Oh, right, forgot about that! I got such a good deal on that flight over that Dear Old Dad said he'd upgrade me to First Class for the short-haul trip. It was "in the budget". Boy that was great. It wasn't like being on an airplane, it was like being at a restaurant for dinner. Steward was a pro and obviously knew what he was doing. Best flight ever.

The really interesting part was having the first class boarding pass and getting access to the forbidden zone of the first class lounge in SFO. It was...well, not what I thought. It had the look of a place that had seen multiple rounds of cutbacks and been sliced to the bone. I make a little English newsletter in my town here to tell the local English speakers what's going on. In the process I made buddies with all the 5-star GMs and their sales and marketing and F&B managers, so on occasion I get invited to their shindigs (after first inviting them to my backyard Texas BBQ cookout, commonplace at home but a rarity in Asia! [in the land of the blind the one-eyed man is king]) so I have a passing familiarity with first class-ness. The lounge was just disappointing. There was a buffet...barely. The only meal-type thing they had was this Thai curry that was halfway good. The rest of the food was of the type obviously designed to fill you up while costing the least possible amount.

I bellied up to the bar, my F&B friends having taught me the virtue of good cocktails. At last, an open bar in a first class lounge and everything is FREE! With aplomb, I ordered a Singapore Sling, one of my favorites that they can't make around here. Well, I think those bartenders had forgotten how to do anything but pull beer taps and pour Chardonnay. None of them knew how to make one or were interested in learning. The youngest one looked it up on her phone and tried gamely to make it. It was OK. For my next drink I told her to just make a gin and tonic because that seemed more in the realm of possibility. One of the other bartenders was having a grand time talking to the others about using his employee discount to fly to Phoenix to play golf. I got the impression I had bothered him with my bizarre request for a mixed drink. I even had an hour's flight delay, hooray more time in the forbidden zone. The first class flight was great but the lounge, the long-awaited dreamed-about privilege, was a dud.

A little bit of both. I'm usually flexible a day or two, and can hunt around 4-6 weeks before the flight. I use Kayak.com or Skyscanner.com or the Mondodo one. I fly like I play in Vegas: I'm not a high roller. I'm not a low roller. I'm a low, low, low roller. It's like, "these $5 blackjack tables are killing me, where can I find two-dollar blackjack?" They can't get any lower for free booze than Gordon's gin and tonic water or Coors Lite, and that's just fine by me. Alas, the blackjack at the El Cortez and Western. Alas, the $19 midweek rooms at the Four Queens.

Wow, I had no idea! That sounds great! I'll get right on that...as soon as I figure out how to do it. It doesn't disqualify me that it was in 2017? It says "keep flying for 2020" as I haven't taken any flights yet in 2019. I'm looking on https://mystatus.united.com/ is there some hidden button to upgrade? I assume this is one of those "jump through the hoops" things. Here's the "previous year" screen:



Thanks to everyone for your keen insights and helpful advice! I was about to throw in the towel on this frequent flyer thing, but now I understand it a bit better. I didn't realize they wouldn't give upgrades to anyone without paying. My problem is I don't fly enough to become an expert on it, and frequent flyer programs really reward those who become experts on them. Boy, did I ask in the right place. Thanks everyone, I look forward to an upgraded economy seat this upcoming flight!