UA 2 HNL ORD 1619 0520 777 3J Ch9 Y Empower Y

A loony agent, who gave me molto grief when I gave him my
PNR; he looked at me as if I had two heads, and said, well,
just type it in - quite oblivious to the fact that I'd
clearly done so, and the machine had been unable to print
my boarding pass (I could see being relegated to 99Z from
1A because of an uncooperative Mr. Easy Chicken and a surly
Mr. Human Chicken, and I shuddered). With a considerable
lack of aloha spirit (almost matching that of the transit
workers) and muttering under his breath, the guy eventually
came up with 3J, on the wrong side of the plane but quite
acceptable. I thanked him and cut off the interchange as
fast as possible. While I was getting my stuff together I
heard the guy telling the next customer that his upgrade
hadn't cleared, but for the same 15000 miles he could keep
his ORD-MIA upgrade, which had gone through. Not sure that a
1200-mi flight on an RJ is worth those miles, but I walked
off before hearing the outcome.

Security was fast and friendly.

From the RCC, one of the nicer ones in the system, I saw
four F22s taking off, twenty seconds apart, an amazing
sight. Rested a while, sampling various kinds of fruit
punch, and soon it was time to head downstairs.

Boarding was pretty chaotic, with plenty of people pulled
out of the red line to wait in the front of the regular
line - that nonupgraded passenger being one of them.

Predeparture Champers, water, OJ. As before, the HJ side
got more refills than the AB side.

Sat next to a very pretty Japanese woman who was doing
contract research for a drug company - she was ending up
in Indianapolis. I commiserated with her, and then we
talked mostly about music and personal relationships.
Then drinks (she had half a glass of red wine, purely for
the health benefits, she said) and dinner and a nap.

Off menu appetizer: zucchini and bell pepper skewer with
some kind of mayo.

to begin
Fresh seasonal greens; Trader Vic's Javanese or ranch
dressing

This salad, I found to my dismay, was composed mostly of
quite fresh crisp nappa cabbage. After all the cabbage I'd
been eating, I anticipated generating enough gas to power
the plane all the way back to Chicago. (It turned out not to
be quite that bad, and had they relied on my methane, they
might have had to land maybe in Seattle.)

main course
TRADER VIC'S pan-seared beef tenderloin with mango chili
sauce; three mushroom rice cake, red onion, bell peppers
and bok choy

The beef was hardly seared - it looked if anything boiled,
but at least the middle was pink. The sauce, as you may
imagine, was nasty, very sweet, very salty. The veggies
were quite salty as well. The best thing on the tray was
the rice cake, a good-textured umami-filled extravagance.

TRADER VIC'S pan-seared mahi mahi with orange beurre blanc;
wasabi mashed potatoes, sauteed spinach and hearts of palm

My seatmate had about two bites of each component of this
offering and returned it, explaining to the rather concerned
FA that she didn't usually eat much.

dessert
Your flight attendant will inform you of the selection -
this was chocolate sundaes with whipped cream, no nuts;
I passed.

We invite you to begin your meal with a Trader Vic's
signature Mai Tai

I passed again.

Also off menu: breakfast fruit plate served shortly before
landing, which disappointingly had normal fruit - grapes,
melon, kiwi, not bad actually. A quite nice croissant.

The FAs were matronly in a good way. Worked the cabin for
as much of the flight as I was awake. Plenty of drinks.
Smiles, even. I overheard one of them coaching a bewildered
older couple who apparently had passport expiry problems -
she was both patient and detailed and took lots of time.
Amazing service, and something one would expect of a (good)
matron rather than from a hot young thing. I gave her a GTEM.

UA 518 ORD BOS 0805 1121 319 2A Ch9 N Empower N

I asked the FA if she'd ask for Channel 9, and she said,
of course ... but then came back with a frown, saying that
the captain had no intention of ever putting it on, or
something like that.

No breakfast choice: it was "scrambled eggs and sausage"
or nothing. What came: the hockey puck frittata, which
didn't taste like eggs or salsa or anything but rather did
a reasonable facsimile of the taste of water; a hard tough
but not unpalatable piece of Canadian bacon; a Soylent
sausage (mystery meat, I don't think pork); underdone soggy
flat tater tot patties. Your standard fruit appetizer -
crunchy tasteless melon, good grapes, a good strawberry. The
croissant was greasy and tough.

Service was fine, though the prim, not unattractive FA
(in her 40s) questioned me about whether I'd soon be
driving when I asked for a second refill of the not so
stellar De Bortoli Chardonnay. After my answer, she
was quite happy with filling my glass ad lib.

Took the T to the Association, where I relaxed and prepared
for my next assignment, listening to a bunch of high school
kids (extremely talented, but still high school kids) to
determine which would get one of our scholarships. Beer
helped.

P.S. I recommend you look out for the Ungerleider twins:
very talented indeed, and the cellist, who will be competing
in a less crowded market, may go far.