I fly them both in first an equal amount or about 60 flights per years on each, now some of this is regional and some is international but most is domestic. My experience is that on any given flight one or the other can be better but if I add up all the flights it is a wash, and yes I have highest status on both

I would say as a general rule aa is far better with boarding, far more likely to have a gate when you land and far more likely to push back on time, the lounges are a push depending on the time and the airport, crews once again each have their far share of lousy crews, food, in the name of health I stopped eating on planes years ago, both have some pretty worn out equipment, I hate the 220 most uncomfortable fc seat out there in my book and that is all dl,

In the end pick the flight that works for your schedule because the experience isn’t better on one vs the other in any consistent way