You can use the club passes from your wife's credit card with either direction of the trip. They'll get you in at one airport (subject to crowding constraints). There's no domestic/international distinction on them. If you have Star Alliance Gold status, you would already have access on the SAN-ORD-YYZ trip because it is international.

The drink tickets can likely all be used, but it is FA discretion as to whether to accept them or not. It seems like United is trying to discourage that, based on an internal memo mentioned on FT, but in my experience usually they will take the tickets/chits even if they have past expiry dates.