What Do Men (gay FTers) Find Romantic?
Was cleaning up my inbox this afternoon and come across an articles that I have saved... which instantly reminded me of the thread on finding a FT-friendly BF.
So how do u make a gay FTer feel loved and treasured in a romantic way??? Love to have your inputs and compile a top-10 list... Which might come in handy some day... Maybe, to be handed out as a Maintenance Manual of a FTer before someone signs the contract... :D For your reference here is the article, What Do Men Find Romantic? By Sara Eckel 1. Compliments. The quickest path to a man's heart is through his ego. "The other day, my lady told me she thought I was sexy. That was so cool! I'd never heard that before and it blew me away!" says a schoolteacher from Chicago. A political consultant from Washington, D.C. agrees: "The most romantic thing in the world is for you to be in awe of your man's skills -- whether it's his ability to make people laugh, perform at sports, fix things, or retrieve and display esoteric knowledge. Let him wow you," he says. 2. Dark chocolate. "Milk chocolate is for kids. Dark chocolate is for lovers," says Weinstein, who explains that dark chocolate has a higher percentage of cocoa, which means it has more phenylethylamine, a chemical that mimics the feeling you have when you're in love. 3. Hard-to-find gifts. Is his college sweatshirt so faded you can't decipher the name of his alma mater? Is he mourning the loss of a rare comic book that his mother threw away when he left home? Does he collect antique hood ornaments? Webb says that a gift that requires some effort is sure to be a big hit with your guy. "Men and women tend to express love differently. Women are usually the more nurturing types and tend to think of romance in terms of 'soft touches' while men express love in more practical ways," says Webb. 4. You, in his clothes. "Come to the dinner table wearing nothing but his button-down dress shirt. Now that's romance!" says an artist from Boston. 5. Funny movies. "A lot of people say that shared values or goals are what make a relationship work," says Weinstein. "But to me it's a shared sense of humor. If you like the Marx Brothers and your date doesn't, then it's simply not going to work," he says. "When you can find someone to laugh with, then you know you're really connecting." 6. A great memory. A picture really does paint a thousand words -- especially if it's of the two of you tanned and glowing at a beachside resort. "I went to my girlfriend's office and saw that she had a picture of us on vacation in Cancun," says a Seattle construction worker. "Little things like that just make you feel great." 7. An old-fashioned night on the town. A publisher in New York says that he isn't a huge romantic, but he admits that the rotating dance floor at the Rainbow Room makes him pretty gooey. "You're surrounded by well-dressed couples of all ages who know how to dance. This gives the effect of being in a romantic movie about old New York. Plus, it's a little disorienting with all that spinning around, which puts you in a dreamlike state," he says. 8. Tall buildings. Because in general guys just like big stuff. But also because taking in such a huge view can put life into perspective. "The tremendous view of the city with all its lights is not only awesome in its own right, but accentuates the essential smallness of the individual person," says a Chicago attorney. "Thus humbled, it is most comforting to realize, at that instant, you're not alone in the world." 9. Surprise intimacy. Whether it's an unexpected kiss or an afternoon jaunt to the bedroom, men swoon when women say "Come hither." "We like surprises -- like when you initiate sex at odd times, or rent a room in the middle of the day. We also like beaches, bed-and-breakfasts, and when you squeeze our thigh at a snooty dinner party. Oh, and baths. We like bubble baths," says a writer from New York. 10. P.S. I love you. They may not always admit it, but many men report that they love getting affectionate little notes. "I particularly like finding a note in my suitcase when unpacking on a business trip," says an executive from Dallas. Weinstein agrees. He loves getting a surprise note or email with an affectionate message, and says that a "p.s." increases the charm. "There's something about the p.s. that people respond to. It reminds us of when we were at camp and our mom wrote. P.S. I love you, or the note our high-school sweetheart stuffed into our locker." |
an op-up
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Champagne!
Mr. silverthief2 and I had a bottle last night after he finished his exams and was officially halfway done with law school. :) |
Trips to new cities that have:
a) Luxury accomodation b) Tall buildings c) Great romantic restaurants :D |
Just a masculine, football watching, beer drinking man.........all 3 not found in the gay world........but just the avg joe works for me over the obnoxious gucci queens:D:D:D
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Originally Posted by USFreak
(Post 8899923)
Just a masculine, football watching, beer drinking man.........all 3 not found in the gay world........but just the avg joe works for me over the obnoxious gucci queens:D:D:D
As a matter of fact, whenever I choose to watch ESPN over LOGO, Bravo, HGTV or Food Network, my friends would start questioning my orientation... lol |
Something trivial but i think is really sweet...
Was leaving LAX on a late nite flight to head back to the east coast... While getting close to the airport, I told my friend that he can just drop me off by the curbside so he doesn't have to park his car in the garage... He replied, "nope, I can't do it"... I'm glad he didn't... Or I would be fuming mad!!! LOL... It felt great to get a big hug before heading to the gate... And be able to turn around, see a smiling face and him standing there and waving at u... Walk a few steps more and turn around and get another big hug... :) So as Rule #1, if a FTer says u can drop him off by the curbside, never never do it... :D |
A snuzzle and a snog in the wumpus woom!
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Originally Posted by justforfun
(Post 8896947)
an op-up
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A new piece of Hartmann luggage...
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Coming home from a long day @ work and my then bf not-so-good-cook cooked me the simplest meal (I believe it was spaghetti meal balls) and gave me a back rub.
The memory stays although the relationship later on went sour... |
Originally Posted by SingaPaul
(Post 8900470)
So as Rule #1, if a FTer says u can drop him off by the curbside, never never do it... :D
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Originally Posted by DCAKen
(Post 8909844)
Nothing beats that big hug and a kiss after a long flight.
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Originally Posted by silverthief2
(Post 8897220)
Champagne!
*hic* |
It is ok to do that in public??? As for the retired people...they can deal with it. Old dogs may not be able to learn new trick that require physical agility, but if they try hard enough I'm sure they can learn basic respect for people who are different from them. As for the kids, let me ask you this question: Would you feel uncomfortable kissing a woman in front of kids? If so, then by all mean refrain from kissing your partner in front of them too. If it's not kissing itself you find objectionable, then I'm not sure why you would have a problem doing it in front of kids :confused: |
Originally Posted by USFreak
(Post 8899923)
Just a masculine, football watching, beer drinking man.........all 3 not found in the gay world
Dave |
Just a few weeks after 9/11, my Air Force sergeant boyfriend received very short notice that he was being shipped off to Uzbekistan. It was a crazy time running around buying things for his deployment that had no end date, and taking care of financial and legal matters.
Fortunately, we had email contact for 6 months, but I received a phone call late one night. He asked me if I had enough miles to get over there to hold his hand through the fence surrounding the compound. I later received a bouquet of beautiful sunflowers on Valentines Day that he had ordered online from Afghanistan. So what do I find romantic? Knowing I'm loved even without having to hear it. |
Originally Posted by SingaPaul
(Post 8910590)
It is ok to do that in public??? I usually do the kiss before getting out of the car... There is only one time i did it while out of the car... I felt bad for the retired couples park right behind us at that time... And come to think of it, i wasn't even sure if there were kids in those cars... Maybe it is just me... it just doesn't seem quite right to do that infront of kids or where kids could see...
As for the subject of this thread, just that is very romantic, a goodbye or welcome home kiss before security or in the baggage hall. Getting driven to the airport at 4:30 in the morning, picked up after midnight. |
Originally Posted by SFOTRAVELER
(Post 8910831)
I received a phone call late one night. He asked me if I had enough miles to get over there to hold his hand through the fence surrounding the compound.
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Originally Posted by Derek
(Post 8910921)
I feel very sorry for you.
As for the subject of this thread, just that is very romantic, a goodbye or welcome home kiss before security or in the baggage hall. Getting driven to the airport at 4:30 in the morning, picked up after midnight. Now THAT is romantic! Dave |
Originally Posted by SamOF
(Post 8910635)
Would you feel uncomfortable kissing a woman in front of kids?
Originally Posted by SamOF
(Post 8910635)
If it's not kissing itself you find objectionable, then I'm not sure why you would have a problem doing it in front of kids :confused:
Originally Posted by Derek
(Post 8910921)
I feel very sorry for you.
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Originally Posted by SFOTRAVELER
(Post 8910831)
...I received a phone call late one night. He asked me if I had enough miles to get over there to hold his hand through the fence surrounding the compound...
So what do I find romantic? Knowing I'm loved even without having to hear it. Rule #2, making a FTer feels loved without uttering "i love u"... :D Now, we need more examples on how to do just that... |
I would love to have the general public exercise sensitivity to what i... "choose" would be a bad choice of word... i mean what i adopt as a lifestyle... And in the same gesture, i ask myself to extend the same sensitivity to the general public... and especially the kids... respect runs both way and it can't be demanded... only earned... IMHO... Furthermore, I think that the most real kindness you can give kids is examples of well adjusted, happy gay people that the kids see in their everyday lives. In fact, I think that applies to more than kids. *That's* how we earn respect. Sorry to hijack the thread :) My boyfriend flips out whenever I'm flying, so I could use the tips. :p |
If I was constantly wondering if children or old people were around before displaying my affection for my partner, I would be spending a lot of time thinking and not nearly enough time acting.
The vast majority of straight couples I know would not hesitate for a simple PDA, especially at the airport, and I am not going to hesitate either. I'm not sure how one is sensitive towards children by not displaying a common act of love with their partner. For fear that someone filled with hate might respond to your action? The logic seems to fail me on this point. |
Originally Posted by DCAKen
(Post 8909844)
What I find even more romantic is when he's waiting for you at the other side of security after you've gotten off the plane.
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Originally Posted by fooko2002
(Post 8912947)
The vast majority of straight couples I know would not hesitate for a simple PDA, especially at the airport, and I am not going to hesitate either.
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Originally Posted by SJC1K
(Post 8913348)
Me neither. It used to take some nerve to do it, but I'll do any PDA with a same-sex partner that I would consider acceptable and tasteful as an opposite-sex PDA. I'm kind of conservative as to opposite-sex PDAs--that comes from growing up Lutheran in the Midwest--so I don't think an extended public session of tonsil hockey is appropriate for any combination of sexes, but I won't hesitate to give a warm hug and quick, chaste kiss at the airport.
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Two big things for me and my BF...
--Cuddling. There is nothing in the universe like flopping on the sectional, his head in my lap, watching Game Show Network or a PPV movie. That's some good times. --Crossword puzzles. For some reason, we've taken to filling out a crossword while waiting for food at the restaurant. He jokes that we're such an "old married couple." I just beam. |
Originally Posted by fooko2002
(Post 8912947)
If I was constantly wondering if children or old people were around before displaying my affection for my partner, I would be spending a lot of time thinking and not nearly enough time acting.
The vast majority of straight couples I know would not hesitate for a simple PDA, especially at the airport, and I am not going to hesitate either. I'm not sure how one is sensitive towards children by not displaying a common act of love with their partner. For fear that someone filled with hate might respond to your action? The logic seems to fail me on this point. Love is to be celebrated between any two people who care about each other, at least in my life and culture. On your deathbed, you will not look at your checking account - you will look at how freely and joyously you loved throughout your entire life. Getting back on topic - I find unexpected small gestures to be romantic. |
Originally Posted by DenverBrian
(Post 8914026)
--Crossword puzzles. |
Originally Posted by ebayj
(Post 8914518)
Be the change you want to see in this world. The younger gay generation truly fills me with hope - but fooko already knows that about me. And he is one of the sweetest young adults you could ever hope to meet.
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Originally Posted by fooko2002
(Post 8914857)
Yes! Logic Puzzles too!
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Originally Posted by SamOF
(Post 8912727)
I understand that sentiment...but honestly I think being sensitive to homophobia just makes those who aren't comfortable with the "lifestyle choice" think that they're right--- that you're doing something sinful and should be ashamed.
Furthermore, I think that the most real kindness you can give kids is examples of well adjusted, happy gay people that the kids see in their everyday lives. In fact, I think that applies to more than kids. *That's* how we earn respect. |
Originally Posted by fooko2002
(Post 8914862)
Aww...thanks ebayj! I hope our paths cross again in 2008!
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Originally Posted by SingaPaul
(Post 8910590)
It is ok to do that in public??? I usually do the kiss before getting out of the car... There is only one time i did it while out of the car... I felt bad for the retired couples park right behind us at that time... And come to think of it, i wasn't even sure if there were kids in those cars... Maybe it is just me... it just doesn't seem quite right to do that infront of kids or where kids could see...
|
Originally Posted by USFreak
(Post 8899923)
Just a masculine, football watching, beer drinking man.........all 3 not found in the gay world........but just the avg joe works for me over the obnoxious gucci queens:D:D:D
Trip to Paris for me is always romantic, Ive done this so many times, but would still find it most romantic with the right guy. Also, I have bought a ticket just to go through security to meet someone, on several occasions, I do too think its romantic. Oh, and to give my 2 cents worth... I do find PDA to be a bit much for me (let it be straight or gay), maybe its just my upbringing, but I don't like to do it and when a guy tries to kiss yours truly in public, I always get rather shy about it. |
hey - just someone to be there would do me... :)
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My BF and I have never shied away from a goodbye kiss (or a hello kiss either) at the airport. Because we live in different cities, our visits often begin or end at the airport. He usually walks me to the start of the security line, and we say our goodbye there, and it doesn't bother us if someone sees us and doesn't approve. That's their problem, not ours. It's not like our goodbye kiss is anything pornographic either; we'll save the heavy stuff for home, because that's just our style.
When he flies to Houston to see me, I always find a way through security to greet him at the gate, and on his way out of town, I go through security again and wait for the flight with him, and we say our goodbye at the gate during the boarding process. |
I just recalled one occurrence… My friend was picking me up from campus one day… And when I opened the door to the truck, I saw 3 red roses on the seat… a small teddy bear was strapped to the stems and it was wearing my favorite 24 nascar overall… Silly me, I didn’t know the significance of 3 roses at that time… and that whole trip, I was happily playing with the teddy bear with my right hand… and my left hand, was holding his right… :)
Originally Posted by nomad1974
(Post 8921357)
Originally Posted by SingaPaul
(Post 8910590)
It is ok to do that in public???
1) At airports that I've been to, I hardly saw any kissing between same sex couples… So I wasn’t sure… 2) There have been articles, which might have been discussed here, about gay couple told to cover up their act in the plane by cabin crew, or one about a gay couple told to leave the cabin because they were acting intimately or something like that… And that confused me further… :confused:
Originally Posted by asnovici
(Post 8924407)
this Euro transplant still had not found any interest in American football
1. Wade Phillips (cowboys)… His quarterback gave him a big high-five one Sunday and he was shaking his hand in pain after that… The following Sunday, the quarterback did a soft smack on his palm… U should have seen his reaction… Like a little boy who just got a smooch from his childhood sweetheart… That grin was so darn cute… ;) 2. Brian Billick (ravens)… He was throwing kisses to a player from the team his is playing against… That was such a refreshing sight… I tried to catch a few of those kisses… But Ray Lewis smacked them down before they get a chance to travel 10 yards… :( 3. Andy Reid (eagles)… He once made a bet with TO that if he were to catch 15 TDs, he would wear a spandex pants… Now, that would be quite a sight too… And that was the only season I was rooting for TO… 4. Mike Holmgren (seahawks)… He looks just like an identical twin to Andy Reid, doesn’t he??? |
Originally Posted by SingaPaul
(Post 8926979)
U can place guys u fantasize of in your league… I think that is how it works… :p
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