For that, you just became a Mucci of the Silver Hairbrush.

Salacious - you put me in mind of this. What you do have to be so careful about is discussing passengers who are being particularly vexatious. I think that a TFTG dealt with the man who was being discussed in the F Galley. I was one of those saying "NO! NEVER!" and my laugh does sound like a saucepan going down a mountain. What he had done was to cover the window in the lav with a piece of toilet paper. I'd heard of this before but never in years seen such a thing.

In he stormed - having heard this - in spite of our trying to be quiet.

"Yes, I put that bog roll over the window, you can see right through it" he said." I'm modest and what's so funny about that?"

Before I could stop my wicked, never-to-be-discrete tongue, I replied.
" I'm so glad that you did. The Captain said that we nearly collided with a passing witch who had nearly fallen of her broom laughing. I'll put it in my report to British Airways as this is a problem that needs addressing. Would you like another drink Sir?"

In truth, I nearly wet myself, window or no window. The two others felt an urgent need to go and discuss this with their colleagues elsewhere on the aircraft. My main concern was whether I had remembered to put a spare pair of knickers in my handbag.

Oddly enough, I was certain that he'd complain, but as one of the others pointed out - it would be like writing "I am stupid beyond belief, please section me."

I am sure that I have tol you that before, but I had quite forgotten about that!