Well, I now have my reference points for BBQ as practiced in the USA, having spent the past weekend in Kansas City. Suffice to say, I both agree and disagree with various of the posts, but thank everyone for their contributions. As we all know, taste is a very personal thing, but in many ways it is wonderful that we don't all agree all the time.
In my case, I did not find the perfect BBQ experience in a single spot, though I did find some good reference points. I stuck to ribs, which is my pet indulgence. So here goes -- all by the way, washed down with Boulevard Pale or Belgian Flat Tire ales -- my impressions.
GATES had the best sauce, albeit a long way from the best I've had in my limited experience. Their hotter version beats the regular. Unfortunately, I found their rub too intense and while acceptable, a bit overpowering.
ARTHUR BRYANT'S is just about everything it is advertised to be. Here I prefered the rub and the meat, and found both version of their sauce to be lacking any kick.
The all round loser -- save for my dining companion -- was JACK'S STACK SMOKEHOUSE. Characterless sause, moderately good rub on the mixed platter of pork, beef and lamb ribs.
I particularly want to thank mwp2paris for his notes over on the SPG forum to my querry.