I find nothing sucks the joy out of travel quicker than being around business travelers. They are a at once a reminder of everything I am trying to escape from when I travel and a too frequent source of painful distraction.
I hate the shop talk. I don’t need to hear the two of you discuss your marketing goals for your stupid f’ing wine cooler.
I hate the safe soulless banter that passes for your personal conversations. You don’t want to be there having the conversation. I don’t want to be next to you having to listen to it.
I hate the office you create with your lap top and whatever other crap you drag around and I hate how you go into a full clench if anyone intrudes by say reclining a seat or trying to walk past you or just breathing.
I hate your status. Your DYKWIA gold platinum diamond elite status that has polluted your very soul. ‘This place sucks because they didn’t acknowledge my status.’ ‘This hotel was the worst because they didn’t give me my upgrade.’ ‘This airline is garbage because they didn’t offer me a golden throne.’
I hate it when you swarm the bar or crowd the dance floor. What’s the term for a group of overly competitive a’holes who don’t really like each other but are still trying to party down? A clench? A puke? A puke. That works.
If I could I’d build a big beautiful lounge that could hold every business traveler far away from me. Really, you have all earned it.