I can see it now.

Highest Revenue Generator -- You might be in jail, but at least you're getting props! (And the charges will be dropped because relevant evidence will be suppressed for 'security reasons.')

The Shakthi Award* -- For dedication to, and excellence in, groping.

The Nike (sponsored by Nike) -- Diligence and excellence in shoe mania.

The Edison -- 5-6 figure bonus for inventing the most secret rules.






*Shakthi is a Hindu goddess with many arms and hands.