I’ve never been so conflicted about a resort or stay experience as I have with this property. Parts of my stay were very good, but there are also many parts that were really bad and/or frustrating.

Arrival and check-in: Poor
After finding our names on the guest list at the main gate, our driver was directed to the main lobby. Upon drop off, another person flipped through the list for several minutes trying to find our name, which we ended up helping them with. Upon finding it, he directed us to the front desk, who told us we couldn’t be checked in there as we had separate check-in at the Diamond Club. We were told to go back outside and tell them to take us to the Diamond Club (Diamond Club was printed in red letters on the guest manifest, so this is a training issue).

We got to the Diamond Club, and started the check in process. We had booked a Diamond Club junior suite through the Marriott website and received ZERO RECOGNITION for our status. Knowing the resort was about half booked, we asked about upgraded rooms based our Marriott status. That set off a wave of confusion as nobody knew how to handle an upgrade. We were first asked if we would be willing to change rooms the next day, which we politely declined. Several people were now on phones and scurrying around trying to figure this out. About 10 minutes passed, and my frustration level grew, they told us they could update us to a Presidential 1BR (perfect), but they were now trying to figure out what the additional cost would be. I politely explained that based on status in the Bonvoy program, there shouldn’t be a cost. That led to more phone calls and scurrying.

Someone new appeared and professed to be their Bonvoy champion, and offered to help with any Bonvoy-related questions I might have. While a nice gesture, I was pretty sure I’d end up being the teacher here. He did tell me that the room upgrade would be complimentary and that he would be providing a $50 resort credit, which I thanked him for (but more on this later).

Room - Very Good
We ended up 2 buildings away from the Diamond Club building, with a pretty steep set of steps since the many of the buildings are up on cliffs. The room was actually two hotel rooms that were set up as a suite, so the second room was our living room, mini bar area and had another full bathroom. It also had a nice double balcony with an ocean view. The room had 4 bottles of cheap booze (Red Label, Skyy Vodka, Beefeater Gin and some Tequila) and a bottle of Merlot. In the fridge were 2 Carib and 2 Heineken beers, and sodas/waters. The bathrooms were about a foot too narrow as it only had about 6 inches of space on either side of the toilet. Some genius also decided to mount the towel bar on the front of the vanity right below the sink, which for most average height males is a very precarious place for it — I almost spit my toothpaste all over the mirror a couple of times!

Butlers — Helpful, but necessary?
We had two very good butlers, who worked well as a team. One was on the morning shift and the other on the evening shift, but they were both on duty a couple of hours in the afternoon, which made for good handoffs. They made our restaurant reservations for nights 2-5 all on day 2 at my request, which was appreciated. Given we weren’t going to drink the in-room liquor provided, I asked about swapping out a couple of bottles. We were told they could get us one bottle of something else, so I asked for 10XO rum which I saw in the Diamond Club. Within an hour, they brought us a sealed bottle, along with our luggage which shouldn’t have taken that long.

They use WhatsApp to communicate with you, and they happily tended to the 2 or 3 requests we had during our stay (a second bottle of wine, some passionfruit juice and I forget what else we asked for). We did get a good morning text most days, and whoever was on the afternoon tried to find us outside to check in with us each day, and despite declining the escort to the restaurants, showed up 3 of the 6 nights as well. I honestly don’t think the service provided was necessary, and I probably over-tipped them for the service provided as no guidelines were provided, but that was my personal decision. NEVER did I get the feeling that tips were expected, and I never heard any comments about them working hard, sob stories, etc. that could be subliminal (or overt) tip requests — which would have irritated me.

Service, excluding butlers — friendly, but inexperienced
Everyone we encountered (and I acknowledge every single person I walk past or make eye contact with) was friendly, courteous, and helpful. However, most waitstaff were pretty inexperienced. There were several instances of things forgotten, food brought out in the wrong order or courses served too quickly in the restaurants, etc. but they were genuinely trying, so we just took those in stride. Nothing was really anticipatory, except by the 3rd day the person in the coffee bar knew our routine (first round of coffee to stay, followed by one to go) and one of the bartenders as the pool remembered by drink on our last full day.

Food — fair to poor
This was BY FAR, the resorts Achilles heel. The food was bland, most was poorly prepared / overcooked, and the broken prices of seafood shells were downright dangerous. I had 3 seafood dishes during our stay, none of which I ate more than a few bites of (seafood risotto, bouillabaisse and a lunch buffet seafood stew), each of which looked like the mussel shells were smashed with hammers and thrown into a pot. The problem was that the sauces were thick and you really couldn’t see the fragments — to avoid a choking hazard or the need for expensive dental work, those dishes were deemed inedible.

Breakfast everyday at the buffet was very good with pretty much every breakfast staple available every day, with crepes and omelets made to order. Every bread and pastry was really good, and there was also fresh fruit (though nothing exotic, cantaloupe, honeydew and papaya, and most days watermelon).

Lunch at the poolside café was a mixed bag — the soft tacos crumbled when you tried to pick them up and were just some pork with a teaspoon of diced tomato and onion on top, the shrimp cerviche was also lacking taste, though the chicken wings and chimichurri steak were both tasty. Portions are small, so plan on two dishes per person.

The Diamond bar has name brand liquors, and the regular bar has mostly local brands I’ve never seen before. The first two days my wife had some Gray Goose, but the last 3 full days they apparently “ran out”. It was also absent from the Diamond Club for the remainder of our stay (I am definitely not above walking a bit to get someone a drink).

All-Inclusive (or not!)
This was a source of minor irritation to me. All means ALL, and I don’t expect upsell activity for things that should be included. They have flat screen TVs at the host stand at each restaurant and in a variety of places around the resort. Seeing the endless full-screen ads for 6 Coronas for $30 or a bottle of Gray Goose + 6 Red Bulls for $100 made me think of a Vegas bachelor party instead of a luxury all-inclusive resort. Similarly, each sit-down restaurant had a steak entrée or a lobster entrée for a $50 supplement (remember, the web site touts Lobster Thermidor at the French restaurant, but doesn’t tell you it’s not included in the all-inclusive). Given how poor the food was, there is no way I’d even consider paying a food supplement here!

Activities - very good beach and pools, but not much else
The side-by-side main and Diamond Club pools and the beaches were nice. Most of the beach seating near the pools was Diamond Club, which had covered and uncovered lounges, whereas the non-Diamond side was simply lounge chairs. There was plenty of other beach seating in the middle of the resort, but there were no nearby amenities (the bar in that area was closed our entire stay, no music or entertainment, etc.)

The pool entertainment was the "Vibe Team", and they were friendly, did some afternoon trivia, played lots of 80s-90s tunes, and organized a pool activity each afternoon.

Otherwise, there really weren’t any activities. Even the few activities advertised on the daily calendar on the TVs around the resort didn’t seem to take place. For the heck of it we were going to the Caribbean cooking demonstration one afternoon at the main pool (mostly to see if they would teach us how to make the same tasteless food that the resort served), but that didn’t seem to happen despite us being at the pool at the designated time.

Meeting the GM and F&B Manager
Dinner our last evening was our attempt of the buffet for dinner. It was Grenada night, and we were hoping for some real Caribbean food -- unfortunately, it was downright terrible. The featured dish was Oxtail (which we like), but there was virtually no meat on the bones. Of the 5 pieces I took, I would guess I managed to find less than one ounce of very overcooked meat. The "curry chicken" was also bland, so I ended up mostly eating bread, vegetables and ice cream on my last night.

As we walked down the restaurant ramp, two gentlemen dressed in polo shirts with the Grenada flag on them asked us how dinner was. I first asked who they were, because if they were from the tourism department, I wouldn’t have unloaded on them. When they introduced themselves as the General Manager and the Food & Beverage Manager, I told them dinner was terrible and suggested we find a place to discuss our stay.

We proceeded to give them the story of our stay experience, the good, the bad and the ugly. It was very direct, but always constructive and professional. In the course of the discussion, many of our perceptions came to light — most of the staff were brand new, barely trained, and thrown in the current situation. Sandals down the beach scooped a number of the staff they had hired for the reopening, causing a further scramble for staff. They told me they had some new chefs coming in from other islands, and they were shipping some food in from Miami since the local sources weren't reliable. They were patient, listened, agreed with most everything we told them, and didn’t become defensive or proffer silly excuses. I hope it was beneficial for them, and served to confirm much of what we surmised about the current situation.

Check out and departure
As we departed yesterday, they couldn’t even get the hotel bill to print, as the printer was not printing. Given my mixed experience with Bonvoy stays actually posting and this hotels newness to the program, I expect an uphill battle here, and I care more about exceeding 75 elite nights (I'm at 74 right now, with nothing scheduled for the rest of December).

Remember that $50 "resort credit" we were supposed to get -- well apparently that's only good for $25 off a bottle of premium champagne and $25 off a Romantic Dinner package. They showed me a generic letter when I asked them to confirm that the $50 credit went against my wife's spa services. Apparently we were supposed to be provided a personalized copy of that letter at check-in (another fail).

During the car ride back to the airport, I reflected on our stay and came away with the thought everyone staying from reopening until they get their act together should receive a coupon good for 50% off any future stay good through the end of 2024, along with a commemorative shirt that proudly say “Royalton Grenada - Beta Tester (2021)”.