A Modest Proposal
 

I propose that Delta institute a fee, say $20, to allow Coach pax to use a lavatory in First.

Oh boy. Pass the popcorn, this is going to be good.

And divide the money collected among the passengers in First:D

I don't think a FC lav pass is needed. I have been on many DL flights where Y pax use the F class lav and nothing is ever said.

Charge the FA's $10 and the pax $10 since the FA's so willingly and knowingly allow such use.

Precisely. Telling pax not to do something, especially where the only risk is being stopped and told again, doesn't work. Telling them they're welcome to if they pay $20 will have at least some of them not wanting to risk having to pay.

"Anyone have a fiddle? Make someone from coach fiddle for me."

http://www.vagabondish.com/hilarious...e-stuff-video/

I don't think this goes far enough. I propose that Delta rearrange the cabin en route on every flight. It's obviously correct that FC pax get to board first and make all the coach pax slink past them to reach their cattle pen. It's equally obvious that the FC pax are properly lifted airborne at the front of the plane earlier than the folks in back.

What needs to happen is to have the FC cabin relocated to the back of the plane midflight to ensure that the premium pax also have the privilege of reaching the ground before coach. Additionally, this would reinforce the fact that coach pax are inferior by making them wait as the FC pax walk through the now-forward coach cabin to leave the plane first.

As a final touch, pax would find that the seats have been rearranged, but the overheads have not. FC pax can leisurely stroll to the front of the plane where their carry-on bags are waiting, while most coach pax will find that they must force their way down the aisle contra-flow to reach their carry-ons several rows behind them.

Maybe DL could add access to the F lav to the Have One on Us coupon for medallions who don't get upgrades.:D

The fee goes up to $40 to the coach passengers that crop dust the F cabin while queuing in the aisle.

DUMB IDEA

I've sat in FC my share of times, and have no problem with someone coming from the front part of coach to use the FC lav's when they're not being used and the carts are out in coach.

The OP should think about this situation the next time he/she isn't upgraded.

Bob H

$100 for a BizElite/International flight, since that seems to be the only time the no-cabin-crossing policy is strictly enforced. Just mount one of those handy credit card scanners to the curtain.

(in before the lock :D)

You may want to switch your sarcasm detector to [ON] the next time that you log into FlyerTalk. :rolleyes: ;)

Maybe they can put premium tp in F also, and charge 10c per sheet!

And here I thought the thread title telegraphed the OP's tone.

Seriously, though, I do wish that FAs would more consistently deploy the curtain between F and Y to discourage aft passengers from venturing forward.

But of course, there has to be handouts. If DL agrees with your idea, I would think they would propose the following:

Diamond = Free
Platinum = $5
Gold = $10
FO = $15

And just to irritate FO's a little more, DL AmEx cardholders pay only $13. :D

Does someone have a little extra popcorn for me? I ran out.:D

Better idea, all economy passengers have to pay $5 to the DMs on the flight for the privilege of sharing a plane with them.

+$10 if you require a guide to find the Lav in FC. $5 more if under 12 and unattended....

In before the lock....

Hmmm....virtually every domestic flight I have been on in F (in recent memory) has seen Y pax use the FC lav. Sure the FA may make an announcement requesting you use the lav in your cabin, but it is roundly ignored. Only on a recent flight from Mexico to ATL did the FA announce it was a law that pax only use the lavs in their cabin.

BTW, please pass the popcorn!

A couple of weeks ago I flew on an E75: 12 seats in J, 64 in Y, one lav up front, one at the very back of the AC. In his announcements the FA said that passengers in both cabins should us both lavs. It made a lot of sense on that plane; I didn't feel proprietary about the F lav with those ratios.

There's a $14 popcorn fee, but you save 99% if you use your Amex.

Ah. Will I get priority access to the salt shaker?

We're talking about domestic first... Your three grains of salt will come in a cheapo paper pouch. No shakers for you.

Save at least one of those grains to take while reading certain flyertalk posts.

Yeah you've got to pay for BizElite to get the Widget Shaped salt/pepper shaker. Is that even still around in BE? Loved it!

surprised nobody has asked this yet, but here goes ...

$20 per visit? or $20 per flight?

:rolleyes:

Although I imagine as a loyal AmEx customer, I'll receive real butter, while the FOs get an Economy-class pack of "Buttery Spread".

A $300-a-month unlimited pass will also be available.

Mmmmm, I think the lavs should be for DM's only, everyone else should just hold, even transcons. Intl routes we could cut people a little slack and restrict to just one visit. :D

This thread is going to be good. Gonna bookmark it...

Can also use miles... 40,000 for the month pass. With an initiation fee, of course, if you're a new member.

Only if you're Platinum (assuming that this is still free for DM). Much like Sky Club membership, this will cost 70,000 miles for kettles. Fortunately miles can be purchased for only 3.5 cents each!

Instead of "have one on us" coupons, delta will give out "have one trip to the toilet on us" coupons when OLCI.

How many miles would one earn?

Imagine a Toilet Run! :cool:

Or similiar to checked bag fees (sans size and weight restrictions):

first visit $20.00
second visit $30.00
third visit $40.00

and so on...

Never thought that this one could be a problem on a US carrier, isn't "illegal" to walk to other cabin for them?

There'd be major issues given it'd take DL IT 3 months to figure it out how to print out correctly. In the meantime what would pax do?

Imagine the reaction from the pax in Y on those CR7s that only have a lav in the back... The poor folks in F running that gauntlet might be hanged. Or worse!

And if they have no bread, let them eat cake. :)

Don't forget the promo, which makes this a steal at roughly 47,000 miles purchased.