I kept my mouth shut and laughed until I read this, now I have to respond.
LIST
25%+ if you gave me free stuff (shouldn't tip at all since you stole from your boss and if you are that dishonest, what did you do to my food)
15-20%+ if you gave me expemplary service
10%+ if you kept my drink full and were nice (at minimum that is your job)
$0.01 if you don't know what you're doing but eventually I get served.
-0- if you are rude and a talk with your manager.

If you don't like your job, get another one. If you don't think you are paid enough, look somewhere else. If you reward a dog for biting you, it will bite you again. NEVER REWARD SERVICE THAT IS LESS THAN EXCELLENT! Never tip when it is automatic and on top of that consider not going back.

I bring in a party of six and the bill is $300.00. You think you should get $60.00 to $100.00 for that service. That is $60.00 to $100.00 per hour or more if we were your ONLY table. But we are not, so how much do you think your service is worth? At this rate how long before you go out and spend $50.00 for a meal and the server thinks you should pay $50.00 as a tip. Don't think it is a joke, we keep on raising the bar and there is no end in sight.

There is an end though, people stop going out because they can no longer afford the tip. Then the businesses lay off servers and then the businesses close. Guess what server gets $-0- of $-0-. At some point customers may decide it is not worth it.