Continue with responses but thanks for the ideas. For airlines, I participate in nearly all the major ones, except JetBlue and Hawaiian. That used to be a lot of programs but as airlines consolidated, that left only AA, DL, UA, WN, AS, VX. I now fly all of these 6 airlines on domestic flights and do not let the honey trap affect me, except B6.

With hotels, I think I will follow the advice of not letting the honey trap or tail wagging the dog. There is a slight advantage with Hilton Honors Gold, being the Hilton Garden Inn breakfast but breakfast elsewhere is usually reasonably convenient and not expensive. (Hotel breakfasts are expensive).

My conclusion is that I will pick 2 or 3 hotel programs as primary and then choose to earn miles when staying at the non-primary hotels. For example, I'll earn miles at Holiday Inns.