Alaska SFO/SEA/EWR/SEA/SFO

Oy vey, you say, here comes another kvetchfest from Eastbay1K from his most recent travels on Alaska Airlines. At least this one won’t be quite as kvetchy!

I arrived at SFO quite early, as there was absolutely no traffic on a Friday morning. Security took all of a few minutes, save the idiot family in front of me. I don’t know how many various liquids were in their various carry-ons, but there were several, and most weren’t baby food. Dad looked like deer in the headlights, and mom looked like “oh we forgot.” And then it was off to the Board Room, where Joanne was there to greet me and have a short chat. I had almost 2 hours in the room due to the unexpectedly quick trip to the airport, whereupon a bagel, some coffee, and finally, a mimosa entertained me. The wireless signal is spotty in certain parts of the room. Finally, embarkation time. Onboard, I ordered a mimosa with a Grand Marnier float. The FA looked at me and I told her that another FA recently suggested such a drink and that it greatly improved the Cuvee Screw Cappa sparkling charmat wine and the Boxed Cardboard Farms OJ. A few people around me said “that sounds good” and therefore, the FA made several of these. Along with the 3 course meal (there were cashews, almonds, and walnuts), the flight was fine, and on time.

The SEA Board Room was exciting as usual, with beverages and snacks. The chicken and rice soup was very good. I had 2 cups, as I knew that Chef Boy-Ar-Dee was probably putting the finishing touches on my SEA/EWR First Class Meal. And finally, came the time for my next first class experience on Alaska Airlines, the proud bird with a lei on its tail.

Upon boarding, I could see that the crew was going to be a good one. Of course, sometimes my crystal ball of such things is really made of shattered glass, but this time, I was correct. The only negative point of the service is that they are so programmed to get the digeplayer service out that it is often up to an hour prior to the first beverage being served. I find this unacceptable especially in light of the fact that there is no real pre-departure service. Otherwise, service on this flight was great. And then it struck me – not only did I recognize the F FA, but I asked her “Aren’t you the FA that makes the mimosas with Grand Marnier?” She said “YES” and I told her what she started, and how we all had them on my earlier flight today. But you are now saying “What about the food service?” Well, here goes. The first course – an uninspired salad with a really gummy sesame dressing, and a slice of bread. As you probably know, this is the only bread you see on the flight. The pat of butter is so small, it is about ½ the size of a normal pat. Then came my main course. Dried Alaskan Salmon with a spicy-ish sauce, and some rice and vegetables. You know, I thought it was going to be Chef Boy-Ar-Dee making my dinner, when instead it was Chicken of the Sea and Uncle Ben. It was a yum festival of a degree I can’t quite describe. But it did look better than the “boneless beef rib” gloop. This was followed by an ice cream sundae, and then a relatively on-time landing.

The Newark Airport Hilton. It is a hotel, with rooms and beds and an airport shuttle service. It was fine. I was in the bed approximately 6 hours before shower time. I have no idea how the breakfast is because I didn’t have the opportunity to redeem the breakfast coupon. I did get to see how the water pressure was at 5:30 am. It could have been a bit better.

EWR. I can imagine that in Nineteen Sixty-Something, this was quite the showplace of international travel. But you can also imagine that if you baked a cake back then, and left it out in the rain for 40 years without new frosting, it wouldn’t be so fresh or functional anymore. The security line was almost non-existent, and I was off to the UA Red Carpet room, as there is no lounge for AS passengers. The RCC had a buffet of the little minibagels individually wrapped in plastic. These things are awful, but at least there is a toaster to slightly improve them, with a wooden tongs to get them out of the toaster (as they don’t pop out high enough). The coffee was hot. Finally, boarding time.

The flight from EWR to SEA was just ok. While the F FA was very good, her “back up” was marginal, and while she didn’t do anything particularly wrong, I found one of them particularly should retire (not a function of age). For breakfast, I had the Krusty Keesh. Nothing like a greasy egg pie to start the day, but almost every opportunity not to have another airline omelet is good. The “starter” fruit plate was pineapple and strawberry (allergic to both) with a pastry that was not as greasy as others I’ve had in the past. Digeplayer content was new both ways, and so I watched a few new movies on this trip (well, new for me). The best part about this flight was the early arrival by an hour.

Back to SEA, and the Bored Room. Particularly offending me on this visit was the couple with the “cute dog” out of the carrier, and they were giving it water out of the human drinking glass. After a few glares that could kill, they put little shishifoofoo back in the carrier, and then doggydaddy brushed his clothing free of dogfur so that all could breathe. I packed my stuff and went upstairs, far away from these people. The soup hadn’t come out by the time of my SFO boarding. The SEA/SFO flight was uneventful. A glass and a half of vino, and the fruit and cheese plate and voila, HOME. Due to the Bay Bridge closure, a one hour BART ride followed by a 20 minute walk, and I was home, less worse for the wear than on other recent trips. And like sands through the hourglass, I’m halfway to MVP Gold for 2008.