26th July 2019
BA55
LHR-JNB
1905-0705
British Airways A380
Seat 3K
I made my way through the airside transit from T3-T5. There was a huge queue for the bus (presumably as many flights were delayed today), and I was absolutely busting for a pee but had kind of been hoping I might be able to defer until somewhere nicer. Sadly the temporary toilets installed down the end of the transfer bus queue it had to be (not recommended for anyone following this- use one in the main terminal if there is even the slightest possibility you might need it!!)
I briefly stopped by Boots to replace some basic essentials that were now making their way around random airports in Spain, and was served by the most gormless man on earth who failed to understand the concept of a tamper evident bag for liquids over 100mL purchased in the sterile area (even after 2 of his colleagues had explained it to him
and given him the actual bag)
Happily I was soon through the hallowed doors of the Concorde room. Starving, I made my way straight for dining and was looked after by a delightful young gentleman whose name I failed to note (he had a beard)
Menu
None of the mains really leapt out at me so I went with a starter and a dessert
I had champagne and sparkling water while I waited. The poor bloke accidentally poured still water for me initially, which he was insanely apologetic about, but I was happy to drink that to start with rather than having him take the glass of still away and bring me a fresh glass, which is what he wanted to do (I think I am not picky enough for the CCR)
Cured venison and pork belly terrine with apricot jelly and baby herb salad
This was very good, especially when combined with the apricot jelly and really hit the spot
Strawberry custard tart
Also excellent
In hindsight I should have gone for a cheese plate as well but instead skipped ahead to a pot of tea, which I messed up by pouring the milk first and failing to appreciate that the tea had not adequately brewed...(some people eh?!). The bubbles helped take that pain away though
Conscious that there were people waiting for a table, I retired to the terrace where I was kept supplied with LPGS proactively by the same chap
I had a quick freshen up and then made my way down to the gate relatively early as wanted to stretch the old legs given we were boarding from the C gates
Took me a little while but I eventually managed to find the correct A380, although the camera angle is not that great
Boarding was roughly on time and uneventful
I was greeted and helped to my seat. The gentleman offered to help stow my bag but that was not required as I parked it in the wardrobe again
There was a demanding gentleman seated nearby (more on that later) who took up a lot of the crew's time; all in, possibly as a result of this, I didn't feel this crew was as attentive of *me*, although she did bring me some of my favourite things (champagne, amenity kit, pyjamas AND slippers) and also snap a picture, useful annoying jealous people (although I look like a pillock and couldn't decide how to put my legs so...)
We were 16 minutes late departing
Shortly after take off, the crew came by for meal orders
For drinks I stuck with the LPGS
Canapes were served, including the maximal amount of black caviar I'm prepared to consume
(front to back) feta cheese with lovage pesto and smoked tomato, duck confit with caramelised hazelnut and orange ginger compote, Dorset crab with Oscietra caviar and pumpernickel
To start, I had selected the Croxton Manor goat's curd, as I am a big goats cheese fan
I didn't really feel the other components of the dish did anything for it. The asparagus was served cold but was still kind of overcooked and mushy (I assume it had been blanched at some point). I suspect this was an attempt to avoid the obvious flavour combinations such as goats cheese plus caramelised onions or mushrooms or some such, but all in I didn't really feel it "worked" as a dish
Being a forgiving person, I went for the steak again, because even a broken clock is right twice a day (sorry Uncle T!)- also I'm not a halibut fan, chicken seemed easier to stuff up than beef, and the tortellini was my back up plan
Seared fillet of aged Hertfordshire Beef with Cafe de Paris butter and red wine jus
A random assortment of sides was again served in a bowl- dauphinoise potatoes, creamed spinach with pine nuts, and glazed chatenay carrots
The steak was definitely better than the last one- definitely well done but I was able to cut and eat all of it without great difficulty. The sauce was, once again, to die for, and the sides were all good. So an A- to BA on this occasion- well done!
I was really tired but stayed awake for dessert as I wanted something sweet, and also for research purposes, you know
I went for the Apple tarte tatin. I was warned I would have to wait 15 minutes for it to be warmed up, which was fine but again with hindsight I should probably have taken a cheese course in the interim
Apple tarte tatin with vanilla ice cream
This was quite disappointing as despite the waiting it was still cold in the middle (this didn't seem to be related to the ice cream, before anyone asks), although the flavour was still good
The demanding bloke was clearly slightly pished at boarding time and continued to drink a lot during the meal service. He had largely been friendly if demanding/borderline inappropriate with the CC but became quite obnoxious when he wanted a whiskey and he wasn't happy with what the selection was (I forget whether it was JW black or blue but he wanted the other one or something else anyway). Happily they obviously had managed to intoxicate him enough that he went to sleep for most of the flight. I don't think he ate, only drank, which would have helped
I settled down for several hours and took a light breakfast when I woke up (remembering the fruit this time!)
Energising smoothie (blueberry and banana), fresh seasonal fruit appetiser, English Breakfast tea
At no point in the flight did the SCCM come by but I acknowledge I could have been sleeping or she could have been busy with the handsy man. Either way it wasn't really required for her to visit.
She was definitely present at disembarkation as handsy man stole her hat at one point and was trying to grab other members of the crew. Everyone kind of stood around awkwardly smiling- I suppose an F passenger has to be really badly behaved to be admonished, which is a bit sad
It was pretty foggy at JNB and apparently a fair few flights were delayed, but happily we had managed to make up some time and arrived only 3 minutes behind schedule
No requests for big kid cockpit visits this time, I was rather tired and just wanted to get off and through security. Also I had a Comair non-connection to catch so away I went
