lol!

I too can't stand the taste, smell, or look of coffee. I have had coffee twice in my life... once as part of some school science experiment, and the other at a cafe when I wanted to fit in while talking to some girl. The flavor is ghastly in my opinion, and I will never try it again. I guess it is pretty much an aquired taste like beer or vegemite. I feel no need anymore to fit in with the crowd or to burn my tastebuds with hot drinks all the time, so I'm happy.

I am not horrified by the sight of coffee machines though, but hey, everyone has something strange they don't like. The hotel people would probably help you out, but you may have them looking at you sideways for the rest of your stay! Could you just move it yourself, or would touching it be a traumatic experience?

Good luck mate! ^