night.. no biggy..no harm.. no foul.. no nothing..they said yah sure.. no problem.. let me add that ive asked these females to come out before afterwork and theyve gracefully said no.. i didnt make a big deal out of it .. i dont care.. whatever

admist the check in, the girl obviously side tracked forgot to ask me for my platinum gift.. i m new to the welcome gift game so i went to the front desk and was like, do i get a 100 bux.. shes like omg i forgot, me concerned.. reply with if you get in trouble dont worry about it.. i dont want you to get fired.. she went and got my bag from the weekend closet.. me naturally concerned asked the other female if she was going to get fired.. she replied with its happened before but they wont fire her.. i believe everyone makes mistakes... and i told her.. i dont want it if youre going to get in trouble.. shes like its already in the system..

fast forward to today, i come back to the hotel this evening.. and quickly change to go to the gym before they close.. so im in my gym clothes and i run back down and drop by the front desk.. i see an unusually rather large staff crowd at the front desk and im getting some wierd looks.. whatever... no problem..

i politely ask, i think there is a 100 dollars waiting for me.. and everyone points to this front desk manager.. and he wants to have a word with me.. fine whatever.. im like just give me money and let me go.. he asks me to sit down in the lobby in front of the whole staff and roaming customers... he makes me sign some piece of paper acknowledging that i got the money .. no problem.. ive never done that before but whatever.. before he hands me money.. he says "we have a problem".. im like "uh is that girl gonna get in trouble," hes like "yah".. then i was like "i dont want the money if people are going to get in trouble".. he cuts me off and says thats not the problem and asks me to sit down.. he started to go on with there are "allegations, maybe it was a miscommunication that you made unwanted passes at certain girls and it needed to stop" or something like that.. im like ok whatever.. i need to go to the gym.. so i take my money and go..he asks me if it was my last night here.. and asked if i was ever coming back.. im like no... he then goes on to patronize me "thanks, we try to take care of our platinum customers..."

it boiled me to beyond extremes that i couldnt even finish my work out at the gym...

i returned to the hotel and gave him a piece of mind .. there was some vulgarity, i admit fault and he apologized but it was so pathetic and insincere it was an absolute joke...

now before anyone goes on saying you deserved it.. let me just say this.. i have never EVER touched any of the females where as numerous colleagues have seen them come to my room, hand deliver me notes, and even put their arms around me in the lobby... fine.. its flirting no big deal.. no interaction besides the one instance where a note was hand delievered to my room has happened outside of the front desk... i ve never even asked for a phone number..

the thing that infuriates me.. he is a front desk manager who knew that my "friendliness" was an accusation.. i believe he shouldve taken the conversation to an office and not publicized the whole thing in front of the whole hotel.. the whole hotel staff looks at me like im some kind of pervert now...he told me to sit down, like im his son... and made it out to be some lecture..while everyone was looking at me knowing what was going on... and then finally to patronize me by thanking me for my platinum business was the final straw

how does someone in hospitality MANAGEMENT do this.. ? i am all for protecting your employees, i commend him for doing that.. but you do not do it in a public forum if you know "its a miscommunication," take me to an office.. i asked him about that and he said "it was occupied".. whatever...

ive debated on whether to go to my project manager and let him know what happened so he can pull the 60+ people from there.. ive debated on whether to go the general manager but in an instance like this.. where they make me out to be some perv.. think shell naturally side with her..

i dont want points.. i want action..this man humilated me in front of everyone talking to me in such a condescending manner...when he knew he only had one side of the story.. what should i do.. who should i go to ?

Well, I definitely agree that there was miscommunication and poor judgement involved here, however, in my opinion, it was attributed to both sides here, being yourself and on the part of the staff. While your privacy should definitely have been respected, I don't really know that you have a major leg to stand on here in any respect to receiving anything more than a mere apology from MI as it would be deemed inappropriate (especially in a professional setting) to repeatedly ask the hotel employees to join you for an evening out especially after having been declined (I'm assuming on numerous occasions). The repeated invitations could be construed (and possibly what led to the accusations in the first place) as a proposition for interest beyond just a drink in the bar, and perhaps the employees agreed just to get you to quit asking? Again, while your privacy should have been respected, a manager's first priority is to investigate the accusation while at the same time ensuring the safety of his or her employees, even if this means taking adversive action that may later prove to have been unnecessary. Even as a frequent traveller in my [very] early 20's, as in all business aspects, I make it a point never to make a pass on someone who is acting in the capacity of their job. If I run across them in a bar or out and about, then sure, say what you will, but my general rule is on duty, off limits. So instead of seeking compensatory damages, which I don't see as very forthcoming, I would instead use this as a learning lesson to keep business and pleasure as far separate as you can (and just be glad that the employee just reported it to her manager instead of pursuing legal action).

Yes, you deserved it.

Fraternization of the hotel employees and guests is strictly forbidden by almost any hotel. Some hotels have rules that no employee is even allowed on the property unless they are on duty.

I don't know what you said, but if it got to the point where the employees complained to their manager, you must have made them very uncomortable. If the manager had not acted, they probably would have had grounds for a lawsuit.

Marriott's policy is that employees may not be on property (does not include the parking lot) more than 20 (I believe, may be 30) minutes prior to their shift starting or after their shift ends. The policy also prohibits employees from being on site when not scheduled for work or attending a job-related function (meaning employees cannot stay at the property for which they work). There are a few occasions for which this rule is bent (such as an early afternoon meeting, when the hotel may allow the night audit crew to catch a few hours of sleep in one of their vacant rooms) but in no situation do I think exceptions are made for, as keeton made mention of, fraternization between hotel employees and guests. In fact, if it is determined that the employees also returned flirtatious gestures with you and your colleagues, their jobs will probably be terminated.

Well, even if the manager felt that there was legitimate reason to suspect you of inappropriate behavior or sexual harassment or whatever, he absolutely should not have held that conversation with you in such a public place in such a humiliating fashion. On this count I agree 100% with you. What I would probably do is write a complaint letter to the hotel chain and see how they respond. I would emphasize the unnecessary humiliation inflicted by the manager rather than the details of the accusation or your response to it.

And if I wasn't happy with the response, and if I had a good relationship with my boss, I would discuss with my boss the possibility of shifting all of the company's business away from that hotel.

Hmmmm-a traveling buisinessman flirting with the help :eek:Heavens forfend!Say it isn't so!
A chimp who forgot procedure because they were flustered by the advances of this scoundrel! :eek:
Same chimp digging up a "but he was soooooooo gross with his trying to hook up that I gave him his hundred bucks just to go away"defense when asked about it by management!?! :eek:

All parties acted badly in this.
You are due nothing as compensation,stop flirting with the staff.
Chimp was wrong-but learn to be a gentleman and you will not have these problems.You are there on buisiness-act like a professional.

Chimp in Charge was way out of line.

Unless you want to get a reputation of being trouble do not persue this with your superiors-it will reflect very badly on you and not on the hotel.

First of all it doesn't sound like they told you specifically what you were being accused of. That would have been my first question to them.

The flirting probably had somethign to do with it.

Regarding fraternization... I have gone out to lunch and dinner, and also gone skiing with hotel employees on numerous occasions and they never eluded that it was inappropriate or that it would jeopardize their job. I have been frequenting this hotel for 150+ nights over 10 years and many of the people there I consider friends, and there has never been any flirting invloved. Keeton, is your statement based on fact or speculation? I sure don't want anyone to lose their job.

I'll be Flamed but I feel the OP had no right to the $100 as they were definitely part of distracting the Employee. Since the OP has been staying at the Hotel for a month already and it seems never posted where they forgot about mentioning it to them, Id say dont distract teh Employee and if they forget to offer it thats 1 thing, distracting them with whatever discussion started by the Guest and continued by the Guest, should void asking for the $$$.

Otherwise Guests will come to the FD as they check-in and start with the 1000 questions in order to distract the employee.

had it been me no way would I have asked for the $100, but then again no way would I have been hitting on the Employees no matter how hot or not they were

I agree here with you. I have envoked the guarantee only a very few times. And almost any hotel that I tend to frequent, it would have to be a really major issue before I would envoke it.

But I want to expand on your first point a little. I almost always tend to talk to the check-in person (no I don't flirt, I don't think it would do my ego much good to have them laugh in my face or have to deal with my wife later. ;) ). I have found that if I can start a nice discussion and even get the front desk person to smile or laugh at something, my chances of an upgrade or a perk just went up. Now I do recognize that in this particular case the front desk person may have interpreted the conversation more strongly than an innocent flirt. I guess the issue is that normal conversation and questions shouldn't be any issue and if they "distract" the check-in person, then maybe that person is in the wrong job.

And while I wouldn't have put it quite the way bigguyinpasadena put it, I do tend to agree that both parties have some fault in this matter.

Just call your Platinum Customer Service number. Calmly and nicely explain your side of events focusing on the fact that you had built a friendlt rapport with the front desk staff and as it was your last stay there, you wanted to take them for a drink as a thank you. Somehow, this was misconstrued as something much more sinister and when management approached you about it, the manager did it in a tactless and humiliating way that damaged your good reputation and character. You expect an apology and this manager to go to some sensitivity training. Then drop it.

One of my BIGGEST pet peeves about FTers are the ones that love to point fingers and make stupid remarks like "Yes, You deserved it." You weren't there. You have no clue what intentions the OP has. Since when did giving the benefit of the doubt get overruled and replaced with attacking the FlyerTalker and assuming they are guilty and evil-doers.
The OP is just looking to be heard and receive advice on what he could do next. Those silly judgmental comments that are made do no good to the OP or any other reader of this thread.

Spot on.

I always see these "going to talk to my boss and maybe pull our business from the hotel". I wonder how often the boss actually cares enough about 1 experience to pull 60 people from a hotel?

Luckily for me, on most projects, I'm by myself so I make the decision. But I just can't see a PM wasting the time in finding a new hotel and getting everyone to use it over a bad incident or two (even more so when they have been at the hotel for some time already presumably without incident).

Just seems like an idle threat to make the person feel better.

I agree with bigguyinpasadena. ^ That pretty much sums it up for me.

Not having been there and knowing exactly what happened, you did say that a note was hand delivered to your room. You didn't exactly "deserve it". I for one very much dislike the kind of condescending talk form some schmuck full of self-importance, especially when it is public. (Last time I had such a "talk" was with some brainless TSA humanoid in OGG. In his ego trip he called a supervisor who called his supervisor who eventually told him that the guy was wrong and to let me go. No apology, of course.:rolleyes:) The front desk lady clearly lied in trying to cover herself somehow. All parties had some fault in the matter and as such your best option would be to drop it.

My advice: just drop it; I can't see you really getting anywhere with this. You might wanna consider toning down your flirting on future occasions. Sure, it's exciting, but as you can see sometimes it can lead to trouble and you risk losing all credibility.

I wasn't there (last stayed in that property about six years ago) and, I don't know any of the parties involved, so I'm making no judgements one way or the other.

What I would suggest (and what I "preach" when conducting a developmental class comprised of newly identified "fast-trackers"), is that not only should one not be guilty of improprieties, but also that it's just as important, in this day and age of not, despite the best of intentions, even appearing to commit one.

My statement was based on personal aquaintences with those in the industry and confirmed by bulldoggolfer05.

I have also had brushings with sexual harassment HR cases and the actions being taken by the GM seemed to fall in line with SOP in dealing with those kinds of issues.