My groveling today (Monday) was an exercise in the first or second rule of FF (and a bunch of other things): HUCA. And also a reminder that there’s a lot of wisdom in old (corny) expressions*.

Many calls, many holds, many transfers, sometimes in circles, over 2-3 hours. Can’t recall the exact sequence and which were transfers and which were new calls. Called “lending”, told I needed “portfolio - risk review”, transferred, hold x 10 minutes, HUCA, called “new accounts - credit acquisitions” (? recon), excellent rep, said must contact “card escalations” but 30 minute hold, said she could and would call me back later in the day after she spoke with card escalations between her other calls, call ended, HUCA, called card escalations, they said no, I asked if anyone else could do anything maybe “executive team”, hold x 5 minutes, transferred to executive office, rep there said they are the team which handles customer service matters directly for the CEO, case number created and given to me, told 2-3 days to hear more. There were a few other terminal holds and HUCA’s in between, can’t recall every detail.

I was told several times “just reapply”, clearly without consideration of 24 month bonus rules, 5/24, # of hard pulls, etc.

I got the idea that the executive office is the top of the pyramid for these types of issues, with card escalations immediately below. (I’m happy to post their phone numbers if it’s within FT acceptable rules.) I was told several times that the account could not be reopened because 100% of the CL had been transferred and in order to reopen an account there must be some CL on the closed account. Maybe that’s why sometimes we read that for closed accounts the CL doesn’t become available (for a new account) for 30 days. Seems to me like a quote from Animal Farm “All animals closed accounts are equal but some animals closed accounts are more equal than others.”

Amazingly enough, the rep that told me she would call me back, did call back about 6-7 hours after we spoke, I guess sometimes the check really IS in the mail. Hopefully the check from the executive office is also in the mail and I’ll get a call in 2-3 days. I’ll post again with more “lessons learned” if and when I receive that call.

Lessons learned: Don’t close a card account unless you’re certain absolutely totally positively completely beyond-any-doubt (no redundancy at all ). Don’t transfer 100% of CL to another card if and when you do close an account (I was led to believe by 2 or 3 agents that leaving just $500 or $1000 CL on the account when it was closed would have resulted in quick and easy account reopening).

* It’s easier to seek forgiveness than ask permission.
* The check is in the mail.
* “It depends on what the meaning of the word ‘is’ is.”
* Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part. (Or in this case: poor planning on MY part does not constitute an emergency on Chase’s part .)