My true life example:

My live-in GF (of 4 years) and I travel a lot. I have status and she doesn't. When I get tickets I always book us in the same class with adjacent seats. I book us plenty of time in advance and we check in together so there is no mistake we are traveling as a couple despite having different surnames. There has only been one time that I was offered an upgrade and she wasn't. She would in no way sit in a different section than me by choice nor would I. In the case where I was offered an UG and she wasn't, I simply asked the GA to give the upgrade to the one of the men in military uniform waiting to board as a show of our appreciation and kept my coach seat.

Rewind the clock 6 years. My ex-wife did not work, expected to travel with me to any and all of the choice destinations I went to for work but not the non-glamorous locations. Company bought my ticket, I bought hers. She was very high maintenance and appreciated nothing. She would never have even considered thanking me for giving her the UG because I travel up front much more than she got to. Giving her the UG was what she expected to happen. The times that I was offered the UG and she wasn't, I would not only relish the idea of 2 - 4 hours away from her but I would usually hope for an extensive ground hold after leaving the gate Although she was ALWAYS mad that I didn't give her the UG, I never did give it to her and I did not consider myself a jerk.

So, possibly there are factors involved in the decision that are invisible to us as outsiders. So I will assume that the BF is innocent until proven beyond a doubt that he is guilty of a greater infraction. However, I won't lose sight of the fact that there is a chance that he is just a jerk that was not taught manners growing up.