I have had many, many articles, reviews, and poetry published by major publishers, as have many other FT'ERS.If you wanted help w/ the publishing world, I and I'm sure many others would have been forthcoming with advice and contacts. it's a great community that way. I personally even tho I am a "nobody" have many contacts I would have been happy to share w/ you rre agents, publishing houses etc.
HOWEVER - you have chosen to go the Enquirer route and that's your choice.
Now that you HAVE a book contract why the need to keep the site full of its schlocky focus?

And no, I will not buy the book. I have never bought a book like this in my life and probably never will. But if it is serialized in the Enquirer I will read it....