Sorry to hear about all your trouble. Bulkhead seating is really hard to come by especially if flights are full and one is not an elite member. KLM service has been good, and they have been really attentive to children on board. Amenities were plentiful ranging from baby packs (diaper, bib, food, and toy) to toddler packs (coloring books, toy etc.). They also preboard them in AMS. We have travelled this route since our baby was just a few weeks old and we had no problems. We also used AA and UAL and you could very seldom get the bulkhead, especially if not an elite member. It is recommended (if at all possible) to obtain a seat for her. We do this and also bring a car seat as well especially on long haul flights. It really helped! Our impression of the available cribs offered by the airlines was that they were not good. Car seats or infant seats were better.