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Your worst (human) seat companion stories, please

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Your worst (human) seat companion stories, please

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Old Jul 5, 2018, 3:31 am
  #1  
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Your worst (human) seat companion stories, please

I'm recently off CPT-JNB on BA/Comair, having sat next to someone who was eating from a massive paper bag of biltong sprinkle*. When he wasn't feverishly snacking from it, he'd scrunch down the top of the bag so that it it would bulge in a dangerous fashion. Needless to say, his bag broke (exploded) about an hour into the flight. I, my G&T, my laptop, and my food were thoroughly biltonged. In fact, I can see biltong shavings in my laptop as I type this.

Inspired by this thread, I'm hoping there might be some other BA-related seat companion horror stories out there with which I can get over this morning's meaty occurrence.

Take it away!

*For those unfamiliar with southern African cuisine, biltong is a dried, cured, meat snack, which - in this instance - looks like this:

It's all gone a bit biltong...
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 3:42 am
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I spent an overnight TATL flight in Y next to a large lady who filled her seat and the armrest space. I thought that was bad enough until she got her knitting out. I had the rhythmic nudging of a compulsive knitter ALL NIGHT.

And rather weirdly she was knitting shopping bags out of plastic yarn. It may have been shredded carrier bags but I didn't care to enquire.
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 3:44 am
  #3  
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Originally Posted by windowontheAside
I spent an overnight TATL flight in Y next to a large lady who filled her seat and the armrest space. I thought that was bad enough until she got her knitting out. I had the rhythmic nudging of a compulsive knitter ALL NIGHT.

And rather weirdly she was knitting shopping bags out of plastic yarn. It may have been shredded carrier bags but I didn't care to enquire.
I dare say some on here wouldn't mind a night of rhythmic nudging...
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 3:47 am
  #4  
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As long as no "shaming" photos are uploaded I think this is going to be a great thread
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:03 am
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Originally Posted by windowontheAside
I spent an overnight TATL flight in Y next to a large lady who filled her seat and the armrest space. I thought that was bad enough until she got her knitting out. I had the rhythmic nudging of a compulsive knitter ALL NIGHT.

And rather weirdly she was knitting shopping bags out of plastic yarn. It may have been shredded carrier bags but I didn't care to enquire.
I'm a knitter, and it is great for passing the time on long plane trips, but I take great pains not to nudge anyone as that is just rude. But then I also take great pains not to fly Y where I'm in danger of nudging anyone.

Yes, most likely it was shredded carrier bags - you make it yourself out of old ones. It is often referred to as "plarn" for "plastic yarn" which I suppose is no worse torture of the English language than "flounge" on here. I must say it isn't something I've personally seen the point of doing but each knitter to her own...
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:04 am
  #6  
 
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I had a bit of an odd one recently in CE. I was in the window seat and the guy in the aisle was SO nice that it became a bit much in the end.

For example, whenever he got up, he asked if I wanted him to bring my bag down from the overhead bin. He put his headphones in and then asked me a minute later to tell him if there was any noise leakage etc. He went to the galley to get something and asked me if I wanted him to ask for something for me.

It was lovely, but quite disconcerting !
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:14 am
  #7  
 
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Sad that being gentlemanly or chivalrous or just plain kind has become so un-hip that it features on this thread!
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:21 am
  #8  
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A month ago or so, flying solo, having just got to my seat upstairs in CW/64K on a 747, a family of two adults and an infant take up 64A/B.

Ms 64J arrives, gets settled, peers across the aisle, then leans across to me and says very loudly "Well, you don't see that up here very often!"

The first and last thing I said to her on that trip was that I frequently fly with my then-six-month old "up here". The moment when I could permanently raise the divider couldn't come soon enough.
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:23 am
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I once had 2 Kg of swiss chocolate fall onto my head due to a badly packed overhead locker.
The lady was most apologetic and ended up offering me a lift into town when we arrived.
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:28 am
  #10  
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Originally Posted by Woodbinerich
I once had 2 Kg of swiss chocolate fall onto my head due to a badly packed overhead locker.
The lady was most apologetic and ended up offering me a lift into town when we arrived.
Haha, years ago we hit bad turbulence, and upon arrival the guy next to me - who turned out to be a numismatist - opened the overhead, only to brain me in my seat with what seemed like hundreds of very heavy coins. I felt bad for him, as the last I saw of him he was crawling around the floor. No free lift to town for me!
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:38 am
  #11  
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I have to admit that a few weeks ago I was the bad seat companion. Woke up not feeling well and took some meds, a long delay meant drinking more alcohol than usual but not enough food, and then motion sickness kicked in. Thankfully I had something to change into but to those around me I sincerely apologize.
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:39 am
  #12  
 
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Originally Posted by newyorklondon
Haha, years ago we hit bad turbulence, and upon arrival the guy next to me - who turned out to be a numismatist - opened the overhead, only to brain me in my seat with what seemed like hundreds of very heavy coins. I felt bad for him, as the last I saw of him he was crawling around the floor. No free lift to town for me!
A good story to cash in on!
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:41 am
  #13  
 
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I guess everyone's had the big overhanging guy in Y, the full recline wonkers (the one I fear the most in that regard is the diminutive Asian woman, seatbelt light goes off, recline to maximum), the seatback kickers, the lean back open mouth fat necked businessman snorers, the DYKWIA blaggers, the lairy boozy colleague party next to your seat, etc.

But worst one I ever had was an extremely nervous flier in a middle seat next to me. Moaning, hyperventilating and eventually repeating "oh no.. oh heavens... oh god... no no...sweet jesus no" during takeoff and a fair way into the flight, and then going into the brace position when the ten minutes to landing sign came on, whimpering and praying. I did chat to her during the flight and explained some of the bumps and hydraulic noises, but it was to a face that expressed nothing better than abject terror. I felt sorry for her, but it does get a bit wearing after a while.
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 4:54 am
  #14  
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
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I had the misfortune of sitting in a middle seat on the way back from FRA recently on a LCC. The man to the right of me spent half the flight complaining that that particular airline were always late and the man to the left of me had a weird thing where he spent the last 30 mins of an hour long flight pushing down on his, um, parts.. im a pretty small woman and all i could do was stare at him in disgust and horror.

Last edited by MiraculousM; Jul 5, 2018 at 4:56 am Reason: there is no class on LCC haha
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Old Jul 5, 2018, 5:00 am
  #15  
 
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On my second to last return to AUH I had a well tanked MAGA evangelist from South Carolina next to me in WP+. I'm not sure to what extent he knew he was flying into the Middle East.

That's all I'm going to say..
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