Originally Posted by
chollie
I think we're going to see more incidents of 'grooming' under the guise of frisking - for both boys and girls.
Young kids go to the airport. They are now told they have to let strangers touch them to protect them from the 'bad guys'. They see their parents submit. They sense the tension and discomfort (come on, it's too much to believe that even those who approve of this stuff enjoy it. I believe even Pistole described it as 'uncomfortable' but said our social norms will have to change).
So young kids will be told that strangers can touch them, they can expect to be uncomfortable and not like it, it will be to 'protect' them. So how long before a scoutmaster or a coach 'frisks' kids to 'protect' them, when in fact it's the first step in grooming a kid. Worst of all, we can't even tell our kids to follow their instincts - if it doesn't feel right, say no. They will have been trained to accept invasive touching by strangers, even if it makes them feel uncomfortable. And they will probably have asked 'why?' or 'what if I say no?' at some point and been told in no uncertain terms 'you have to'.
I found this after researching some TSA stuff. Years later, seems you've been proven right. People just accept it now, and as a parent who flies a lot, my daughter has had to get used to the pat downs. Whether I would feel different if I had a son, I don't know, because for all claims of equality, boys seem to be, in general, more relaxed about touching. But my daughter certainly wasn't the first time and neither was I - but what could I do? Someone once tried groping a TSA agent back and she got convicted of assault, so it's a good job I didn't fight back. After having told my daughter that nobody can touch her genitals (except a doctor if she has a medical problem there, or me (her mom) if there's some important reason like she's injured and can't wash herself until she's healed), I literally stood and watched as a TSA adult woman rubbed her hands over my daughter's crotch right in front of me, my 9-year-old daughter visibly uncomfortable and looking to me for help. She was asking me about it and all I could think to say was "It's alright" (or words to that effect), but she pressed the issue, asking why it was alright if I told her before that it wasn't. I told her that she was touched to protect her, and she told me it made her feel uncomfortable. As I knew we were going to be flying a lot, I told her that she was just going to have to accept it. The worst bit is I distinctly remember her asking me "I have to accept being touched by strangers now?" and I said yes. She asked why and actually did ask what would happen if she said "no", and I told her exactly what you said - "you have to". And told her that if she said "no", she'd get in trouble.
Fast forward to now, and she's totally used to being fondled by the TSA. She just accepts it as part of life and doesn't complain any more. But I recently learned a female family friend had been touching her sexually. She was talking about what they had been doing while the friend was looking after my daughter, and she told me about the touching in a really nonchalant way, as though it was nothing. It had been going on for months, but she hadn't told me because people touch her at the airport now, so she's used to her crotch being touched. That's not what I meant when I said she'd have to get used to the airport touching, but it's what's happened. She's completely normalised being groped, that she just submissively accepted my female friend doing it to her. As you say, I can't tell her to trust her instincts because of what was said before, because she's been trained to accept invasive touching by strangers. So our social norms have gone from "nobody can touch you there" to "anyone can touch you there and you shouldn't complain about it". Great. On the bright side, at least she doesn't seem traumatised.