And if that person deserves an extra couple of bucks I probably would give it to them.
I just do not want to be told something is standard practice-and therefore the accepted norm-when it is not.

"It seems strange to punish the server for the restaurants' policies."
But why should the public be expected to take such punishment because your boss is too greedy to pay his staff a living wage?

"I can't help WHERE my income comes from"
Of course you can.You are not chained to a particular restaurant-nor even this profession.

"It's amazing how $1 or $2 bucks will be able to cheer someone up instead of making them mad. ($4 tip on $30 = disappointing, $6 tip on $30 = rewarding). Most of the time it's not even the money itself but just the principle of the matter."
Sorry-guilt tripping the public is not going to work,
And the tip on a $30(pre tax of course)for standard service would be $4.50-a waitperson unhappy with this could use the extra fifty cents to buy a paper,cruise the help wanted ads and find a different job.So glad I can make a difference in such a persons life.^