I can't speak to the EWR-OAK flight (yet, although it looks like I might be a regular commuter for a few weeks on it soon), but I've done EWR-SJC (and SJC-EWR when it was offered as the redeye) and they have alweays been good for upgrades, and the service is what you'd expect -- printed menus and full dinner choices -- at least in February, that was true on the redeye SJC-EWR as well).

Enjoy!

Steve