I have hundreds of nights as well and have never experienced the staff preoccupied on phones either.

The rooms on the other side of the building facing Benjakitti Park have a far nicer view, IMHO, than those facing Terminal 21.

Elite benefits and general benefits are listed in a small piece of paper that was with your keys and there is a full size piece of paper in the room listing general benefits.

Yes, closets are a littler smaller when two are traveling, but in the 12 suites on each floor, there are two closets.

When the last remodel took place, USB-C was not yet a thing.

Breakfast in Rossini is a much smaller affair with fewer offering than downstairs. What I would suggest is that you just walk through the Orchid Cafe to see what they have. When you go to Rossini's, ask for what you want. They will gladly go downstairs to get it for you.

I am more than a little surprised that you prefer the pool at the Conrad, but I haven't stayed there in a decade so perhaps it has changed. The pool at the SGS regularly receives raves for being a tranquil oasis in the middle of the city. To each their own.

Speaker phones? Is it really the job of the hotel staff to teach basic manners? It is a common occurrence throughout Asia. Irritating, but common. That is certainly not limited to the SGS.

Ladies of the evening? You are making assumptions, but you are in Bangkok.