I have always joked that I am Eurotrash. My mom is Danish. My dad is half Norwegian and half French. Maybe a better name would be EuroMutt. A lot of Scandinavian mixed with some French on the side. I grew up with both my Danish grandparents and my French grandmother all living within five miles of our house. Because of that, we spent lots of time with them during our childhood. We learned their traditions, especially the ones involving food. Because of that we are close to our relatives back in Denmark and France.
When I told my brother that I would be visiting him in August, I suggested that we think about a trip to visit our relatives in the Pyrenees Mountains. I hadn’t been back to my grandmother’s village in ten years. And for Paul and Susan it had been 18 years! Google Maps told us it was a 10 hour car ride. We planned our route giving us two nights in Bilbao on the way up and then a night in Burgos on the way back. We warned the relatives of our visit. Quickly the news spread. We had lots of people to see and we all got very excited! So on Monday morning, the three of us set off to the north in the brand new RAV4’s first road trip! Basque Country and France here we come!
We stopped off outside of Leon to have some lunch. We even used the PLUGSHARE app to find a charging station with a restaurant near. It was the first time Paul had used a public station to charge his plug-in hybrid. Why not get an extra 100 km as we ate?
Lunch in Leon
Luckily the restaurant had a menú del dia and we got seated just as it filled up. The servers were slammed but soon we had our drinks and food. The highlight was one of the best dishes that I have eaten since I arrived in Europe, an octopus purée. It was a bowl of garlic mashed potatoes with huge chunks of tender octopus in it. The Spanish approach food very differently than the French. There is often a simplicity without sauces or other flavors to muddle things up. Granted, I was raised on French food and LOVE my sauces. I make a great Bearnaise sauce that I learned from my family. But Spanish food hardly ever has a sauce, maybe just some olive oil. This dish was light, flavorful and highlighted the octopus. A €10 menú doesn’t mean you aren’t going to be blown away by amazing food.
Octopus in mashed potatoes
At some point in the afternoon, I was chatting on Whatsapp with a South African friend that works on a Princess cruise ship. We actually met online on one of the gay social networking apps when he was docked in San Francisco. We didn’t end up being able to meet in person but have continued to chat from time to time! He’s been in Northern Europe this summer and I love checking in with him from time to time. I mentioned that we were on our way to France with two days in Bilbao and surprisingly he responded that he was going to be docking in Bilbao at 7:30 am tomorrow morning! We would be able to meet each other in person for the first time!
Gran Hotel Domine across from The Puppy and The Guggenheim
We arrived in Bilbao around 6 pm and pulled into the Gran Hotel Domine located directly across the street from the Frank Gehry Guggenheim museum. Corbin, Terry, and I had stayed there in 2004 also on our way to visit the relatives in France. We had such fond memories of the hotel and its spectacular views of the museum. When Paul, Susan, and I were planning our visit to Bilbao, I didn’t hesitate to book there. After a little internet searching, the cheapest rate was on Priceline for €160 a night including breakfast! Nothing on the hotel’s website even got close to that. We could get a room with a museum view for double the price. But I knew that the rooftop bar and restaurant offered us stunning views. I texted Corbin some pictures of the hotel and he identified it immediately.
The hotel had changed a bit since our last visit 17 years ago! The decoration was now simpler. The Lichtenstein in the lobby had been replaced with something less descript. Overall the “art hotel” vibe had been muted into a more basic European business hotel. Nevertheless, nothing could replace the amazing views from the rooftop. Throughout our two days there, we ate breakfast and enjoyed cocktails with amazing views of Bilbao’s famous architectural landmark. I still think this is where anyone should to stay when visiting.
We did a late afternoon stroll past the museum and along the river. Bilbao is such a beautiful city. It was easy to see that it has had more prosperity than the cities in Portugal. Everything in the central area is nicely maintained. The Basque are proud of this city and it shows. It has a heritage that is beautifully demonstrated.
The banks of the Nervión River in Bilbao
As we meandered, I had a goal of ending up at the Cafe Bar Bilbao on the Plaza Mayor. My friend Jorge used to date a Basque guy and they often ate there when he visited. Bilbao has a strong “pintxos” culture that takes the idea of a tapa and delivers it in a beautifully regional way. When we arrived all the tables in the plaza were full so we ventured inside and it was also packed. So we did what any local would do and found a corner of the bar, ordered some cañas and picked out our first round of pintxos. The kitchen is constantly creating different pintxos and then putting them with the others on the bar. Nothing lasts there too long as the crowd quickly digs in. Each pintxo is an individual serving meant to be consumed by a single person. All of them are served on toasted bread slice so no utensils are needed. It’s much bigger than a single bite though so creative attack is key. Our first was a fried egg with spears of tiny chorizos. So simple but AMAZING. The next was seafood croquetas with a fried calamari on top. Also AMAZING. We had just started and we had gotten our socks knocked off.
Cafe Bar Bilbao
Pintxos
Soon enough a table opened up and we quickly sat down and continued our culinary journey into the Basque Country. The next bites were a beautiful fried fish and then duck breast. Four pintxos each in and we were stuffed and the idea of dinner was long gone. Of course we started chatting with the table next to us and the whole experience was beyond what we could have imagined. We strolled home with big smiles on our faces and full stomaches. We also identified a couple of restaurants that we would look into for the following night. We definitely weren’t going to go hungry in this town.
Sunset from Cafe Bar Bilbao on the Plaza Mayor of Bilbao
In the morning, I woke up early with excitement to finally meet Lance in person. They had already docked and were doing all the docking formalities. He said he would be on the first shuttle into the center. I met him outside our hotel and we gave each other a warm embrace. It was incredible that we were finally meeting and in Bilbao of all places. He works in the gift shop and is a very forward facing representative for Princess. He eats with the passengers and even can go on any of the excursions to check on the level of quality. He brought me a gift of some lovely Tommy Hilfiger cologne. SUCH A SWEET GUY.
Great to cross paths with Lance from South Africa at breakfast at the rooftop restaurant of the Gran Hotel Domine
Breakfast at the Gran Hotel Domine is served on the STUNNING rooftop overlooking the Guggenheim museum. Paul and Susan were already there and they seated us adjacent to them. Lance was very impressed with the whole thing. Whenever I book a hotel, I always book for two people. You never know when you’re going to have an overnight guest or run into a guy you met on Scuff a year ago! So inviting him for breakfast didn’t cost me any extra. In addition to the buffet, I ordered Eggs Benedict and he ordered a delicious avo toast with a fried egg on top. Being in this wonderful setting was a magical moment that I won’t forget.
We had booked a free walking tour so I didn’t get a long visit with Lance. Soon enough we were walking over to the Teatro Arriaga for the start of our tour. While there were a number of tours starting there, we didn’t find ours. Unfortunately, due to a mistake on their website, we were in the wrong place. We were supposed to be at the Puppy right next to our hotel! We texted them and we hopped into the cab. The tour was good and offered background on old and new Bilbao. The guide shared that she was up late with her sick daughter so she was a little slow today. I am not sure I needed to know that. But we got a good basic understanding of the city and I am glad we took the time to do the tour.
It ended and we were all hot and a bit tired. Europe’s summer long heat wave was thriving in Bilbao and we were all affected. So once it ended, we ducked into a bar with lots of locals for some cañas. Of course, the pintxos looked amazing so we quickly decided to make them our lunch since we had booked a restaurant for dinner. This time it was Jamón Serrano, seafood salad with smoked salmon and caviar, and a leek and ham salad. All on little toasts. How does anyone ever decide to eat McDonalds in this city??
Let's have some lunch! Pintxos anyone?
A lovely mix of Basque flavors
The Spaniard in me suggested that we return to the hotel for a nice afternoon siesta before more tourism. A quick shower and a nap in the air conditioned room prepared me for the rest of the day.
Next we walked over the river and to the Funicular de Artxanda to take us up high above the city. After a short wait, we boarded only to be stuck for 15 minutes in super stuffy and hot vehicles. There was some issue and we were all cooking like Thanksgiving turkeys. By the time we were moving, we all were sweaty messes. Bilbao is not set up for hot weather.
The view from the top was nice but not spectacular. In the end we decided we should have driven up on our way out of town rather than dealing with the hot funicular. But we stopped for a drink in a tourist cafe at the top and made the best of it. We decided that we wanted to enjoy the sunset views of the Guggenheim from our rooftop so we headed home. Soon we had Negronis in hand, we were playing cards, and enjoying a local cheese platter.
Cocktails and Pupus at our rooftop
Dinner that night was at Bassko serving up some delicious fried starters and then a beautiful white fish with clams, eggs, and asparagus. We also shared a stuffed peppers that was my favorite dish of the night. Our servers were amazing and the whole meal left us wanting to spend more time in Bilbao.
Fish Basque style
Stuffed peppers
We started the next day once again with the amazing rooftop breakfast. I honestly think that the breakfast there is one of my favorite travel experiences. Stunning view, great food. It simply doesn’t get better to start your day.
We finally set off for France around 11 am and in only two hours, we were in Biarritz for some lunch. I have always enjoyed coming to Biarritz as a nearby respite from the family. On our last visit, Terry and I left Corbin with his cousins one night, and his parents enjoyed a romantic seaside night in Biarritz. Of course this included a local gay bar there. We had a nice quiet drink upstairs but could hear a thumping disco on the lower level. So we ventured down to take a look. We were surprised to find an entire room of shirtless men dancing away! Within ten seconds, two adorable twinks bounded over and asked us to put our arms in the air. We complied only to have them immediately lift off our shirts! At 39 years old, I hadn’t danced shirtless in a bar in a long while. And let’s just say the night got crazier from there. Biarritz has a variety of fun memories for me over the years.
Lunch at Cafe Cote de Basque in Biarritz
Eating in Southern France is a joy
At the Cafe Cote de Basque in Biarritz, we ordered a variety of dishes for the table including a local paté, a lovely eggplant, a platter of cheese, and some baby squid. All of this was served with the Atlantic Ocean crashing just steps away. The hardest part of the afternoon was hiking back up to the parking lot from the beach. With the piercing sun, we arrived at the car hot and sweaty. Europe was getting beaten this summer with some global warming heat.
As we set out for the final leg of our journey to our village, I began to feel nostalgic and emotional. Once we left the péage freeway, it all began to look very familiar. Things looked drier than what I was used to. They hadn’t gotten their usual rains. As we approached Oloron Sainte Marie, I suggested that we stop at Artigarrede. Immediately Paul and Susan said that they were just thinking the same thing. In our family we have lots of traditions. One of the best traditions is something called Gateau Russe. While many bakeries across France have tried to copy it, only Artigarrede offers the true Gateau Russe. It is a hazelnut cream in between a spongy layers of goodness. I am not religious but God is somehow involved. Tears literally filled my eyes as we pulled into their parking lot just off the round-a-bout. These tears were not only for the sweet goodness but also thinking of my grandmother, my father, and my uncle with whom we had shared so many of these cakes before. Our stay in southern France would bring up lots of emotions for me during the next few days.
Patisserie Artegarrede - Home of the famous Gateau Russe
Our road into the Pyrenees Mountains
As soon as we hit the foothills of the Pyrenee Mountains, everything turned green like I was used to. The drive from Oloron to Arette is spectacular as you climb into the mountains. Their beauty is stunning.
On this visit, we were staying with one of the Bellegarde brothers, Nicolas, and his wife Miho. They met when they both were chefs for Club Med. He was the French chef and she was the Japanese chef. They live just a jump away from my grandma’s village in Osse-en-Aspe. I hate to admit it but their valley is even more beautiful than the valley that Arette is nestled in. They had moved from Bedous nearby and this new house was a nice upgrade. The views from their patio are simply spectacular both morning and night.
Explore the garden with Miho
We received warm embraces from both. They had recently become empty nesters but had not slowed down at all. Miho took us through their abundant garden proudly showing off its fruits and vegetables. They are both hard workers and take pride that so many things they eat come from their efforts. Like so many of our relatives, almost everything they eat is “de la maison”. It’s understandable that the fois gras is from their geese and all the vegetables for dinner are from the garden. But it’s when they briefly mention that the wild boar was shot yesterday by their son up in the mountains do you begin to grasp the depths of what “de la maison” means. They would simply roll their eyes if they ever heard Ina Garten say “Store-bought is fine.” Ce n’est pas vrai.
Because both are chefs, the food is always amazing at their house. A beautiful starter of tomatoes from the garden in a vinaigrette with artisanal bread baked that morning by Nicholas’s brother Jacques. Then it was a beef stew. Followed by local sheep’s cheese and then the Gateau Russe that we brought. And it’s like this everyday. Life with our family means amazingly fresh food, everything local, and everything especially delicious. It was nice staying with Nicolas and Miho because they both speak wonderful English which really helped Paul and Susan. I was very happy that my French was doing well albeit rusty. In the next few days I would have lots of opportunities to dust it off.
We are home. The Gateau Russe proves it!
In Spain we take the leftover bread from the previous day and spread tomato and olive oil on it for breakfast. In France, you can dip the stale bread into your bowl of chocolate or coffee. Or if you’re lucky, the stale bread turns into French toast. As Nicolas was on summer vacation from his job as head chef at a local school, we enjoyed a wonderful breakfast outside on the patio nestled in the Pyrenees. It was wonderful to catch up with them and hear all about their lives. All of our kids are roughly the same age so they have known each other at various stages. Nicolas and Mijo are now living alone but the three kids seem to pop in from time to time. Their local rugby team was hosting a big festival in the village on the weekend so the eldest and youngest were scheduled to help out.
Weekly farmers’ markets have been held for years through the region. Luckily, Bedous had theirs that morning so we headed over. As soon as we parked we ran into Kathy, the wife of Nicolas’s brother. It had been years since I had had seen her but we were greeted with two kisses and broad smiles. Henri and Kathy were hosting the big luncheon on Sunday to bring together their side of the family in our honor. As we ventured further into the market, we passed amazing local vendors of cheese, meats, fish, veggies… I was in heaven. The highlight was seeing my cousin Jacques who bakes artisanal breads in his wood ovens at their mill. As my uncle Daryl would say, we get to experience “La France Profund”.
Farmers Market day in Bedous
Jacques spotted us and immediately abandoned all his customers to come give us all big hugs. He spent about a year with our extended family in California so he and I are quite close. It had been ten years since we last saw each other and his infant son was now 11 years old and helping him out with the bread. He was an adorable young man with a big smile. He and I bonded instantly. He also had a cute puppy that also made us all coo. Jacques insisted we come by his house at the mill later to have a little drink and chat more.
Cousin Jacques bakes and sells his artisanal breads
A nice variety on sale
Jacques's son Camille stands next to a little sign to show people the way to the bread
We enjoyed a some homemade sausage that Nicolas made for lunch. Unbelievable flavor. And the meat came from the neighbor’s cow. What a great way to live and eat. Our goal is to try to move around a bit between the marathon of meals just to stay ahead of it all!
We're back home in Arette
The farmlands of our family in Arette
The spectacular Pyrenees Mountains
That afternoon we decided to do a stealth visit to our grandmother’s village in the next valley over. We wanted to just drive around and look how things had changed. The lovely thing about the Pyrenees is that they are green year round. This happens due to the summer rains that keep things fresh and watered. We arrived in the center of Arette and walked around a bit. They experienced a big earthquake in 1967 so much of the town including the church all were rebuilt after they were destroyed.
Next our tour continued past the family farm and house that was several hundred years old and had withstood the quake. It proudly displays its age on the keystone above the front door. Next we crossed the river to see the farms of several cousins. As we were in the heat of the day, we didn’t see any of them out working.
When my brother was 11, he spent the whole summer living with my grandmother who was over visiting her cousin and staying on their farm. They had lots of kids and my brother has wonderful memories of his time there. Unfortunately, the eldest son, Jean Luis, was up in the mountains with the brebis, the flock of sheep. They spend weeks at a time high in the mountains with them to get the milk for the local cheese as they graze on the grasses.
Driving around the village brought up so many memories for all of us. It felt different to visit without my family elders. We were now the elders. A feeling of nostalgia set in with melancholic subtones.
We got back in time to go with Nicolas and Mijo for late afternoon drinks at Jacques’s place. A bottle of champagne and other drinks greeted us at a picnic table in front of the house. Being a mill, it is located by a rushing river which makes this setting truly spectacular. It was nice to get to know his son a bit more. Two of his brothers and their families live on the same farm and soon enough we filled the table. The French was flying by this point and I had lost all apprehension of speaking. It was a fun time and we left wanting to hang more.
Afternoon champers at the Bellegarde mill
We started the next day wanting to buy some local, hard sheep’s cheese. So we walked a couple of houses down to a nearby neighbor. He welcomed us into his house and soon we were in the room where he ages the cheeses. The smell was amazing as we entered this little den. Of course, we were offered a taste and it was divine. Paul and Susan decided to buy an entire round of the cheese to bring back to Portugal and share with their friends.
Nicolas and Miho's cheesemaking neighbor
You have to taste the sheep's milk cheese before purchasing
Our big plan for the day was a hike and picnic at the Sanchese Plateau and waterfall. It was a super warm day and the heat wave continued. But armed with lots of water and wide brimmed hats, we made our way up into the plateau enjoying the spectacular mountain views along the way. At times, it reminded me of Yosemite. Finally we reached the waterfall and they laid out an amazing picnic of local delights. After eating, we ventured over to the waterfall and I even managed to submerge myself completely under the thundering water. It was very cold but felt so good on this hot day.
The Sanchese Plateau of the Pyrenees
A picnic lunch up near the waterfall
A cooling plunge at the waterfall
We headed back to Arette for drinks with a cousin Christine and her family. Her parents still live in our family house but like everyone, they are getting older. We have always enjoyed Christine and her wonderful husband Boris. Last time we visited, their two daughters played with Corbin but now they were in their late teens! Our problem when we visit is that we never have enough time! We promised that we would be returning sooner than the ten years since we last visited.
Lots of smiles and laughs at Boris and Christine's
Dinner that night was at the home of another cousin Bernard and his wife Muriel. On past visits, we have really enjoyed our time with them and this evening was the same. In spite of the fact they had both recently gotten home from work, they offered us an amazing meal. Muriel even stopped off to get us a Gateau Russe since she knew we are big fans. The evening was a wonderful mix of French, English, and Spanish. Several times I ended up speaking French or Spanish to my brother in all the confusion. Their 17 year old son popped in at one point and it was great to see the young man he had become. During our last visit, he sat on my lap and we read together. Seeing all these kids all grown up sure reminded me of how much time has passed.
A wonderful evening with Bernard and Muriel starts on their terrace
Desserts including Gateau Russe
Over the past few days with Miho, she had been encouraging us to go paragliding. Paul and Susan’s boys had visited on their own a couple of years ago and she treated them to a ride. Now she was pressuring me to try out this adventure too! During this year of travel, I have opted to reduce risks that could disrupt my journey. When in Spain, I tried hard to avoid getting monkey pox! So far so good. Now in France, I really didn’t want to get hurt paragliding. I have read that the number one accident that can happen with this activity is to break an ankle when landing. My summer in Europe would be hampered if I had to do it on crutches. So I told Miho that I was going to give it a pass. But she was relentless. And with additional peer pressure from Paul and Susan, we started off my birthday morning driving high into the hills for an incredible adventure.
Once we arrived, it all happened quickly. As a novice, I had a professional tandem paragliding partner. He was this extremely handsome guy that put me at ease with his calming gaze and beautiful eyes. That’s how they get you! I climbed into the harness and soon he was straddling me from behind. This was the opening to a porno that I have yet to see. But I’m sure it’s out there. He only spoke French but we communicated well enough for me to understand that we would be taking a couple of steps down the launching pad. And with an un, deux, trois, we were in the air.
Paragliding for my birthday. He even let me steer!
Flying high above my relative's villages
Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be on the ground in just a few moments.
The flight was SPECTACULAR. We were flying, soaring like a bird. From all my rock climbing, I knew that I don’t have any fear of heights. So this was simply amazing. The setting couldn’t have been more picturesque with the familiar villages of my relatives far below. He had given me a GoPro to hold along the way but I forgot totally about it. Instead it was about this glorious moment. He asked if I would like to steer and I said SURE! So soon I was making loops in both directions and truly feeling the power of the paraglider. After that he asked if I wanted to experience some acrobatics! He took over the controls and I totally lost understanding of where the ground was as we flew almost upside down. My inner ear was totally confused but I loved it. Finally we were nearing the ground and he was steering us toward the landing. As part of my “I don’t want to break my ankle” strategy, I kept my legs outstretched as we landed. This meant my French partner was on his own as we touched down. The good news is we landed. But he somehow landed on top of my body in the process. It was all fairly funny and we finally stood up and freed ourselves from our harness. The whole experience was fantastic and I look forward to doing it again somewhere else in the world this year.
As I have told this story to others in my travels, many people know of someone that has died paragliding! Maybe it’s a bit more dangerous than I imagined. But if I have to go, flying like a bird would be a great way to die.
Another cousin Marie Josée invited us for lunch at a tiny restaurant near her parent’s house in the village. In past visits, her mom would make amazing meals for us. But now in her mid-eighties, she struggles with daily life. Her dad is in his nineties but still manages better than her mom. We stopped by for dessert at their house after lunch. There was still a nice gleam in their eyes, but it was a harsh reminder that we don’t live forever. As we sat around the kitchen table, I remembered all the amazing meals we have shared there together. They have a huge garden and meals are planned around its abundances. She is famous for 5 hour meals with course after course of delicious food. Some of my favorite moments in France over the years have occurred in their house. We had brought a fruit tart and then they had a dessert also, so we celebrated my birthday with a song and two desserts. At one point I looked at this pen and ink drawing of the Arette church on their wall. I looked more closely and the artist was my mom! She was a talented artist and it warmed my heart to see one of her works still in Jeanette and Pierre’s kitchen.
A lovely birthday lunch with Marie-Josée and Marie-Ange
My first two birthday "cakes" of the day
My mom's sketch hanging in their kitchen
My heart warmed to see Pierre and Jeanette
At the end of our visit, I managed to get everyone out in front of the house for a group photo. I look at it now with some sadness but still full of love. It can be hard to see the realities of aging.
We next headed back home for a nap and then Miho had baked a fig tart for my birthday! So we had our third dessert of the day! This was quite a challenge for me since I usually don’t eat anything sweet, no sugar, no fruit, nothing! But my father taught me to be a gracious guest and I really appreciated all the kind gestures.
Our evening plans centered around the big festival hosted by the local Bedous rugby team that all of Miho and Nicolas’s kids have been involved with. Their son Pierre was already there to greet us when we arrived. He was selling beers and was happy to sell us some! I had last seen him when he spent a couple of months one summer at my brother’s. He’s a broad smiling guy who has also inherited his parent’s warmth.
Nephew Pierre gets us all drinks at the festival
Nicholas as the entire team of cooks were in full action. We ate baskets of calamari, chorizo, and french fries. All great food to go with beer. Then after a bit, the entire festival paused to sing happy birthday to me as my fourth birthday “cake” of the day arrived at our table. What a fun day it had been.
Henri and the other brothers had organized a big luncheon in our honor to bring together all the families from their branch of our relatives. They set up in the rugby clubhouse and finished up the cooking as we set the tables. Homemade platters of quiches and cured meats arrived just as all the guests walked in. We really enjoyed getting to know all the adult children of our cousins. It’s so wonderful to see everyone grownup. Our meal started with platters of local heirloom tomatoes. Then the main course was lamb stew with couscous. Then a green salad with local cheese course. Then the dessert was a duel serving of both Gateau Basque and also Gateau Russe. Oh how our family knows how much we love the Russe. Our family rarely gets all together like this so we were especially touched that they all went to such efforts. We are so luckily to be so connected to our French roots.
Cathy made platters of quiches
Cathy prepares the unbelievable garden tomatoes
A cousin who now lives in London joined us with her parents
La familia Bellegarde
The chefs finish up our amazing luncheon
Of course the cheese course is a staple in the meal
The Bellegarde Brothers
We got back home and took a much needed nap after an afternoon of eating and drinking French style. I awoke to see several texts from Terry. He wanted to talk.
So I called him and he shared that he wanted us to buy Corbin a car. This surprised me as neither of our parents bought us our first cars. Instead we got jobs, saved up, and purchased cars all without the support of our parents. It was an invaluable lesson and an early milestone in becoming an adult. So he and I argued a bit and then I shared that I was hoping that we didn’t have to have these kinds of conversations this year. If something is burning down, please call. But otherwise, I need a break from all the family drama of his daily life.
I could tell that he didn’t like hearing this. We were still trying to navigate this undefined sabbatical. But this level of connection was disrupting my journey.
He seemed to be upset by this. And then threw out that he insists that our two months of reintegration with each other next summer MUST be in the United States. Ugh. I had previously shared with him that I felt it would be better to pick a neutral place, not in the US and not in Europe, where we can have an easy time reconnecting with each other.
I said that I have no interest in deciding this right now. We didn’t need to worry about it until later. I am planning on popping into California and spending four days with him and Corbin over Xmas. I suggested that this might be the right time to discuss this further. I can’t spend my sabbatical year disputing things that will happen in far off next summer.
So this turned out to be a bad conversation. We hadn’t had many talks since I left but none of them had gone well. I was needing space and he seemed to be inventing things for us to talk about as a reason to communicate.
Paul and Susan had brought some port from Portugal with them and we had a quiet evening of Port Tonics with our hosts and two of their kids. The sun was setting and the views in their beautiful valley were getting more breathtaking with each minute. As it was our last night in France, we all reflected on our wonderful visit back to the homeland. Miho and Nicolas had been amazing hosts for us.
A final sunset in the land our our people
Soon after breakfast the next morning, we were packed. We stopped by my cousin Jacque’s mill to say goodbye and he sent us on our way with some of his delicious bread.
Jacques's kitchen at the mill where all the bread is made
Next we headed high into the Pyrenees Mountains towards Spain. We decided that we would stop off in Pamplona for lunch and then had booked a hotel in Burgos that night. As soon as we got out of the mountains, Spain was drier and hotter than up in France. We parked in the center of Pamplona and walked around as we kept an eye out for a nice restaurant. It was some Catholic holiday so many things were closed. We happened to walk past a monument dedicated to the running of the bulls. It was an energetic moment with people in various stages of interacting with the bulls. It conveyed the drama and excitement of the event in a way that I felt I was right in the middle of it.
The statue for the Running of the Bulls
The quaint streets of Pamplona. Much less less hectic than with the bulls running around.
We chose a menú del día restaurant that was a whopping €16.90. While still a bargain, it was much more that we had been paying previously. For starters, we had a paella, mushroom risotto and a seafood crepe followed by pluma iberico, stuffed peppers, and meatballs. Finally the meal ended with cream puffs, cheese cake, and coffees. We all marveled at how good the meal was, especially compared to the reasonable price. I love Spain!
Our starters for lunch
A great way to end our meal
We checked into our Burgos hotel reserved through Booking.com. That site seems to be the best option in Europe. They have the widest selection of places including hotel rooms and Airbnb-like apartments and houses. The rooms were fine but the A/C didn’t quite keep us cool enough at night. The heat wave was still going strong and following us throughout our travels.
Burgos turned out to be a great city to spend the night in. I had never been but it was a perfect midway stopping point between south France and Braga. We spent the afternoon walking around and exploring. The cathedral in the center is a beautiful focal point and the city seemed to explode from there. All my Spanish friends had said that Burgos had one of Spain’s most beautiful cathedrals and it didn’t disappoint. Being a non-Catholic and even an atheist, large churches are a bit of a conflict for me. When so many people at the time when they were built were dying of hunger, did it make sense to pour so much money, time, and people’s lives into their construction? I can appreciate it as a historical artifact but am still confused by it all.
The famous cathedral of Burgos
After our eating fest in France, I suggested that maybe we just find a nice tapas bar for dinner instead of a multi-course adventure. We strolled into a lovely plaza and ended up at charming cafe where we ate, drank, and played cards for over two hours. We all took turns walking in and looking at the many tapas on display. Paul and I both spotted the seared fois gras and it was amazing. Susan loves her patatas bravas so they were a hit. The nice thing about tapas is that you can take your time continuing to order as you go. We also enjoyed a fried fish and a good tortilla española. Paul thought the tortilla was a little basic and that it needed some peppers or something. But I explained that to me this is the beauty of Spanish cooking: simplicity. Stunning fresh ingredients that when brought together give an amazing result without the need for lots of spices or sauces.
Like a kid in a candy store but instead there are tapas
Our favorite: fois gras tapa
Tapas, beer, and cards. A great evening.
After a fitful night’s sleep in a warm hotel room, I woke to a lovely view from my hotel room. Soon we headed to a churreria that I had found on Google Maps. It turned out to be a great find and the three of us really enjoyed this special treat. Thick Spanish hot chocolate with the lightly sugared churros is so good.
A room with a view of the cathedral
Breakfast of Spanish champions
A few hours later, we were pulling into Paul and Susan’s house back in Braga. The drive home was fairly easy and we all took turns driving. I wasn’t sure how well the three of us would do traveling together for a week. But in the end, it worked out great. We had a wonderful time together and the experience with our family was amazing.
Settling in Europe has so many advantages. I would have easier access to our family both in France and Denmark. Ryanair offers lots of interesting places that are less than two hours away! So much exploring left to do.
The issue is whether Terry wants to live here. I know he struggles with not living near his family. I understand that. But I wonder when I get to be the priority in his life. During COVID it was easy to let him have the time to be away and help out his family. But I have this year to figure out what it is that I need and how we can work this out together. I honestly don’t think the solution is going to be easy. But we don’t really need to decide anything before next August.
Meanwhile, I need to wake up every morning and take advantage of this wonderful opportunity. I am definitely gaining perspective. I am seeing my life in new ways. Having no job and no house feels wonderfully liberating. So many worries are gone from my life. It is such a luxury to be focused on the pursuit of my happiness. And I am definitely happy. I catch myself smiling as I walk down the street. I catch myself whistling and humming more. This is a good sign. It reminds me of myself in my youth, carefree and eager to adventure and explore. But now it even feels better with the confidence and wisdom of my age. It feels more meaningful.
In a couple of days, I will say goodbye to Paul and Susan and head south to visit a friend. Then I get a week on my own in Lisbon. So many wonderful adventures to come.