Hehe, this is probably my most complicated position on anything related to United.

In general, if it's an empty flight I'll take an Economy Plus seat since the middle may be open, which I prefer if that's the case. If it's full I'll usually take the exit row. On redeyes, though, I prefer a non-exit row, but only if it's something like row six on the A320 because I like to lean against a window and don't want to be "locked in." On shorter flights I just want to be last on first off, so I would take an Economy Plus seat close to the front.

Of course the real solution to this is easy. Don't fly coach.