Originally Posted by Eastbay1K

From 1964 through the afternoon of July 4, 2021, I've never had a slice of Papa John's pizza. And from bedtime on July 4, 2021 until the time I'm placed in a box, I don't expect I'll ever have another bite.

Picture it. 3 of us started the afternoon of July 4 at a lovely wine bar in Oakland, California (and somehow survived without being shot up, and that, after a bus ride to get there), and after a lovely bottle of Chablis, moseyed up the way to another spot, where #4 joined us for some more refreshing beverages. After a while, we decided to eat. And so we moseyed further to a great little spot that was closing early, but had no sign stating same, so we stood there like idiots for a few minutes before someone came up and said "we're closed." (Diners were still dining.) Well, there went that Luka's burger we were all craving. So, since #4 lived a few blocks away, and had a rooftop patio on the building (on which to watch a million $ of illegal fireworks explode), we moseyed a bit further to #4's pad. #3 decided that ordering pizza would be a good idea, and so he did so (without consultation) and after a while, Papa John's pizza arrived, which we brought up to the terraza.

OMFG. What a horrible piece of gloop. It weighed a relative ton (and not in that deep dish pizza sort of way), and was soggy and gross. Three days later, the trauma persists. It wasn't even worth a fraction of what I paid for it, which was nothing. I was almost longing for a piece of 1979 High School pizza, which in retrospect, was nearly Chez Panisse quality compared to Papa John's.

Oh, the horror. If there were only some Chablis left with which to wash it down. A Golden State Cider almost did the trick.

Did I mention how disgusting the Papa John's pizza is? I'm surprised Mama Celeste didn't assassinate him.