Plain, or Pinot
Two days later, I'm still thinking about it - and this wine story is worthy (IMnshO) of its own thread.
Picture it, Moxy Hotel Oakland. I have a drink coupon for a wine/beer/house cocktail. I sit at the bar, which is tended by the Front Desk Clerk / DJ / Food Reheater / Bartender (yes, those seem to be all the duties of the front desk staff). Anyway, I asked what kind of red wine was available. He said "Pinot ok?" I asked him what other sort of red wine he had. (CA pinot noir is something I'll not order unless I sample it or know it - it usually rates a high dislike in my book.) He shows me another bottle with a bright design on the label - no name / varietal, etc. (probably on the back label) and he said this is "Plain." "We have Plain, and Pinot." I was dying just a little bit inside, thinking this is the kind of stuff you can't make up, and the guy was serious, so there was no sense in any further follow up, except to order the Plain, as I didn't want the Pinot. It was a perfectly ok glass of complimentary red wine. I couldn't bring myself to order "Plain," so I just pointed to that bottle, saying "I'll have that one."
Just like M&Ms. Plain or Pinot. I thought I'd share.