I too would love the name of the restaurant and would like to offer 3 points as to why the OP should change his mind :

1) To help others avoid the restaurant
2) I think the fear of reprisal upon the server is unwarranted - most likely nobody from the restaurant is going to be reading this.
3) All throughout this thread it seems quite clear to me that the server did all she could in the situation. She is not the one who handled the situation poorly - it was the manager. If there should be a reprisal upon anybody it should be the manager!