Morrissey, Morrissey, I worry about you. I really do. And all those other folks out there who believe the ol' Funk and Wagnall's Dictionary still applies to our language and Constitution. Since some folks are not quick on the uptake, I'll write these next items VERY SLOWLY...

1) "We suggest you take off your shoes..." = "Or else, you damned lying PAX! And don't hold up OUR line..."

2) "Random" = "You pissed me off."

3) SSI = Hide 'n Seek with your right to due process.

4) SSSS = Public Example Punishment. YOU get to try to figure out why.

5) Pledged Dignity and Respect by TSA = Our estimation of PAX intelligence. If they can make you think there's ANYTHING dignified or respectful about a CP, if you were a dog they could get you to buy a muzzle.

6) "Do you have a PROBLEM with any of this, Sir?" = "I understand legal coercion MUCH better than you do, you damned, ignorant, lying PAX. Comply or I'll do more than VEIL my travel threats."

Glad to help clear things up.