I don't have the statement, but I distinctly remember taking a flight on American in 1992, and an older, wiser friend ensured that I enrolled in AAdvantage. My initial reaction was something like "Why? It's not like I'll ever fly twenty-five thousand miles. That's, like, around the world or something."

Of course, I enrolled and the collection of miles quickly displaced drinking beer, playing craps, and smoking cigars as my strongest addiction.

Pass the Kellogg's breakfast bars, please.