I think of my wife when I embrace my new lover. My wife of 25 years dutifully drives me to the airport, kisses me and waves as I disappear through security. Through the gate and up the stairs I bound with unseemly enthusiasm. My lover awaits!
She's behind the counter of the Qantas Club and she barely glances at my boarding pass. This is it! A round the world flight via Business Class and airline lounges - be still, my beating heart! I'm in love with luxury, or at least comfort.
Like all new lovers, we take it easily at first. I've been here once or twice before with my wife, whose government employer pays for her club membership and her Business Class tickets to exotic destinations. But this is coming out of my pocket and it's a new experience of luxury.
In fact my flights to New Zealand and back in February were the first time I'd been seated ahead of the engines on anything bar a 727/DC-9. This time around pretty much the entire journey will be up towards the pointy end.
Coffee, juice and little munchy things. Mmmmm. The poor sods out in the gate area aren't getting freebies.
I camp by the window and sneak a few photographs. Did you know I'm one of those
planespotter nerds? Well, I am, and I've always got my camera with me. When I was a lad I could pick a Spitfire from a Hurricane in my plastic Airfix squadrons, nowadays I learn to distinguish a B737 from an A380, and I've got photographs of both where I can point out the small details - an Airbus 380 has two rows of windows against the Boeing 737's one.
I pull out my laptop and try to write something, but I'm too nervous. Surely someone will see me here in luxuryland and kick me out. My wife, perhaps.
Flight time arrives and I start to worry that I might miss the plane while I'm swilling champagne or lukewarm coffee. I camp by the door and study the monitors, and in due course my announcement is made.
Business Class on a 737 isn't all that special, really. The seats are bigger and wider and longer and the food and drinks are better (and more frequent). But to my Economy Class eyes, this is it. I've arrived before I've taken off!
I'm on cloud nine as we lift off from a twilight Canberra. They are working on the main runway here and it's a bit shorter than it is normally, so my plane to Perth will stop for refuelling in Adelaide. Just a half hour sitting at a gate, with nobody able to get off, but I'm happy to get another landing and takeoff.