I have to fly to Denver today,
United is the carrier that flies that way.
If I fly them now it is triple miles,
And that translates into extra smiles.

When I get to the airport, I check my flight.
It is listed as "Delayed", there is no crew in sight.

Finally a crew is found, scheduling is tight,
Their in bound flight was ATC delayed
Not getting my bonus miles gave me a fright
The passengers' nerves are certainly frayed.

Already late we board the plane via the jetway,
If your connection is short, it is so traumatic.
Let's get the aluminum tube on the runway
Ah, flying they say is so romantic.

"Step out of the aisle" orders the flight attendant.
"Overhead bins are shared space."
"We are here for your safety, don't be so dependant."
"You are the enemy here, get out of my face."

I take my seat in Ecomony Plus
At least it beats riding the bus.

We park at Denver in Councourse B
All the way down at gate fifty three.
You got to love a major hub,
Where in the world is the Red Carpet Club?

Visions of more triple miles dance in my head.
But I all want is to sleep in my bed.


[This message has been edited by Comicwoman (edited 08-27-2000).]