stevens: you might benefit from going over to the Hawai`i board and looking through some threads there that are loaded with the information you're looking for. That board can be found:
http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/forum...ysprune=&f=435
Again, islands will have differing experiences. Kaua`i is far more laid back than the city life of O`ahu (although the Ihilani is quite isolated near Kapolei and so is the RC on Maui) and the semi-touristy/plantation life of Maui.
I can only suggest that you provide more information on what exactly you're looking for, then we can move on to the "must dos"
Best of luck!
aloha
p.s. Welcome to Flyertalk!