Figure I should come back and update:
I am Avis President's Club.
Rented May 7-8.
Booked a full-size. They had me in a 300 mile Nissan Altima at first. I asked for a convertible but all they had was a 2020 Camaro 40,000 miles. It was disgusting but I still took it...
Alternatively I think they also offered me a 400 mile soft-top Wrangler.