Your question is somewhat broad in nature; if you provide the number of travellers in your party, general ages, and what kinds of sights/experiences you'd enjoy, more focused answers can be provided.
That being said, the top attractions in Honolulu are pretty-well documented. Of them, the ones that need a bit of pre-planning include Pearl Harbor and Hanauma Bay. Here's the existing thread on Pearl Harbor.
Consolidated "Going to Pearl Harbor -- Questions & Suggestions" thread
As far as "tourist traps" I have very mixed feelings on the tourist-targeted luaus which are basically pagents with buffet-style food and cocktails. While I appreciate the attempts to portray Hawaiian and Polynedian culture and educate vistors, they also are nothig like the luau that we locals hold to celebrate happy events (weddings, milestone birthdays, etc.)
The Aloha Festivals takes place most of this month with a large number of activities towards the end of the month; these are visitor-friendly but also are well-attended by locals.
https://www.alohafestivals.com/events/
I encourage visitors to hear live performances of Hawaiian music; they are often accompanied by the hula that are associated with the songs. That’s a very authentic expression of the culture.