Is a ryokan a must-do?

I tend to avoid ryokans in Tokyo, Kyoto, and Hakone. I favor more secluded onsens and also think the ones in Tokyo, Kyoto, and Hakone offer poor value for the price. Many famous luxury ryokans also seem to take themselves a little too seriously and rely on reputation. I have advised friends who haven't visited an onsen town to hit up Hakone in a smaller hotel, not a cement jungle, to experience an onsen town between Tokyo and Kyoto. Give the options, I'd probably go with Miyajima near Hiroshima if you like slow paced quiet nightlife.

As an aside, how rural was the one in Tohoku? There's a historical one with white colored water which gets a lot of international and domestic exposure. I couldn't take a picture of the bath but did take a picture of the parking lot... Three huge tour buses. The changing rooms were small and crowded. The baths were packed. It did have docomo/softbank cell coverage. It probably didn't have a lot of insulation or noise blockers. That's definitely a ryokan I was happy to have passed over for an overnight stay in favor of one 20 min drive away in more modern facilities with a reservable private onsen. Now that I think of it, neighborhood ofuro were probably crowded like this when homes didn't have their own baths. Authentic, yes, but not my kind of ryokan.

For such a whirlwind tour of Japan I would give the ryokan a miss. I actually enjoyed the ryokan and onsen we visited when we lived in Japan, especially Hanfubuki on the Izu peninsula which was wonderful. Found it here on FT in fact: http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/japan...n-all-one.html

Thanks so much! I am definitely leaning no now, given the caveat you pointed out. If I'm paying $600 for one night, I think I'd be setting us up for disappointment.

Sounds like you are doing too much. Maybe do 3 nights Tokyo. 2 Nights Kyoto (in a Ryokan that has a flexible meal plan) and end with 2 nights Tokyo.

We're splurging for the Hakone Ginyu for 1 night. Its 80,000 yen for 2 of us, but like they say, when in rome..

if i was going to splurge i would rather try the Hoshinoya Tokyo or Aman tokyo personally.

For luxury ryokans try https://www.ryokancollection.com/

We stayed at Gora Kadan for one night (which was enough to get the experience). It was great, but it was expensive.

Love the Intercontinental Strings Hotel, on 24th-37th floors of a high rise next to Shinagawa rail and subway station. Typical small but super comfortable rooms. Great breakfast (especially when it is completely light outside at 4:30 am ... you'll be ready when buffet opens at 7...though the wait is hard)

Stayed there almost 20 times on business trips. Always dependable.

But visiting onsen resorts...I was not willing to scrub down standing up nude in front of hundreds of other guest just for the right to enter hot spring pool....

Loads of good advice in the preceding messages. If you are just nervous about not being sure what to do and likely to make cultural mistakes don't worry. IMHO the only rule you need to be sure of before getting there is whatever you do, don't walk on the tatami (floor covering) in your shoes. Everything else sorts itself out and no one will ever shout at you, or even roll their eyes.

Don't even wear your slippers on the tatami.

May be you have not been to Japanese Onsen or Sento�

Anyway, Onsen has small chair to sit on and most people scrub sitting down. Hardly anybody scrub standing up unless you want to show off your Crown Jewel.

Or perhaps someone is simply not able to easily sit on those tiny little stools due to back or knee problems or arthritis. The same is true of the older "Japanese-style" toilets that require squatting low. Both are impossible for someone like me who would simply not be able to get back up again due to knee arthritis. Standing often has little to do with some imaginary voyeuristic desires.

Arthritis is nothing uncommon among Japanese, either. I have seen many people at Onsen or Sento where they directly sit down on a floor and extend feet when washing and not to use those small chairs. I also have seen many people sit on those small chairs and extending leg straight out rather than bending.

A person with arthritis once told me extending feet out like that is more comfortable position than standing up and having entire weight on your feet.

Again, I have seen many elderly Japanese sitting extending feet like that at Onsen or Sento, but I have hardly seen a person standing up.

As another person with bad knees, I am delighted to observe that in recent years, a lot of the Japanese-style toilet stalls have hand rails built into the walls.

Problem I have with those little stools is that I'm put off by sitting on something that was in direct contact with another dude's butt crack and 'crown jewel' only minutes before. I myself grew up with one of those in our ofuro, but I guess it didn't bother me when I was a kid. Anyways, now I rinse off the stool real good with the showerhead, then try to sit as shallowly as possible to minimize the contact between my butt and the stool. To the point where I almost fell off it once or twice.